Pinball Summer (a.k.a. Pick-Up Summer)

Pinball Summer (a.k.a. Pick-Up Summer) (1980)

Runtime: 99 minutes

Directed by: George Mihalka

Starring: Michael Zelniker, Carl Marotte, Karen Stephen, Helene Udy, Thomas Kovacs

From: Brookdale Productions

Here is a movie I first found out about via a podcast reviewing it a few months ago (most of them hated it, for reasons I'll get into later) and I just discovered a few days ago that someone uploaded it to YouTube in 7 parts (not that I'd give away where Part 1 was) so I decided to check it out as it just sounded rather ridiculous from the podcast review.

In short, this is Canuxploitation (it was filmed in Quebec) about a pair of guys who go out with a pair of sisters and they deal with their rivals, a small biker gang, and the backdrop is a pinball competiton at Pete's Arcade. Amusingly, not only did this director direct the original My Bloody Valentine a year later, but several of the main members of this cast appear in that film.

It's best to describe this film in bullet-points.

• What's so wrong about it... the “protagonists” are the ones who are the biggest A-holes! Sure, there are many douches in the film, but the heroes definitely act the worst. They needlessly harrass a rich kid just because he's rich, pretty much. They also harrass a poor chubby and possibly mentaly handicapped guy who works at Pete's Arcade, named WHIMPY.
• To give an example, the alleged villain and leader of the 4 man biker gang, Bert, actually treats Whimpy far kinder than the heroes do. The two sides fight over the trophy that is a prize for the winner of the pinball competition. Whimpy finds it and is going to give it to Bert... in exchange for joining their gang. Yes it's that kind of film. Whimpy has to lose his virginity first. Bert actually hooks him up with a nice-looking hooker with nice boobs who is in her 40's. He could have gotten her an ugly one, a tranny, or what have you, but did the best he could and also teaches Whimpy some social norms. Of course the deflowering goes awry and Whimpy gets embarrassed... again.
• There's a whole lot of homoeroticism throughout, especially between the two heroes, but there's also the bikers watching Whimpy trying to score; one of the bikers is so horny he starts dry-humping the guy in front of him! And this happens a few times.
• The soundtrack is cheesetastic, in a good way.
• Of course you see a decent amount of female nudity.
• There are many wacky hijinx to be seen.
• Pop top cans of beer are seen, amusingly, including Pabst Blue Ribbon.

As I knew already that the two protagonists are D-bags and loathsome human beings and the bikers come off as better dudes, I was able to get some enjoyment out of this stupid, stupid film. Most of the guys on the podcast hated it because they had no idea how badly handled the characters are.

I'll be back Sunday night.