Impulse

Impulse (1974)

Runtime: 87 minutes

Directed by: William Grefe

Starring: William Shatner, Jennifer Bishop, Kim Nicholas, Ruth Roman, Harold Sakada

From: Conqueror Films, Inc. 

A wild movie I was glad to finally see in HD quality. Many moons ago I saw this horror/thriller (hopefully no one minds me viewing more of those even though the time of year where I see many of those is barely more than a month away) from the infamous William Grefe even though the quality was best described as “barely better than potato-vision.” William Shatner is a gigolo (!) who wines & dines women for their money, then they die at his hands. This is due to childhood trauma… he walks in on a soldier making out with his mom, soldier assaults her, then child Matt Stone stabs him with the samurai sword the soldier brought over as a souvenir from Japan!

Of course this is a motion picture I’ve wanted to tackle with a better than poor picture. When I randomly discovered yesterday that the print Grindhouse Releasing used for their Blu release is now on the streaming sites… I hopped on that immediately. The crux of the plot: Matt Stone attempts to grift a lady named Ann, but her adolescent daughter sees through his chicanery. Tina is a bratty kid, although thankfully comically so instead of an irritant that drove me batty. I say that about a character who steals money out of her mother’s wallet and hitchhikes with people like Stone. There is Dead Parent Trauma, which is at least some sort of an excuse… both for Matt and Tina. 

Ruth Roman (as Ann’s chatterbox friend) is one of the two other famous names present. The other: Harold Sakata as the ex-con known as KARATE PETE. The reason the viewer knows his name: Pete lives in a Winnebago and has a giant banner on the side stating his name! A scene he has at a car wash truly is one for the ages. There’s plenty to laugh at despite how self-serious Impulse is. Shat’s period fashion sense is always delightful. The acting from him is as spectacular as you would hope. So is a moment early on where it sounded like Shatner let loose a FART and there wasn’t another take done!

People shouldn’t expect something serious from a B-movie where William Shatner portrayed a heartthrob that all the women swoon over. Be that as it may, it was still a sun-baked tale (filmed in & around Tampa, Florida) featuring a Shat performance like no other, plenty of yelling, a dog death-unfortunately-a few shocking moments and occasional lulls aside, was never boring. Thank goodness for Grindhouse Releasing restoring such trash.

The Steel Helmet

The Steel Helmet (1951)

Runtime: 85 minutes

Directed by: Samuel Fuller

Starring: Gene Evans, Robert Hutton, Steve Brodie, James Edwards, Richard Loo

From: Lippert Pictures

Yet another DVR special; while the DVR recording (made off of TCM) was only two months old, Samuel Fuller is a director I should view more of, plus a low-budget war movie but one about the Korean War was different from the norm.

Gene Evans was Sgt. Zack, who escaped a massacre of POW’s due to his titular steel helmet. He meets a South Korean boy who helps him; Zach calls the boy… SHORT ROUND. I had no idea that name was used before. After meeting a Black medic on his own, they join an inexperienced infantry unit. What a crew they were comprised of: various white people (including one that is bald due to childhood scarlet fever), a Black man, a Korean boy, and a Japanese-American. 

As a low-budget effort, Fuller (a veteran of combat himself) did not focus on the heroics and big battle scenes of war. Instead, the plot concerned the trauma of battle and the personal struggles of that motley bunch of soldiers. Both racism and what we now known as PTSD was presented, after all. The anti-war tale presented scenarios that had no easy answers, conflicts between the soldiers themselves where everyone is traumatized by the whole ordeal, and a Sgt. In Zack that has a crotchety exterior but that is to mask a troubled mind. 

The cast is solid overall; this includes everyone from Gene Evans as Zack and Richard Loo as the Japanese-American soldier to Steve Brodie and as Short-Round, William Chun-who only had a brief career. Despite a budget barely over $100,000 and the usage of only a few locations (including Griffith Park in Los Angeles) Samuel Fuller was able to create a compelling treatise on the trauma of combat, filled w/ themes and beliefs that presumably would resonate w/ modern American soldiers today.

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer

Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (1986)

Runtime: 83 minutes

Directed by: John McNaughton

Starring: Michael Rooker, Tom Towles, Tracy Arnold

From: Maljack Productions

F*** the Bears!

Despite knowing of this movie for decades, it wasn’t until last night that I finally pulled the trigger. Its status as a controversial movie that couldn’t find distribution for a few years due to content plus online reviews describing Henry as “a tough watch” meant that it was easy to put off this viewing until the right time.

This follows serial killers Henry and his lackey Otis; I’ve also known for ages that they were loosely based on real-life serial killers Henry Lee Lucas and Ottis Toole. Despite only listening to a few true crime podcasts & viewing a rare related show, it is common knowledge that while Lucas confessed to literally hundreds of murders, he was an attention-seeker once imprisoned and the vast majority of those proclamations were utter hogwash. No one knows for certain how many murders that A-hole actually committed—it might just be a few. Both Lucas and Toole are long since deceased; no tears should be shed for them.

Henry, Otis, and the sister of Otis are followed; all three live together and the trio are all messed-up characters due to the shocking way they were treated as children, told to the audience matter-of-factly as the three talk to each other. The first act, the aftermath of murders are shown, although the images are presented alongside the echoes of what happened—thus, still haunting. After that, the deaths are shown-they are graphic and due to realism, the kills will chill you to the bone.

The viewer is disturbed to see the killers otherwise act like normal human beings in society, whether it be working as an exterminator or eating a burger and fries minutes after snapping necks. This “real” aspect was advertised as being different from the Freddy and Jason films. Not to mention, there are other alarming moments I dare not spoil; one in particular made it clear why the movie was rated X at the time and had to be released unrated a few years after filming concluded. Portrait succeeds as an upsetting film with some horrifying moments; it is one of those that may never be seen again by me…

That said, I’m still glad Portrait was finally tackled by me. What a wild low-budget movie filmed in and around Chicago that was originally planned as a documentary about 1950’s wrestling in Chicago (!) that the producers the Ali brothers plus director John McNaughton couldn’t do after the owner of the wrestling footage suddenly doubled his price… instead the producers wanted a horror movie and instead of a stock slasher, McNaughton brought the documentary vibes and 16mm footage to present a blunt, realistic take on Lucas, who he saw a TV program on. Amazing yet true. The presumption is that that Chicago footage was the matches that were uploaded to YouTube by the Chicago Film Archives.

Of course, Michael Rooker and Tom Towles were great as the leads but Tracy Arnold deserves credit also as Becky, the sister of Otis. Despite only having a few acting credits, she nailed her role. The filmmaking is solid and the interesting score was effective. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer is a raw, visceral experience which won’t be for all viewers; on the other hand, for those that are able to handle such media, the movie is well worth watching… even if only once.

By the way, I saw this on Prime; the runtime listed in the description is incorrect. The print they have is the full movie, in other words.

Many Stooge Shorts

Merry Mavericks: 

(Short # 133 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

This is a Shemp remake of a Curly short; the original was 1943's Phony Express, which probably helps indicate to the reader that both were set in the Wild West. Like in the original, a pair of bankers use a “wanted for vagrancy” poster of the Stooges and proclaim them as new lawmen of the ironically-named Peaceful Gulch in an attempt to fool Red Morgan and his gang of ruffians.

There are humorous moments throughout—for example, the newspaper said they'd “clean up the town” so when the trio wish to sweep the saloon in order to work for a paycheck... the expected misunderstanding. What was strange: there was an inept cowboy hero role that was previously played by Jock Mahoney but instead was portrayed by someone else (Paul Campbell) who even resembled Mahoney-like I said, peculiar.

That said, this was a short I enjoyed more than many Stooge fans, at least judging by ratings elsewhere. This is not a shot-for-shot remake; the second half takes place at a spooky old house where the Stooges guard the money that Morgan's gang is after; they dress up in horror outfits (including a beheaded “Indian Chief”) and while not the best concerning the Stooges and that trope, it was still fine. No, what entertained me were some little moments along with plenty of amusing one-liners.

What killed me was Moe telling Larry not to be scared; he responded that he was apprehensive. Moe demanded an explanation for the word he didn't know. Larry's response? “'Apprehensive' is 'scared' with a college education.” I have to give Merry Mavericks a good rating for that alone.

The Tooth Will Out: 

(Short # 134 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

In my only review for Sunday (I elected to do other things this weekend) I explain how this short was built around a deleted scene from the previous short. Yes, even in this realm there were sometimes deleted scenes. The last one-Merry Mavericks-featured a hysterical scene involving Shemp’s attempts at dentistry gone wrong but there was no room to include that in Mavericks. Instead of never using what was filmed, they built The Tooth Will Out around that footage.

The Stooges are shown as being too inept to work at jobs involving dishes; the expected happens. They literally run into a dentistry school to avoid Emil Sitka from murdering them w/ a meat cleaver (he was the second employer to fire them due to their clumsiness; as a gag, the first time he ran down the street, he cursed as if he was a Rob Zombie character!) and because it was that era’s version of a diploma factory, this was how goofballs like them graduated.

After wackiness involving such items as dentures, they are not so subtlety encouraged to go out West; now came in the deleted footage from Merry Mavericks. That includes the last time that longtime foil Dick Curtis ever appeared in a Stooge short. Their attempts to do dental work on him and another character (portrayed by the greatly-named Slim Gaut) is incredibly loud & chaotic; you can imagine what occurs when Shemp accidentally picks up a book named The Amateur Carpenter. Why was that in a dentist’s office? Who cares!

Despite a conclusion best described as “abrupt,” The Tooth Will Out was still a solid effort which entertained me both for the original footage and the new set-up they created to get us there.

Hula-La-La: 

(Short # 135 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

As silly as you’d expect from “the Stooges are choreographers at a movie studio and they are forced to visit a South Seas island that the studio purchased to teach the cannibalistic headhunting natives to dance for an upcoming film.” The idea of white people purchasing an island full of natives is an ugly reminder of colonialism but Hula was too goofy to be offended by… although this wasn’t the first time that the Stooges visited a Polynesian paradise and the natives worship a Shivu-like figure.

Despite all that and the expected “white people cosplaying as natives” still common in Hollywood-at least Kenneth MacDonald was still able to be an entertaining villain-laughs were to be had. The tropical set was fine and there were chuckles between the one-liners and the presence of an alligator. The highlight: Shivu attacks both Moe (acting like his brother Curly) and Larry as they attempt to steal World War II grenades in a crate left over by American troops. For this being the only Stooge short directed by longtime producer Hugh McCollum: not too shabby although not one of the most memorable efforts either.

What earned the biggest laugh from me: looking online and discovering that the actress who portrayed this Shivu figure was billed as… LEI ALOHA, no lie. They only had a few credits; apparently, they had a bit part in John Ford’s The Hurricane. Lei Aloha sounds like the name that J.K. Rowling would give a Hawaiian character!

Pest Man Wins: 

(Short # 136 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

Another Shemp short that is a remake of one years earlier during the Curly era. In this case, it was 1936’s Ants in the Pantry, where the trio have the blue-collar jobs of “pest exterminators” and they plant pests in a mansion for the purpose of earning a paycheck. Pantry was one viewed often as a kid as it was on a VHS tape my parents purchased for me. The stock footage from Ants that was used here was instantly recognizable to my eyes.

While there are lines and scenes that are copied, Pest isn’t a shot-for-shot remake. Pest was riotous with the changes made to make it fit Shemp instead of Curly and the inclusion of a pie fight which was mostly stock footage from other shorts. Instead of feeling hackneyed, this combination was still appealing to me. Funny one-liners and the appearances of such supporting players like Vernon Dent and Emil Sitka is always an asset.

A Missed Fortune: 

(Short # 137 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

Yep, yet another Shemp remake of a Curly short… in this case, 1938’s Healthy, Wealthy, and Dumb. That featured Curly winning money in a contest and the boys live the high life, only to experience complications… especially those darn taxes. The plot is rather similar in A Missed Fortune; the beginning is still Howard, Fine, & Howard eating hotcakes and a mishap happens concerning glue, although the routine is changed a bit and the contest Shemp wins is different.

They still visit the Hotel Costa Plente and wreck the room. This includes the inevitability of them and the audience learning that something both fragile and costly is near them, which has been seen by me plenty of times this year. There’s still the trio of gold-digging women who have a monkey named Darwin, there are similar or even the same jokes, and a bit of stock footage from Dumb.

The uncomfortable truth is that for the rest of my run of viewing these Stooge shorts, there will be remakes of the Curly era, later Shemp efforts that remake early Shemp efforts (complete with some or a lot of stock footage), and then there’s the Joe Besser era which has more remakes plus some bizarre entries featuring talking horses or aliens… I’ll still rate those fairly and through a mix of good & bad, I’ll still miss doing these once I complete the final 60+ shorts.

Listen, Judge: 

(Short # 138 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

This took elements of three different Curly shorts; they had a run-in w/ Vernon Dent, causing anger on his part and of course in the finale he unexpectedly meets them again, causing disaster as they attempt to prepare dinner. That is taken from 1941’s An Ache in Every Stake. Here, Dent is the titular judge; they have the blue-collar job of “handymen” and they run out of the courtroom after a mishap involving a stolen chicken. That’s from A Plumbing We Will Go.

They then wander around a fancy neighborhood & discover a house whose doorbell is out of order. That is as destructive as when they attempted the same task in 1943’s They Stooge to Conga. Some moments are copied but they usually are modified a bit so this effort did not seem like a needless retread. Combining those two old plots with a plot point from a third was also interesting, even if Ache. Conga, & Plumbing are even better than Judge. They even subvert a gag sometimes used through their history. The new moments include a great moment involving electrocution.

Besides Emil Sitka as the chef who quits due to frustration w/ Moe, John Hamilton had a small role. Hamilton had roles big and small in Hollywood for like 20 years by this point, usually as a judge, cop, or attorney. Hardcore fans of 50’s television will know him as Perry White in the George Reeves Superman TV show my father watched as a kid.

I Know What You Did Last Summer (The New Movie)

I Know What You Did Last Summer (2025)

39% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 127 reviews) 

Runtime: 111 minutes

Directed by: Jennifer Kaytin Robinson

Starring: Some legacy characters, plus the likes of Chase Sui Wonders, Madelyn Cline, Jonah Hauer-King, Sarah Pidgeon & Tyriq Weathers

From: Columbia

I’d be like my Letterboxd mutual & refer to this as I Know What You MID Last Summer, except that I always found the ’97 original and ’98 sequel to be silly, dumb, & only OK. Henceforth, this legacy sequel being more of the same (albeit in sometimes different ways) is not something too risible to me. The obligation to use my AMC A-List app + the lack of interesting options for me now was a reason why the theatrical journey was made to view something where the expectations weren’t sky-high.

I was delighted to see some familiar faces I saw act in the late 90’s during my teen years. It was unacceptable that some shamed Jennifer Love Hewitt’s appearance; of course she doesn’t look like a teenager anymore… she’s a 46-year-old mother. Many at least voiced their displeasure over those cruel jabs. Undoubtedly, I’ve deteriorated since my teen years! Unlike me, she still looks great.

As for this new film, the general premise is the same… goofy young adults cause an accident + death during the summer; the next summer someone gets revenge. Of course, this was “inspired” by the new Scream films so Julie James and Ray Bronson return as their characters from the massacres they survived. Note that this film is really dumb at times: a rich family moves to the blue-collar town of Southport and because the patriarch “scrubbed off the Internet” the ’97 massacre, that area is now “The Hamptons of the South!”

There are other logical fallacies, a villain reveal questionably executed, kills that except for one won’t thrill the veteran slasher fans, and the young women in the cast are focused on far more than the young men-not everyone will like that. Series fans may take umbrage against this new movie because (redacted) but most everything was competent-whether in front or behind the camera, aside from some dodgy acting-this sequel was watchable and most importantly for me, was something that made me groan once or twice but otherwise did not make me angry.

Plus, as a middle-aged dude, it appeared as if they made fun of Gen Z and their lingo, which was fine with me… no offense to my followers! For certain, they skewered the worst people in the true crime podcast universe; some will approve that not only was a major character shown to be bi (and has a particular kink also) but that many key roles in this production were filled by women. Of course, there’s the expected fan service moments, including THE LINE… I understand the advertising has spoiled that; most probably assumed she’d say it.

Many might be disappointed; me, I don’t use words like “mid;” instead, “middling” is what I’ll proclaim. Before the film, it was learned by me that there’s a mid-credits scene; correct, and it is one worth sticking around for.

Clash by Night

Clash by Night (1952)

Runtime: 105 minutes

Directed by: Fritz Lang

Starring: Barbara Stanwyck, Paul Douglas, Robert Ryan, Marilyn Monroe, J. Carrol Naish

From: RKO

A Fritz Lang noir starring Barbara Stanwyck, Robert Ryan, and Marilyn Monroe? Yes, please. I viewed this early yesterday evening, via Turner Classic Movies on Stanwyck’s birthday. Clash by Night is regrettably an example of a film noir (technically, a noir-tinged tale) filled w/ mostly awful men but thankfully the women shine even better, those poor suffering dames.

The life in Monterey, California & its status as a fishing city is established in the beginning, from the boats to the canneries to everything else. Stanwyck is Mae, returning to the city after a failed life out East. Her lout brother is dating Monroe; despite striking the jackpot there, he is an abusive SOB. Mae enters a relationship of convenience w/ Paul Douglas, a salt-of-the-earth fisherman who isn’t the most compatible and he has a dark underside… then there’s Paul’s buddy Robert Ryan-amusingly, a film projectionist-a particularly detestable person that often rants against women, is a drunk, and does a horrendously offensive impression of a Chinese person. Yet, both are lost souls so that’s the attraction in a love-hate relationship.

You may grow too frustrated with the sorrow these women endure; Babs can’t easily leave Douglas due to the little matter that they had a kid together. I was still invested for several reasons: the characters, Stanwyck delivering the best performance, Monroe’s natural presence (this helped mask acting limitations or how apparently, she at least sometimes required multiple takes), the Monterey setting well-realized-especially the rocky portion of the beach, the waves crashing against it-the acres of memorable dialogue and Lang’s direction, which included some tremendous moments w/ the camera.

While I didn’t always love Clash by Night, it was well-made and presented some interesting themes, especially for the early 50’s.

Hard Boiled (The 4K Restoration)

So, last night I rented the new 4K UHD stream of Hard Boiled. It was on other platforms but just yesterday I saw it available on Amazon. The first time I reviewed Hard Boiled was February of ’23; I explained my foolishness for thinking that The Killer (a great movie in its own right) was better, proclaimed how the second half was incredible & at the end, hoped that a proper restoration was done one day so people didn’t have to resort to YouTube or DVD for a lesser print of an all-timer action classic.

I can assuage fears or concerns that the 4K restoration process would go awry, via obvious DNR, AI disorder, or other complications. While I of course have never viewed an original 35mm print of Hard Boiled, it looks far better than I’d ever seen before; it on 4K UHD disc in the future would be sublime. Note that on Amazon, the default audio is English… BUT hitting “pause” and then hitting the down arrow on your remote to the “Audio Options” will allow you to change it to the original Cantonese language.

To copy and paste part of what I wrote in February, 2023:

“Long ago I viewed this motion picture for the first time; for reasons now not even known to me, I preferred The Killer so I waited so many years for a revisit. Turns out, I was a complete fool. As for 5 star ratings, I am personally stingy with them due to preference. This is a movie I could nitpick if I wanted to; however, I won't and as the second half is so masterfully done and was far more glorious than I had recalled, might as well give the film credit for that.

Instead of focusing on the underworld, John Woo wanted to make heroes out of police officers. The legendary Chow Yun-Fat played “Tequila;” imagine Dirty Harry if he played clarinet in a jazz band. Along with an undercover cop, they attempt to stop an upstart in “The Syndicate” along with his associates, including an appropriately named Mad Dog. The first half is pretty rad as there are great action beats to go along with the pathos and drama.

However, the second half raises all the stakes even higher than you can imagine. It's all OOT between character behaviors, the tragedy, the babies (oh yes, the final hour is entirely set in a hospital), the violence, the thousands of bullets fired, all the epic moments... it is like the thrill I still get when watching large stretches of other classics like Aliens or T2. Of course, everything revolving around one baby in particular is ludicrous but I'm sure that was the intention so might as well laugh along with the movie, right?

Perhaps it's how many movies in the 21st century (especially in the action genre) leave me wanting more or are just disappointing when it comes to those beats, but getting to see all the time and effort in putting together those astounding thrills and beats that still are effective…”

Much to my relief, besides Hard Boiled never looking better, the movie itself is still an incredible experience. What a cast; of course, Tony Leung and Chow Yun-Fat shone brightest. Last time, I lamented how Woo and Yun-Fat weren’t utilized properly by Hollywood. Perhaps that’s unfair-both had good or better films in Hollywood-although there was also dreck. Other foreign talent didn’t even have the luxury of decent American films.

In 2025, the operatic ballet of bloodshed, gunshots propelling people feet back, melodrama, and yes, thousands of bullets being shot—while I’m saddened that in the history of film there have been far too few epic action thrillers that could even come close to the majesty of all the gun-fu, the explosions, the memorable characters-I now appreciate the henchman Mad Dog more than before-and the interesting score (in this case, jazz-infused)… I’m glad that an all-timer action film finally has been properly restored for people to visit or revisit in the future.

Mandalay

Mandalay (1934)

Runtime: Only 65 minutes

Directed by: Michael Curtiz

Starring: Kay Francis, Ricardo Cortez,  Warner Oland, Lyle Talbot, Reginald Owen

From: Warner Bros.

About time I viewed something recorded off the DVR this past January, right? Truth be told, there are recordings from last year still waiting to be tackled... one day. TCM played this as part of a marathon of Kay Francis on her birthday; Mandalay was selected as it had an exotic-sounding plot set in what was then known as Burma, now known as Myanmar. I've enjoyed Francis in the few flicks I'd seen her in before; the same hold true here.

Besides looking ravishing in a number of Orry-Kelly gowns, her performance was a highlight. Tanya-a former resident of Russia-is hooked up w/ Ricardo Cortez, a shady dude doing shady things across the world. They are in the city formerly known as Rangoon but he's such a slime bucket, Kay is abandoned and left with an even bigger slime bucket in Warner Oland, running a nightclub. It's heavily implied that she is forced to do more than just sing... no wonder she escapes on a riverboat to the title city, meeting with alcoholic doctor Lyle Talbot, a fellow broken spirited individual.

Yes, this is a melodrama, yes there's a love triangle, and yes the woman in the relationship is forced to do something bold due to the circumstances; this happened more in 30's movies than I first realized. Familiarity aside, Mandalay was still a pretty good time. The colonial implications notwithstanding, the exotic allure of various individuals (at least some skirting the law, if not outright breaking it) congregating in an intoxicating location far-flung from the West can be delightful, as it was here.

There were various other names that I knew from previous movies or at least recognized... Etienne Girardot, Reginald Owen, Lucien Littlefield. To reiterate, Kay Francis was the star & she shone bright as she had to express various emotions throughout & did it superbly. Director Michael Curtiz was another key asset; if not for them, Mandalay would have been a random B movie that had a few amusing side characters but otherwise it'd have been long-forgotten by most. Instead, this was fine entertainment that is only a 65 minute time commit for the viewer.

The Stone Tape

The Stone Tape (1972)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Peter Sasdy

Starring: Michael Bryant, Jane Asher, Iain Cuthbertson, Michael Bates, Reginald Marsh

From: BBC

An interesting BBC horror/sci-fi movie, this was.

After a weekend where I was out & about (including attending an Orlando SC soccer match Saturday night; I’ll give details on that at the end for anyone interested) I felt like using my Shudder account; an old BBC production I’ve known of for ages was selected. This was one of their spooky programs the channel always showed on Christmas night. The film was so effective-at least at the time-that the supernatural phenomenon depicted here is now known by paranormal investigators as the Stone Tape Theory.

The premise is unique: an electronics company rents an old Victorian home for usage as a research lab… so they can create a new recording medium “to put the boots to old Nippon,” i.e. “Create something to beat the Japanese in the electronics field.” From Wiki, I understand that the BBC used to own a mansion that was used by its R&D team. A woman (yeah, some attitudes of its time was present; there’s also some unfortunate bigotry against the Japanese straight out of World War II propaganda) spots a ghost in a room formerly boarded up.

To echo what others have stated, a nice change to the formula is that the story isn’t “no one else believes that this person saw a ghost or another form of apparition.” Rather, by the end of the first act, it’s accepted and the team now uses its awesome early 70’s tech to try and capture it. However, there are complications; when only some can feel or see the ghost & its presence… I won’t reveal more or why the film is entitled “The Stone Tape.” 

As I’ve said for some other 70’s productions, its methodical pacing isn’t for all modern tastes. However, the combination of period fashion, period tech, different premise, occasional electronic score, and lo-fi special effects won me over. The cast was fine in general; I’ll spotlight Jane Asher as Jill. She-a great computer programmer-is the lone woman present not doing menial work; she both receives sexist treatment and is gaslit by her dumb male coworkers. Thus, the movie’s spotlighted around her and Ms. Asher did a swell job.

For many, hopefully you’ll at least like this analog production; the echoes of Prince of Darkness I understand were deliberate on Carpenter’s part. As for the Orlando SC match I saw on Saturday night, they played to a 1-1 draw against CF Montreal, a bad team they should have beat. No matter, it was still a fun time and my return to Orlando’s great stadium should have happened years ago. Like in the association football (or futbol or whatever name you call the sport) of elsewhere, there are supporters who chant, bang the drum all day, and wave their banners about. Don’t worry, there aren’t any hooligans about who start riots or throw lit flares on the pitch!

The Deep

The Deep (1977)

Runtime: 124 minutes

Directed by: Peter Yates

Starring: Nick Nolte, Jacqueline Bisset, Robert Shaw, Louis Gossett, Jr., Eli Wallach

From: Columbia 

There’s a scene featuring cricket. I mention that as someone I follow on Letterboxd has been viewing films which have at least one scene containing the sport. It’s background to a scene of two key characters conversating w/ each other; whether or not they’ve interested in a viewing just for that reason…

As for The Deep, it was a movie my late mother enjoyed! She passed away this month 5 years ago; no, not because of COVID but rather due to an illness she had since the start of 2020. As many know this for an infamously gratuitous moment involving Jacqueline Bisset, there may be surprise that she was a fan. While I don’t know for certain, the presumption is “it was an aquatic adventure in a scenic location from the guy that wrote Jaws and Robert Shaw played a key role.”

The opening was lovely—Nick Nolte & Jacqueline Bisset diving underwater in Bermuda, a lovely John Barry score in the background, many lovely sights to see. That includes… Bisset obviously diving underwater in only a white t-shirt and no bra! How shameless that was—that is what sticks out by modern standards, no pun intended. A shame that due to the era, she was endangered more than once-still, at least her character did contribute at times. Bisset did a swell job in the part.

She and Nolte were a couple vacationing in Bermuda who discovered something that may be treasure but of course there are rivals; this includes Lou Gossett, Jr. in an ominous part as a Haitian. Nolte wasn’t quite the grumpy Nick Nolte we all expect, although he still did some yelling. Shaw, though… the echoes of Quint were unconcealed and that character gave no F’s, even when it came to voodoo and well, something bad happens to a cat, unfortunately.

A common complaint is that The Deep is “boring;” I won’t argue with anyone who feels that way. However, movies like that usually aren’t boring in my eyes as long as interesting elements were present. I never wavered in my interest due to the cast which had other familiar faces (Robert Tessier, Eli Wallach, Mr. Universe turned wrestler turned actor on rare occasions Earl Maynard), stunning views of Bermuda, and of course the copious amounts of underwater footage, filmed in that area, the British Virgin Islands, and even Australia. It still looks great today.

Others won’t find the film as interesting as me; I was entertained despite the measured pacing. The movie was a big hit at the time and even had a theme song from Donna Summer. The Deep didn’t resonate in people’s minds like a big hit yet my mom was a fan. A shame on my part that I never gave The Deep a shot while she was alive so discussion could be had w/ her. Randomly, the movie has been on the Criterion Channel for awhile now, which is how I went on a pleasant journey to Bermuda.

 

Jason and the Argonauts

Jason and the Argonauts (1963)

Runtime: 104 minutes

Directed by: Don Chaffey

Starring: Todd Armstrong, Nancy Kovack, Gary Raymond, Laurence Naismith, Niall MacGinnis

From: Columbia

A movie I had seen before… during my high school years, meaning “over a quarter-century ago.” Like with probably many, the dominant memory is the legendary Ray Harryhausen stop-motion effects finale where the titular heroes do battle with sword-wielding skeletons, a moment paid homage to countless times in the 60+ years since. It is rather loosely based on the ancient Greek poem The Argonautica but as I am not a devotee of such classical tales, the bastardization of those stories isn’t particularly offensive.

It's the sort of tale as old as time: an adventure where a villain slays the king of a land; a prophecy foretells that the king’s infant son Jason will overthrow that tyrant. Meanwhile, he meets Zeus, Hera, and the other Greek gods as he goes to the ends of the Earth to locate the Golden Fleece, a key item in eradicating the villain Pelias. Via competition he found such figures as Hercules, Hylas, and Acastus to join the crew on the epic voyage. 

Jason and the Argonauts was a rousing adventure, buttressed by a bold, confident score from Bernard Herrmann that ironically for the composer of the Psycho score contained no stringed instruments, solid direction, and attractive cast of tanned men & women in exotic locations dealing with a variety of different threats.

Of course, it’s the Harryhausen effects that are still the most memorable aspect; regrettably, even in the late 90’s, some in my age group poo-pooed and dismissed those effects. While those and the other practical moments of the past may look “dated” to people in 2025, they are still rad in my eyes. The knowledge that the art of stop-motion is a time-consuming, difficult art—that may color my opinion but I hope there’s never a time where people of all ages aren’t able to be enthralled by stop-motion animation.

I could quibble about some narrative decisions, acting and dialogue that isn't always stellar, or a final scene that felt abrupt; those points duly noted, Jason and the Argonauts was still a pretty good time and was as much fun as during my teen years.

True Grit (The Remake)

True Grit (2010)

Runtime: 110 minutes

Directed by: The Brothers Coen

Starring: A quality cast, including Hailee Steinfeld… the reason why I saw the film

From: Paramount/Skydance Media

Another review done via request. Way back in late April, I was blessed w/ the good fortune of viewing a 70mm presentation of Sinners. In that review (which I’m glad is one of my most popular on Letterboxd) which received more than a few comments, one person noted how I should check out the True Grit remake after reading that I had only seen Hailee Steinfeld in Sinners. As I have viewed the original True Grit back four summers ago, no excuse for me to not finally give the movie a shot.

Turns out, it was better than the original. It can be argued whether John Wayne or Jeff Bridges was better as Rooster Cogburn, not to mention Glen Campbell or Matt Damon as Le Boeuf the Texas Ranger. However, Steinfeld certainly was better than Kim Darby as little Mattie Ross, hiring U.S. Marshal Cogburn to track down Tom Chaney, the rapscallion that murdered her father.

The cast as a whole does a swell job, whether it be Bridges, Damon, Barry Pepper, Josh Brolin, etc. However, it was neophyte actor Steinfeld who most impressed, especially for a feature film debut. She made the bold, confident Mattie a believable character. 15 years after the fact, I probably don’t need to extol the virtues of the direction, the score from Carter Burwell, the Roger Deakins cinematography, the New Mexico/Texas scenery that represented the Arkansas/Indian Territory of 1878.

Remakes-especially ones made in the 21st century-typically are rejected wholesale; thankfully, this version of True Grit was not only worthwhile and an improvement on the original film, it is a rare 21st century Western that isn’t a lousy B-movie & can be enjoyed by fans of classic genre efforts of decades past.

A Quintet of Stooge Shorts

A Snitch in Time: 

(Short # 128 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

The most violent of the Shemp era, this is a common refrain. Of course they haven’t all been viewed yet; today, it can be stated that Moe suffers plenty of abuse throughout.

Their blue-collar job this time: carpenters. Some moments from the Curly era were brought back here but they still made me chuckle. In the opening minutes alone, Moe gets wood glue on his hands… and in his eye. Then, both his face & and his butt are sent into a giant table saw! They make furniture for a Miss Scudder; as they deliver said furniture-which to their credit doesn’t fall apart-so does three new boarders, who are thieves.

Them blundering their way through the job then later succeeding is nothing new, either—again, not a demerit when they did almost 200 shorts. What they presented felt fresh. The “tough” of the criminal trio looked like a pro wrestler and had a voice like he garbled razor wire like an old pro wrestler—thus, I wasn’t shocked when it was learned that Henry Kulky actually WAS a pro wrestler, competing under various versions of the name Bomber Kulkovich. 

Feeling fresh is important to me as I go through those almost 200 shorts; thankfully, A Snitch in Time saved nine… er, fulfilled that task, I mean.

Three Arabian Nuts: 

(Short # 129 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

An actual genie is part of this short. The blue-collar job the boys have this time: “employees of a warehouse.” Vernon Dent wishes for his treasures that he had shipped over to the warehouse to be treated delicately; instead, plenty of crashing sound effects are heard throughout. A stereotypical lamp is part of the collection; Larry and Shemp discover the genie, although Moe doesn’t so he’s naturally skeptical.

Yes, it isn’t great that the genie is called AMOS because he’s Black and he utters the phrase “I’ll be your slave.” White people cosplaying as Arabs is expected for the era; as for white people taking items from other cultures, that can always be questioned… in this case, they framed it as “those villains want the lamp solely for the genie” rather than “they want those Arabic treasures back in their homeland.”

Nuts is yet another Shemp short featuring a climax where the trio run away from their foes; thankfully, the way it was done here still made it feel not stale or hackneyed. While I don’t love this as much as some-or more than some-Stooge fans, Arabian is still a very good time featuring enough of what I want… from one-liners (including one from Larry in the conclusion that had me rolling) to the silliness of Shemp referring to the genie as “genius” because he doesn’t know the correct word.

Baby Sitters Jitters: 

(Short # 130 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

Standing on your head will always quiet a crying child. They’re babysitters; that is as disastrous as expected. Some gags are reminiscent of the times in the Curly era when they dealt w/ little kids; that isn’t always a bad thing, although it was a shock that they repeated the gag of a toddler with a LOADED GUN.

The boys need cash to avoid being kicked out of their apartment for rent past due; via a manual from a “Davenport Seats” they attempt to take care of said toddler, who notes that her estranged husband has been given her problems. Of course, George the husband kidnaps Junior and they become involved w/ that domestic squabble.

It wasn’t my favorite of the Shemp era; at the same time, them abusing each other was still amusing, Shemp being functionally illiterate here resulted in a debacle when attempting to make soup, and Larry gets to do more than usual. The ending sort of fell flat yet overall, the running gag of Shemp (or others) standing on their head to stop someone from crying not only is the most noteworthy moment of Jitters, the joke is comical.

Don't Throw That Knife: 

(Short # 131 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

“Any resemblance between The Three Stooges and regular human beings, whether living or dead, is a dirty shame.”

This is the refrain which opened Don’t Throw That Knife, another fine Shemp-era short that I wasn’t expecting to view then review also on Sunday, July 6. However, all through July I’ve been busy w/ various activities and my initial plan of viewing two feature-length pictures on this day is one I ultimately won’t do; catching up on other things instead was better for this lazy Sunday. Expect a feature film review sometime tomorrow evening, even if a little later than usual.

Knife had some familiar beats as like in No Census, No Feeling, Knife featured the Stooges in that occupation. This time, the short only featured two other actors (Jean Willes and Dick Curtis, both veterans in this universe); Curtis and Willes are a husband-and-wife magician duo; the husband is “insanely jealous,” which is a plot point that hasn’t aged well given the rise of discourse concerning both domestic violence and abusive spouses.

Regardless, the trio attempt to avoid detection once Curtis returns to his apartment. The conclusion was rather juvenile but overall this was still fine, whether using new or modified bits. For example, if anyone was ever pondering how the Stooges would react to funhouse mirrors… as flawed and derivative as Knife would be, there were enough smirk-worthy moments where I can proclaim that this was good.

Scrambled Brains: 

(Short # 132 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges) 

An inspiration for Shallow Hal? While Stooge fans Bobby & Peter Farrelly did not write the script for that film, the author of that screenplay (Sean Moynihan) could have taken the most memorable plot point from Scrambled Brains: Shemp is in a sanitarium but is about to be released. The gag is that he’s still mentally unwell-yeah, mental health is treated far differently now over 70 years later-and Nora the nurse is a middle-aged lady missing many teeth but Shemp sees her as a rather attractive young blonde.

While it’s an outdated look at such things, perhaps the idea that Moe & Larry can’t keep him at the sanitarium due to the high cost is still relevant today… while it is rather bizarre that a little girl lives with the Stooges and there’s no explanation as to who is the father-her presence is to provide a gag involving a doll-otherwise this was rather entertaining.

Shemp has trouble swallowing pills, his hallucinations manifest themselves while playing the piano, Emil Sitka portrays a doctor named Gesuntheit, and in the highlight, a great moment is Vernon Dent stuck in a phone booth w/ the trio, where they beat each other up. Scrambled Brains was one of Larry’s favorites; besides him being allowed to do a bit more than usual, the short was a lot of fun.

Buddha's Palm

Buddha’s Palm (Ru Lai Shen Zhang) (1982)

Runtime: 97 mesmerizing minutes

Directed by: Taylor Wong

Starring: Derek Tung-Sing Yee, On-On Yu, Kara Ying Hung Wai, Alex Man, Lo Lieh

From: Shaw Brothers

Featuring: CUCKOLD KUNG FU, dragons named Dopey, animated effects shooting from hands, multiple narrators that are never identified, swastika fireballs, lightsabers, an important character that always announces his (fashionably late) arrival, boils that shoot out acid, moments ripped off later in Big Trouble in Little China, and more.

For those that enjoy the WTF nature of the legendary The Boxer’s Omen, Buddha’s Palm (also from Shaw Brothers) is on the same street. Note that Omen is more coherent than Palm, relatively speaking. I couldn’t really tell you what was going on in Buddha’s Palm but perhaps that was by design. Notwithstanding, I was perversely entertained by the spectacle that played in front of my eyes via Arrow’s streaming service.

This has characters w/ names like Blazing Cloud Mad God and items w/ such names as Ever-Faceted Pearl Orchid. If a plot description must be given… a mediocre dude in a menial job suddenly is trained by a long dormant God in a world full of Gods who have supernatural powers and train human disciples to use those powers. Our hero encounters both people he’ll befriend along with various enemies.

I dare not give away the rest of the bugnuts insanity on display in Buddha’s Palm; people may not believe me anyhow. As you’d expect from Shaw, the sets were immaculate, the action crisp & well-choreographed. What was unexpected: a score that usually sounded like one “inspired” by Isao Tomita; that is meant as a compliment as it was a rather pleasant electronic score which managed to work for this setting.

Buddha’s Palm is a must for those that love the bonkers, outrageous martial arts movies.

M3GAN 2.0

M3GAN 2.0 (2025)

57% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 204 reviews) 

Runtime: A full two hours

Directed by: Gerald Johnstone

Starring: The returning cast members, plus the likes of Ivanna Sakhno, Aristotle Athari & Jermaine Clement

From: Universal/Blumhouse/Atomic Monster 

If they HAD to make a sequel, at least it wasn't a rehash of the original. That is my opinion of M3GAN 2.0. The OG M3GAN was silly yet rather entertaining in its tale of an AI doll gone wrong as a tech aunt just doesn't know how to raise her little niece. Social media (in particular TikTok) loved the title character, her wacky dancing, and her sarcastic dialogue. Theatrical audiences don't feel the same now; it is 2 1/2 years later & releasing in the summer rather that in the doldrums of January like the original also played a factor.

While watching the film, how ludicrous the plot was: obvious. Further scrutiny would beyond question make the story look even worse. Be that as it may, this tale of M3GAN tech's usage in the creation of a military weapon known as AMELIA which of course goes awry which of course requires an upgraded M3GAN to combat the threat... Terminator 2: Judgment Day was an obvious inspiration; more surprising to me was the references to a certain disgraced action star of the past along with other nostalgia points from my childhood.

The bold idea to make 2.0 a sci-fi action-thriller w/ few horror elements and some comedy when horror-comedy-science fiction was the first's genres: if not always successful, the decision to not make a Xerox (or Xenox in this film's universe) copy but instead change genres and create a big plot w/ end-of-the-world stakes was at least an inspired one. It was even low-budget, at least by modern standards. The action & the modern way it was filmed: not spectacular yet not terrible either. The cast was fine although Jermaine Clement as the billionaire tech bro was the funniest character.

Not a surprise that the reception to this film was as mixed as the first, despite the bountiful amount of differences between the two. As much of a dumb modern movie as M3GAN 2.0 is, somehow I was able to laugh along with it and 2.0 was enjoyable poppycock.

BloodRayne

BloodRayne (2005)

Runtime: 91 minutes

Directed by: Uwe Boll

Starring: A cast full of famous faces who I hope were paid well

From: Several different companies

RIP Michael Madsen

I realize how inappropriate it is to pay tribute to a popular actor in cinephile circles by discussing an Uwe Boll film. That said, Madsen spent most of his career in the world of B-movies, I’ve reviewed Reservoir Dogs before (his performances was a key component of making that so memorable) and long ago, I actually saw BloodRayne—not that more than a scene or two were remembered. Plus, what a madman Boll is. At the end I’ll say more about that crazy German. Regrettably, Madsen looked like he did NOT want to be there. With any luck, he and all the other famous faces at least enjoyed being in Romania.

BloodRayne was one of those movies from Boll loosely adapted from a videogame and financed due to loopholes in German tax laws that were closed soon after this picture was released. Kristanna Loken is a dhampir; around here, explaining that she is half-vampire/half-human probably isn’t necessary. The particulars of the plot aren’t necessary either-it is nonsense. Note that Boll took the first draft (yes, first draft) of a script that Guinevere Turner-yes, of American Psycho fame-wrote and filmed that. Of course, the finished product was far different than the script. Unfortunately, the plot progression is best described as “lurching forward” mixed w/ general incoherence and an amazingly bad final act. Despite some funny moments & bloody gore, the overall experience isn’t great.

I hope that the likes of Madsen, Loken, Michelle Rodriguez, Udo Kier, Ben Kingsley (naturally, he was the villain), Geraldine Chaplin, Meat Loaf (who delivered the only deliberately campy performance) and Billy Zane were paid well. The performances in general are best described as “phoning it in” or “only OK at best, probably due to inexperience.” Yes, Meat Loaf’s wig was the most guffaw-worthy, although the ones that Madsen and Zane donned were also a riot.

Ultimately, Bloodrayne also looked/felt cheap so the sets that looked OK were a nonstarter for my appreciation for the picture. There are worse/funnier Boll movies out there, and the same goes for Michael Madsen movies with the addition of actual good films. Godspeed to Mr. Madsen; there are gems out there waiting to be discovered. Possibly one day…

There likely aren’t that many gems from Uwe Boll out there; yet, I can’t hate the man. He isn’t great at his job yet he became infamous for being so antagonistic against his (many) critics, he once fought against some of them in boxing matches! His wild, brash personality still amuses me… not enough to see more of his movies when more than one was SO bad they couldn’t even be finished and none I would even call “good,” mind you. For certain, neither sequel to BloodRayne will ever be tackled by me-those are allegedly even worse.

Frogs

Frogs (1972)

Runtime: 91 minutes

Directed by: George McCowan

Starring: Ray Milland, Sam Elliott, Joan Van Ark, Adam Roarke, Judy Pace

From: AIP

The 4th of July setting was the main reason why the film was watched last night. To explain fully, yesterday afternoon I was participating in a YouTube stream when someone else brought up this motion picture and how it was appropriate for the holiday. As Frogs is yet another one I’ve known of for years and the cast featured several familiar names (Joan Van Ark, Ray Milland, Sam Elliott sans mustache), why not view some eco-horror last night?

Elliott is a freelance photographer doing a piece on pollution. He meets the rich Crockett family, who just love polluting the environment. At first I thought it mainly the fault of Milland’s character, the irritable patriarch of the family… then I realized that they’re all rotten people, totally dysfunctional. No wonder his Jason Crockett is ill-tempered. Nature decides to get revenge on that A-hole family-Ray even calls him & his family “the ugly rich.” To steal a line from a mutual, the other family members wish that Jason… would croak.

Frogs has a mixed reception; I get it. There are many different species that do the attacking, and the biggest role those amphibians had was “their croaking is constant background noise and there are many shots of them sitting or moving about.” Of course, more than a few people will be steamed that a movie entitled “Frogs” doesn’t have killer frogs. Why hasn’t there been a killer frog movie? Seems like a missed opportunity.

The first half is methodically-paced; some find it “slow” which is valid, although they usually don’t bother me that much & it didn’t here. Present is decent atmosphere-especially at night-and is filmed in a lovely part of rural Florida… the panhandle, to be exact, which is more like the Deep South than the palm tree area of Florida I am a resident of.

Ultimately, I was won over by the combination of a soundtrack full of “electronic sound effects,” the period fashion, the swampy setting, the abundance of different animals, the enveloping atmosphere, and low-budget AIP charm. Many won’t be won over by that and in fact will feel this is disappointing; I can’t argue with that opposing viewpoint.