Runtime:
100 minutes
Directed
by: Andy Sidaris
Starring:
Darby Hinton, Sybil Danning, Art Metrano, Shelley Taylor Morgan
From:
Malibu Bay Films
Here's
the first film in a set of movies I got awhile back but hadn't tried
to start watching until last night. It is part of Girls, Guns &
G-Strings: The Andy Sidaris Collection which you can find online at
Amazon for only a few bucks. The late Mr. Sidaris directed various
sports programs then made some random films before deciding here to
create direct to video films set and filmed in sunny locales
featuring plenty of busty women, almost all of whom take off their
tops and expose their bare breasts. That's most important of all,
even more so than story or acting ability; there seemed to always be
a few Playmates who appear in this films.
The
plot, as is: Cody Abilene (Hinton; he played Daniel Boone's kid on
the 60's TV show of the same name) is a private investigator. He is
asked by a Countess who is also involved with a computer company
(Danning; not surprisingly, she is one of the ladies who exposes her
boobs) to investigate what's going on with the theft of computer
secrets to “The Soviets”. What ends up happening is a busy case
of wacky individuals, from a fey guy who ends up being a
cross-dresser to two muscle-bound thugs. Other characters appear who
apparently are only there to pad the run time, like a stereotypical
band of hillbillies who always want to race Cody on the streets.
On
a technical scale, the movie isn't great. The pacing seems off and I
often got the feeling that it wasn't edited the best. The story is
actually complex and even when the last few minutes of the movie are
someone explaining all of the events, it doesn't always make sense.
More time was spent on showing how many ladies find Cody to be
arousing. More than a dozen different women end up exposing their
breasts! No kidding. One of the women who go topless has the name
JUNE KHNOCKERS. Yes, that's how it was spelled. That says a lot about
what sort of film this is.
Yet,
while there isn't a lot of action (I have heard the later movies he
did had more of that) it is still a rather entertaining movie for the
goofy lark it is. The hero-who drives a red DeLorean and carries around a cowskin case!-is a flawed
hero; while he has a .44, his aim is terrible and it's rare for him
to successfully hit anything. Danning and Metrano have small roles
but as well-known actors don't always appear in Sidaris's films,
their contributions are noted. It's a comedy/action/mystery sort of
thing and it usually is funny. That makes it an easy watch. The boobs
help out too! It's not high art for sure but it is fun to watch if
you want to shut off your brain one rainy afternoon or evening. It's
not painful at all; you should enjoy all the goofy moments and how
Mr. Sidaris has a small appearance as a dude who drives a big RV with
his wife.
So
overall I am glad I finally saw one of his films. I've known about
them for many years and it was about time. I'll be back Monday night.
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