I Revisited Crocodile Dundee

This time it was a different cut: 

So, I found a file created by someone who attempted to restore the original version of Crocodile Dundee. Yes, there’s an original cut released only in Australia that was edited before it played elsewhere around the world-what I’ll call “The International Cut.” It was found on Twitter by an account which attempts to restore older pictures; to be blunt, I don’t always like this user’s sour attitude, yet it was from this person that I learned there’s a new 4K restoration of the movie, known as The Encore Cut. In fact, it excises two scenes—likely I don't need to clarify which moments were banished.

Of course this Twitter user had negative comments to make about “modern audiences.” No way will I weigh in on whether or not those transphobic moments should be removed I’m a heterosexual male so my opinion isn’t worth much in this instance. Paul Hogan himself approved of this new version, for whatever it’s worth… but the film’s director (Peter Faiman) doesn’t feel the same. If anyone’s curious about this Australian version I saw, it is at the moment on archive.org.

The additional material is mainly related to building characters although there is an increase in vulgarity plus Aussie slang which sometimes I had to use context clues to decipher. As this cut only made it to the DVD era, the sound and picture still aren’t stellar. Yet, it was still nice to see an alternate version of a film that unexpectedly became a huge hit worldwide; would you believe that in the United States, the gross was only two million dollars less than Top Gun, the number one film in the country for the year? Because reasons, in America for awhile there was an Aussie wave where that country & its products were white-hot.

The viewing experience is little-different from the cut that most people know. It’s still a rather basic fish out of water film where NYC newspaper reporter Sue is a Shiela that meets the titular character in Australia (the titular character has an exaggerated reputation) where she’s baffled by the rural Outback… then the roles are reversed when she brings the bloke to New York City. There’s love triangle drama yet the plot is incredibly basic and lightweight. It’s the charm of the two leads that carries this. As long as you can like the tan leathery guy that is a crocodile poacher and is called that by others but never admits to it… a bangin’ score from Peter Best also helped.

As mentioned in my original review, it was wild that this was seen by me as a kid. Besides the trans moments, Dundee talks to prostitutes & goes to a New Wave party, where he sees someone snort cocaine! The film still has laughs, including the iconic “That’s not a knife… THAT’S a knife” scene. Warts and all, the movie is still quite the time capsule of the 1980’s, including the views of New York City. My late mother was a fan of this and its first sequel; both are fine in my eyes. I’ve never viewed the third, due to bad buzz. Perhaps one day, mate…

Oh, and it was wild that a crocodile which appeared in this film (Burt; named after Burt Reynolds!) made the news when he passed away in December. I’m not sure why it has a Wiki page either but still, RIP Burt.

Two More Stooges Shorts

First, How High is Up?

(Short # 48 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

The Stooges could even make taking off a sweater an utter delight. They portray blue-collar workers who live in an old jalopy automobile. It advertises on the back, “If it leaks, we mend it.” After some comedy in fixing their flat tire, a few minutes are spent helping Curly remove his too-tight sweater. Of course it becomes an overly complicated task involving multiple tools. That bit was absurd in the best ways.

Afterwards, they stop at a job site where they put holes into the lunch boxes of workers so they can be fixed. The workers (including Bruce Bennett; more on him at the end) discover their ruse so they run away to the site of a skyscraper being constructed. They are tasked with riveting the beams on the 97th floor, much to their horror. There’s a believable set w/ appropriate backdrop to represent them in their perilous predicament.

As the scenario was classic and there’s some quality one-liners, High was a joy to discuss today. As for Bruce Bennett, he was an Olympian for the United States who won a silver medal in the shot put at the ’28 games. Before High, Bennett appeared as Tarzan in a serial; a few years afterward he would become a performer who had prominent roles in several films people would know today, i.e. Mildred Pierce, The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, the original Angels in the Outfield, etc.

Then, From Nurse to Worse: 

(Short # 49 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

The Stooges commit insurance fraud. Amusingly, they are told by their buddy to perform this scam. Their friend Jerry (I was amused that they used Curly’s real first name for this character) told them to feign that one of them was mentally insane. Of course, Curly was the one chosen, and of course the Stooge who barks like a dog at least once in every short acted like a hound in front of a doctor to feign craziness.

Well, they went to Dr. D. Lerious (those pun names in these shorts are so silly yet they still make me chuckle) and Curly’s act was so effective, the Dr. demands immediate brain surgery! The rest is the trio on the run, which includes the hospital and interactions w/ dog catchers. One wacky scene featured all three Stooges plus two actual canines scratching themselves and each other like they were all pooches.

From Nurse to Worse was fun because they modified some gags and introduced some new ones. The Black actor Dudley Dickerson briefly appeared; that was a highlight as he had a great reaction to a bizarre moment. A hysterical ending made Nurse a very good time.

The Tale of Tsar Saltan

The Tale of Tsar Saltan (Skazka O Tsare Saltane) (1966)

Runtime: 85 minutes

Directed by: Aleksandr Ptushko

Starring: Vladimir Andreyev, Larisa Golubkina, Oleg Vidov, Kseniya Ryabinkina, Sergey Martinson

From: Mosfilm

It was overdue for me to view more from Aleksandr Ptushko, a famed Soviet director little-known in the West. Due to boutique label Deaf Crocodile, in the past I was able to view Ilya Muromets via owning it on Blu and via streaming rental, I’ve also seen the late 50’s Soviet-Finnish film Sampo. Both have had butchered American dubs but those fantasy tales are much better in original form. Dead Crocodile did a swell job presenting those restored movies. The fantasy elements in those included a superman that can rip out tree stumps, a three-headed dragon (no, not King Ghidorah), the Finnish version of the Horn of Plenty, and a witch stealing the sun. Saltan contained more of the same.

Based on the fairy tale from famed Russian writer Alexander Pushkin, it features some familiar themes. The titular Tsar chooses one of three sisters; he picked that one in particular as she promised him a son but it didn’t hurt that many would say her two sisters were much uglier! You shouldn’t feel sympathetic to their plight: the duo plus a few others conspire to have the Tsar’s lady and young son banished while the Tsar is off far-away, fighting troll creatures. 

For a fairy tale, naturally the story should be colorful & magical. Thankfully, it was w/ this lavish production featuring colorful sets & costuming, fantastical characters (there is a Swan Princess, after all), vile villains who get their comeuppance, big special effects for the time, etc. It’s a charming tale told in rhyme… for a fairy tale, such a device is fine with me. It also had a wondrous, lush musical score that complimented the movie perfectly.

Oh, and there’s a singing, dancing squirrel that appears in two scenes!

Nutty but Nice

The short's more like "fine but still funny" in my eyes: 

(Short # 47 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

What an interesting short this was. The Stooges portrayed entertainers in a restaurant who catch the eye of two physicians. Them impressing people with their antics is soitently a rare feat. The pair hire the trio to hopefully lift the spirits of a clinically depressed girl. You see, her banker father was kidnapped by villains who took the bonds he was transporting. This attempt failed; yet, the Stooges attempt to locate the missing father. This is despite them not being given a photograph; instead, they are given a physical description of a few characteristics… plus, he yodels!

The first half is absurd; when the trio dressed as little girls isn’t the oddest plot point… that is OK, as the second half is more traditional. Be that as it may, even before they run into the kidnappers along w/ after, there are funny one-liners, more than one running joke, & the old comedy chestnut of the lights going out on several occasions, resulting in wacky events happening during the blackout and reveals once the lights are turned back on.

It was amusing to see new routines and even the rather unusual moment involving Larry spotlighting his receded hairline. Jerome Howard IRL was sensitive about the Curly haircut but I guess Larry wasn’t as bothered with not having a full head of hair.

Born in China

This is the 2016 Disneynature documentary: 

I return to the world of Disneynature; I’ve viewed some of their offerings in the past: 

Penguins
Bears
Polar Bear

All have nice nature photography out in the wild although the narration seemed designed for children; it doesn’t compare to the BBC Earth documentaries narrated by David Attenborough. Born in China was more of the same, despite the involvement of Shanghai Media Group; yes, I know it’s a state-owned company. My viewing of this is not an endorsement of China’s government the same that my occasional usage of Disney+ and my annual pass to Walt Disney World is not an endorsement of their most unsavory practices, gouging their customers, the overly stringent protection of their copyright, etc.

Anyhow, Born in China follows four different groups of animals: a snow leopard mom & her two cubs, a herd of chiru antelope, a barrelful of golden snub-nosed monkeys, and a giant panda mom/daughter combo. The narration was from… John Krasinski, of all people. As before, the narration was designed for children, and there’s some obviously crafted storylines. No lie, they created a story where a young male monkey named TaoTao rebels against his family by joining THE LOST BOYS, rebels led not by David but rather a leader named (for some reason) Rooster. David would have been better…

I don’t know if my four nephews and niece would like these Disneynature movies. The 12-year-old boys spend a lot of time on their phones, because of course. I don’t know what they view on there… it could be SKIBIDI TOILET for all I know! In any case, no matter your opinion of the narration, the footage of those animals always makes for pleasant viewing. Who wouldn’t be delighted by viewing MeiMei the baby panda get spooked by a falling leaf and take one heck of a tumble down a hill?

It is important to note that unlike typical, one of the animals passes away. The narration then quickly pivoted to discussing for a few minutes the concepts of “the circle of life” and how the Chinese believe in reincarnation… who knows, the youngest could become a bit upset. Otherwise, it should be fine family viewing if you have a family w/ children and everyone’s interested in nature documentaries.

A Plumbing We Will Go

(Short # 46 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

There is certainly nostalgia with my rating; blame it on its presence on a VHS tape purchased by my parents when I was a kid. At the same time, this has near-universal acclaim by fans as one of the best shorts they ever did—I agree. After a stroke of luck in being found innocent of a crime they committed, they ran afoul of the law again. Cop Bud Jamison chases them and after an incident involving a snake oil salesman doing a magician act (he’s seen again at the end), they hijack a plumber’s truck and by a stroke of luck, they stop at a mansion which has a leaky pipe in the basement.

Whether together or separated, they were riotous. Everything went wrong; Moe stayed in the basement while Curly spent some time in an upstairs bathroom, under the belief that this would shut off the water-- Larry went outside to do the same. There was no shortage of sight gags, puns, and destruction throughout. A Plumbing We Will Go was the introduction of Dudley Dickerson, a Black actor who in a later era would have received more work and been better recognized for his talents.

He was spotlighted here as the chef. As the plumbing job went from the sublime to the ridiculous, his reactions to the bedlam were tremendous. It was more than the typical bit part he typically was saddled with. Also a delight was the punchline to the joke involving… a television, then incredibly rare and only something the uber-rich could afford. As the ending was absurd in the best way, Plumbing is a classic that will never grow old.

American Ninja 2: The Confrontation

American Ninja 2: The Confrontation (1987)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Sam Firstenberg

Starring: Michael Dudikoff, Steve James, Larry Poindexter, Gary Conway, Jeff Celentano

From: Cannon

Via Letterboxd discussion in the comments of another film, my finally viewing this gigantic slice of 80’s cheese. There was talk of Steve James and the first two American Ninja pictures. I’ve tackled the first but never the second; that’s despite possessing the knowledge that it has a much more preposterous plot than the original.

Army Rangers Joe Armstrong (Michael Dudikoff) and Curtis Jackson (no, not 50 Cent; James) are sent to a Caribbean island; Marines are present, serving as guard for the American Embassy there. Said Marines begin to go missing, and the culprits… men dressed as ninja. The villain’s endgame: genetic engineering! See what I mean about preposterous?

The action typically is low-grade, especially the martial arts that look amateur compared to the genre efforts from the Pacific Rim region of Asia. Be that as it may, those that like the low-budget American action films from the 80’s stand a chance to be tickled pink by the nonsense presented here. Once you see ninja in their garb attack the titular hero on the beach… actually, you’ll probably realize before that you shouldn’t take this movie seriously but that solidified the opinion.

The tropical setting did look nice. It was filmed in South Africa, which made for a nice location… as long as you ignore the whole APARTHEID thing. It’s unfortunate that Golan-Globus filmed several movies there for that reason. Those much younger than me, I’ll give the super-brief description that it was racial segregation in South Africa so the minority whites always ruled. Dudikoff gets respect from me as American Ninja 3 also filmed in the country and he refused to reprise the part due to his disgust over Apartheid. 

Real-life atrocities aside, it’s a fun movie w/ hysterical 80’s score and an opening which sets the tone: 80’s dudes on Kawasaki sport bikes cruising on mountain roads by the ocean. It was also nice that Black actor Steve James got more to do in this film than the first American Ninja.