Runtime:
97 minutes
Directed
by: Rod Amateau
Starring:
Anthony Newley, Mackenzie Astin, Katie Barberi, Ron MacLachlan
From:
Atlantic Releasing Corporation
Oh
my God, this movie... believe it or not I saw it as a kid. I only
remembered parts of it, but even then the movie didn't seem quite
right to me. Of course as an adult I know how wrong-headed it is and
how it's a cult classic due to its badness. But, even though I have
had the DVD for a few years now I was quite frankly a little scared
to watch it again; I haven't seen the famed Nostalgia Critic review
on the movie (I usually don't watch him, to be honest) but I heard a
podcast review and they hated the film. I mean, they loathed it.
Finally I watched it tonight and yes it is really awful and not
appropriate for kids despite it being a PG-rated film and it being
based on what was then controversial trading cards for kids; but, it
is also horrible in a hilarious way. I laughed often.
Let
me try and recap the plot: We find out that the GPK come from a
garbage can spaceship and they all fit in it; it must just be like
the TARDIS... anyhow, they end up at the antique store of Captain
Manzini (Newley; that poor bastard). He has a pal, a boy nearly 15
years old named DODGER (Astin) who deals with bullies that look to be
in their 20's. The leader of that is a douche named JUICE. His
girlfriend is TANGERINE, who is at least 16 as she drives a Triumph
TR6 British convertible, of all vehicles. She doesn't seem like such
a bad lady, at least not at first. There's a nameless guy whose best
talent is wearing mesh shirts, and a lady who is big and buff; I
mean, she could be Ronda Rousey's next opponent! They always pick on
poor Dodger.
Well, as Dodger is a horny 14 year old boy (a redundant
statement, I know) he has the hots for Tangerine, who is hot in an
80's sort of way, with her giant hair, hilariously bad clothing and
loud makeup. She happens to be in fashion and designs her own
clothes, which she sells out of her car in the alleyways of the
town's clubs, where the girls of the club go out to buy. Luckily for
Dodger, the GPK somehow are great at sewing and making clothing
themselves (that must be the talent on their home planet) so he uses
them to make clothing and impress the girl he lusts for, and it
works... or so he thinks. Turns out she's a bitch who uses him and
Tangerine does a good job of cockteasing (to be blunt) that poor sap
to do her bidding.
Yes,
that is the actual plot of the movie.
That
doesn't even take into account how this world has a “State Home for
the Ugly”, how the GPK do such things as fart often and piss their
pants, or how one of them is even a bigger stereotype than Andew Dice
Clay's Diceman character, or how Ali Gator is a humanoid-alligator
thing that talks like a sassy old black man, loves eating human toes
(foot fetish!) and goes to a biker bar and gets drunk. That doesn't
even include them stealing a Pepsi truck, either.
Oh,
and a girl wants Tangerine's shirt so she takes it off in front of
Dodger, who looked like he almost had an accident in his pants. That
doesn't beat, though, the finale where you see dresses ripped off of
random adult ladies; yes, women running around in their bras and
panties in this PG-rated film.
Like
I said, this is pretty awful but oh my God is this bizarre movie so
great to laugh at. I guffawed at the music, the clothing you see on
everyone, and the hair you see on the ladies. Talk about dating it to
the 1980's in a major way. You only see stuff like that in that
glorious decade. And let's not start on “The State Home of the
Ugly”, an actual thing in this movie. Check this out if you want
big laughs; maybe I'm the only one but this is hilarious to me.
I'll
be back Friday night.
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