Eaten Alive

Eaten Alive (1976)

Runtime: 91 minutes

Directed by: Tobe Hooper

Starring: Neville Brand, Mel Ferrer, Crystin Sinclaire, Stuart Whitman, Kyle Richards

From: Mars Productions Corporation

Why not start off Spooky Season ’25 on the 8th anniversary of Tobe Hooper’s death by viewing one of his pictures for the first time?

As I’ve always said around this time of year, the official “Hoop-Tober” lists that some on Letterboxd do, I don’t officially participate but I’m happy to view a few dozen random films that are horror, feature spooky figures or otherwise are tangentially related to Halloween. Also as always, there’s a few ideas when it concerns what to view, but the majority is on a whim. In early November, a list will be posted of what was experienced.

Speaking of “on a whim,” that includes watching Eaten Alive via Arrow’s streaming service, seldom used by me but will be used more often until November. I wish the plot of psychotic motel owner Neville Brand who murders SOB’s in the Southern Bayou and feeds his victims to a giant crocodile… I wish this would have been a movie to love instead of just like. My opinion has nothing to do with the presence of two sexual assaults in the first 10 minutes, or a dog dying at around the 20-minute mark—although I know some will pass on the movie because of those plot points, or that child actress Kyle Richards was put in serious peril.

Eaten Alive is an OOT experience in every way-when the movie is full of oddballs and big, broad performances it can be exhausting. I don’t fault the cast-I don’t even fault William Finley’s Roy, although I was absolutely perplexed by that character and everything he did. Between the performances, the yelling, the arguing, the atonal electronic score that’s augmented at times by screams and animal sounds… it almost gave me a headache.

All that said, Eaten Alive was still a good time. The intent was presumably to be disorienting and surreal; they succeeded at that task. The dump of a motel always has a foggy exterior & said exterior is either bathed in the “Argento lights” of red or blue—it was an interesting artifice. This world is believably grimy & run-down. The actors did a fine job, whether famous faces (Brand, who was a highlight, Marilyn Burns) or not so much, like Crystin Sinclaire. The sleazy, disturbing atmosphere was strong; this is especially true w/ Robert Englund’s Buck.

Due to Tarantino “lifting” his opening line, I at least had some familiarity w/ Buck. However, between the Southern accent and his obsession w/ sex (especially a certain position), I guffawed more than once. This is why a good time was still had despite my grievances. Also, even if Freddy never happened to Englund, there’s no doubt he still would have made a decent living as a familiar, reliable character actor.

Of course there were problems w/ Hooper during production (sadly, that seemed to occur more often than not)-even so, no regrets in finally viewing this production. Maybe the passage of time will make me think of Eaten Alive more fondly; if I view and review The Funhouse again, there’s the chance I’d rate it as better than “good.” Whether that or another Tobe film will be tackled this year is still up in the air. Now, the feeling is “elation” because this great time of year is finally here.

And Then There Were None (The 40's Version)

And Then There Were None (1945)

Runtime: 97 minutes

Directed by: Rene Clair

Starring: Barry Fitzgerald, Walter Huston, Louis Hayward, Roland Young, June Duprez

From: 20^th Century Fox

Would people be more horrorstruck that I haven’t read the original Agatha Christie novel (which has a rather unfortunate original title that will be explained at the end of the review), haven’t seen any film adaptation of the story, or that this is my first Rene Clair movie? The future will hold Clair’s films in his native France; this was selected due to my desire to view a mystery picture, it was public domain-I found a 4K version-and the time where I start watching plenty of horror movies until Halloween is starting real soon—who knows how many films from the 30’s and 40’s will be tackled between now and then.

Even I knew-from cultural osmosis-the plot outline: ten strangers are invited to a mansion on a remote island, the host is not present but a phonograph record is played where the host proclaims murder accusations against each guest, then each guest is murdered. I don’t know if the other adaptations or even the original story had a light, humorous tune throughout-some reviewers weren’t a fan of this tone which is understandable but I was amused by this tale, the bickering, the lack of trust, the spying, etc.

The stormy island setting was an appropriate one, the cast sometimes delivering bold performances but IMO playing it broad seemed fitting for the tone, and it was a cast I enjoyed, famous to me and not as famous. From others I understand that Clair’s other films could be more unconventional--however, None was nicely-filmed as something more orthodox. The opening contains not a word of dialogue for several minutes yet the behavior of the characters interacting w/ each other on a boat ride to the island told a visual story. ATTWN was a delightful mystery that was well-made.

I was happy to finally see a version of a popular fictional story; other adaptations may eventually be tackled. That’s whether it be titled And Then There Were None or Ten Little Indians, which is a nursery rhyme sung in the film and it played a key role. What is uncomfortable to mention yet true: there was a related song sung in minstrel shows, using the most offensive word out there. As that word always had different meaning in terms of its offensiveness in the UK, that’s why Christie’s original title for the novel was one I’m unable to say uncensored. What a surprise people will have if they read the book’s Wiki page and see the title!

Wayne's World 2

Wayne’s World 2 (1993)

Runtime: 95 minutes

Directed by: Stephen Surjik

Starring: The returning characters plus many famous faces in typically small roles

From: Paramount

As I reviewed teenage favorite Wayne’s World in January 2020 (right before the world went down the toilet!) it was overdue for me to discuss a sequel that never became a favorite and obviously was rushed into production but is not terrible. I enjoyed the first Wayne's World as much as an adult as during my youth.

More than a gag or two from the original is replayed, the plot momentum is not as strong-heck, too often the movie lurches from scene to scene awkwardly-and the humor is more hit or miss. There’s quite the explanation I’ll provide at the end of the review for why the film seems like something they pulled out of their collective butts!

That proclamation made, Wayne’s World 2 is still fine. The amount of times I at least chuckled, all the famous faces (everyone from Aerosmith & Rip Taylor to Bob Odenkirk as a nerd, James Hong & Jay Leno), some subtle background gags, the boomer music, the presence of ladies like Tia Carrere, Heather Locklear, Kim Basinger, Drew Barrymore… schwing! Wayne experiences a vision from Jim Morrison to put on a huge “Waynestock” in Aurora, Illinois as Christopher Walken in a total Walken role is a music producer with his eye on Cassandra. The plot is not much more complex than that… aside from Garth getting a girlfriend in Basinger. 

As flawed as the film is, as a middle-aged dude it can’t be hated by me when laughs were to be had, including Walken’s dancing years before the Weapon of Choice video… yet this will be concluded by me spilling some tea. Penelope Spheeris famously did not return, due to problems w/ Mike Myers. I knew that; what I didn’t know until last night was that until late in pre-production, Wayne’s World 2 originally had a completely different plot. 

Piecing together this from both Wiki and the IMDb, Myers was a fan of the 1949 British comedy Passport to Pimlico—the original plot for 2 would be loosely based on that and have Wayne & Garth forming their own country, seceding from the United States. Myers either didn’t know or didn’t care of the problems that Paramount would have doing an unauthorized remake… and Paramount didn’t realize it would be an unauthorized remake until almost too late. The studio was as aggravated at Ol’ Mike as you’d expect. There is even more proof of how Myers has a toxic reputation in the entertainment industry as “someone difficult to work with.”

On a lighter note, one day I should finally get around to viewing Withnail and I. Ralph Brown’s wacky roadie character here was apparently a slightly different version of the character he played in Withnail.

I Revisited Marked for Death

Despite my and everyone else’s current opinion of Steven Seagal, this is a movie that was viewed in part to give it more than a few sentence review on Letterboxd that I originally wrote 12 years (!) ago. Out for Justice also needs a better review but for the sake of those that think Seagal is a irredeemable human being and would rather not think of him at all… it’ll probably be awhile.

As unsavory as he is, I’m able to separate the art from the artist and enjoy most of his theatrical movies; almost all the DTV pictures are varying degrees of useless yet except for the Under Siege pictures and Executive Decision, they were for the most part enjoyable B-movies that had fun action scenes featuring Dudes Getting Wrecked ™ and plenty of Aura Farming for the unstoppable lead. His acting never really got better yet I usually wasn’t offended by its quality.

No one knows why 20th Century Fox had two major 1990 releases featuring Jamaican drug gangs as villains, but they did between this and Predator 2. Seagal is John Hatcher, a DEA who retires from the ranks because he’s (arguably right) about the War on Drugs being an unwinnable war. He returns to his Illinois town to visit family, along w/ ex-Army pal Keith David. Wouldn’t you know it, he and David run afoul of a Jamaican drug gang led by an OOT bad guy only known as SCREWFACE. They messed w/ his family—the expected retort occurs. Also expected: the patois heard from the villains, including curses that probably shouldn’t be repeated by me, a dumb white guy.

The movie naturally could be nitpicked to death, whether legitimately or in an insufferable fashion. This won’t be done by me; instead, the trashy fan that this was will be praised. The expected broken limbs occur, along w/ shootouts, brawls, and even a car chase. The circumstances as to why aren’t known but Seagal wanted Dwight H. Little as director; perhaps he liked the 4th Halloween film… in any case he did a fine job as director.

As others have noted (whether w/ this or speaking generally) the way that older films are scored and/or shot in terms of cinematography can go a long way in making the experience at least a tolerable one. Veteran cinematographer Ric Waite made the film look better than many modern films & I enjoyed the appropriate score from James Newton Howard; in addition, the eclectic soundtrack featured rap, R&B, and naturally reggae. Jimmy Cliff (who appears as himself singing a song… a song that has Seagal w/ a singing part!) is among the reggae artists present.

The cast has many familiar faces, even if they were typically small parts: Danielle Harris, Earl Boen, Joanna Pacula, Al Isreal, Danny Trejo, Peter Jason… this plus David’s large role, Basil Wallace’s OOT turn as Screwface & filming several scenes on the lovely island of Jamaica were further assets in my satisfaction w/ a B-movie that still entertains many genre fans 3 ½ decades later despite the star both on and off the screen.

Samson and Delilah

Samson and Delilah (1949)

Runtime: 134 minutes

Directed by: Cecil B. DeMille

Starring: Hedy Lamarr, Victor Mature, George Sanders, Henry Willcoxon, Olive Deering

From: Paramount

Three notes to begin this review: 

One: I’m posting this at an odd time due to my schedule; the second review likely will be real late, at least in terms of Florida time.

Second: My apologies for not spending much time viewing full-length motion pictures of this age or older as of late.

Three: Aside from a small role (as Joan of Arc!) in the atrocious The Story of Mankind, this is the first movie I’ve seen Hedy Lamarr in; I know some will be APPALLED by this pronouncement. This was not done deliberately; it’s more stupidity on my part. Once I learned years ago that she’s an awesome dame who was a self-taught inventor that played a key role in inventing what would later morph into Bluetooth and an early version of Wi-Fi… what a fool I am.

As this played on TCM during their Summer Under the Stars day devoted to Lamarr & I’ve enjoyed every Cecil B. DeMille production I’ve tackled… this was entertaining hokum, for sure. Of course, it was about what I expected for a Biblical production w/ the director, this time adapting a story from Holy Scripture that many know even if it’s the two leads and where Samson’s strength is from.

I won’t reveal much more about a story that probably at least a few are well-familiar with. Victor Mature as Samson has all the luck… besides his status as an SOB that killed a lion with his bare hands, a young Angela Lansbury, Lamarr, and Olive Deering all vie for his love. All three lovely ladies were enchanting although Hedy’s part (what a slew of crop-tops she wore) was of course the boldest and she nailed the role. I was amused by how much of an ill-tempered hothead Samson was, and the way he got revenge on those darn Philistines. You know, I might be on Delilah’s side here!

In any event, this was a delight visually, full of many different hues presented in Technicolor. Whether outdoor shooting in the desert or lavish sets, that plus the costumes set the mood for this desert romance/melodrama/epic which is long yet was a rewarding journey for me. Several other familiar faces appeared, including teen actor Russ Tamblyn and in a juicy part, George Sanders as the scheming, sarcastic ruler.

If not my favorite from DeMille, I still had fun and most importantly, I now better appreciate Hedy Lamarr; without a doubt, more of her work will be discussed in the future.

War 2

War 2 (2025)

Runtime: 173 minutes

Directed by:  Ayan Mukerji

Starring: Hrithik Roshan, N.T. Rama Rao, Jr., Kiara Avani, Ashutosh Rana, Anil Kapoor

From: A few different Hindi companies

I discovered what War 2 was good for…

Despite the negative reviews I’ve already read for War 2, I enjoyed the first one-also seen theatrically-I haven’t viewed Indian cinema theatrically in over a year, and for me, the promise of experiencing Hindi-language badass Hrithik Roshan against Telugu-language badass N.T. Rama Rao Jr. was too enticing to turn down. It even played at AMC cinemas in & around Orlando; no excuse for me not to give it a shot, despite the almost 3-hour runtime. Those unfamiliar, Rao was Komaram Bheem in the legendary RRR.

Boy, was this movie not as good as War, let alone incredible like RRR was. Roshan returns as Kabir, uber-badass and lone wolf who left India’s foreign intelligence agency during the first film and has continued to be a mercenary. Opposing him is Rao; yes, it is much more complicated than that (including an overarching enemy, a love interest, and Indian political figures being targeted) but that’s the main plot thread.

My main issue: in the past I’ve giggled at how ludicrous and divorced from reality some Indian cinema could be. Sadly, War 2 was a bridge (or perhaps, several bridges) too far for me; it was SO asinine and absurd, the movie felt like a parody of 21st century Indian action cinema, at least to a dumb white American like me. How macho the male leads were, the slow-motion, the wind through their hair, the love interest, the bombastic, physics-defying action, the logic-defying plot, and yes… a homoerotic relationship! You may call it “an epic bromance;” that works too.

I hate to phrase it that way as the intent is to not offend an entire nationality, and a large one at that. To an outsider like me, some of the genre examples do give off that impression, even if it’s born from ignorance and a lack of cultural knowledge. Well, it is clear to me why many on Letterboxd in the same boat as me (or even those of Indian heritage) have noted what could be interpreted as gay subtext. Of course I have no issue with homosexuality; as goofy as the movie was, that was one of the elements that made me laugh and not hate War 2.

As nonsensical as the film was, as mind-numbing as the action beats and cliches could be, as goofy as the CG usually looked, I can still say that War 2 was OK. Like in the first film, several exotic locations are visited around the world, ones not always shown in Western cinema. There are several catchy songs, sometimes accompanied by fancy dance routines. Here, there was also Kiara Advani, a.k.a. the love interest. She is a lovely lady unfamiliar to me; there’s a gratuitous scene of her in a bikini which afterwards I learned caused a stir in that part of the world. Myself, she certainly looked fit & in shape!

No hate on those that can enjoy War 2 for its most bombastic and bold moments. To reiterate, I still laughed often at the spectacle in front of me. A crying shame then that the plot is such rubbish, and the final act felt interminable.

I'll Catch Up Tomorrow

For now, my revisit of 2016's Shin Godzilla, thankfully experienced again theatrically and thankfully something I still love: 

Even babies love Godzilla!

I saw Shin Godzilla in October 2016, theatrically; wrote up a glowing review for it and all. Never revisited it despite my high rating—thus, when GKIDS randomly decided to wide release a 4K version of this film into cinemas across the United States-to advertise their upcoming UHD release-I couldn't turn down the opportunity. OK, maybe it's not “random”--Godzilla Minus One was an unexpected hit here so why not try for that magic yourself? Yes, there was a baby at the screening I attended last night; that did not turn into a horror story but more on that at the end. To my relief, the film both looked & sounded tremendous.

I feel as if I can be less vague than in the OG review. As the original Gojira tackled nuclear fears and rebuilding after World War II, Shin tackled the awful 2011 Japan had between the earthquake, the subsequent tsunami then the subsequent Fukushima nuclear reactor meltdown. The implication is that the Japanese government in '11 was mired in bureaucracy & red tape, full of woefully unprepared, panicked leaders apprehensive in how to properly handle those tragedies. Thus, when an unknown googly-eyed creature (it's still a little odd that it sported this appearance in its first two forms, but alright then) appeared in Tokyo, there were plenty of meetings and press conferences, along with the audience being introduced to what seemed like dozens & dozens of characters.

It's not overwhelming at all; rather, that message was satire, usually not subtle yet that's OK. The focus narrows down to a broad but manageable amount of characters (mainly on the lower rungs of the hierarchy) who attempt to stop an unstoppable creature. There were two aspects that weren't stressed in my original review. When there's Godzilla action, there is plenty of destruction, especially during the “holy crap!” scene of the picture. As there's plenty of time spent w/ the humans, the drama was solid along w/ interesting. The leads are mad at their own government for being spineless along w/ the Americans for their interference and interjecting themselves; insert your own comments if you wish.

It was heartwarming to see a wide variety of different people coming together in an attempt to avoid tragedy and enact a risky plan to save the day. Shin was filmed in a vibrant manner, buttressed by one heck of a score that used both motifs from Akira Ifukube's iconic music and bold music from Shiro Sagisu. A bold interpretation of a film like this won't be for all G fans; personally, I can enjoy (or not enjoy) every kind of Gojira movie, silly to serious. CG that doesn't always look great-especially compared w/ another epic franchise entry, Minus One-I won't wait so long to revisit this at home.

As mentioned in the beginning, a literal baby (its age unknown to me; eyes weren't laid on the little tyke) was heard in the crowd during the film. It was only on a few occasions and no crying occurred. As the most noise happened during the picture's biggest, most epic rousing speech, the leap will be made that the baby loved Shin Godzilla!