Rocky V (1990)
Runtime: 104 minutes
Directed by: John G. Avildsen
Starring: Oh, you know who is in this by now
From: United Artists
You know, Tommy Morrison's real life story was FAR more interesting than this film.
Thank goodness for Rocky Balboa then later the Creed movies-no one would want this to be the last appearance of an iconic character as V just isn't too good and even Sly has later regretted making this film. The idea of Balboa having a fall from grace and/or him becoming a manager like Mickey is not automatically a bad one, but the way it was done here just did not work. There have been a plethora of cases where athletes have become rich but they either squandered their cash or someone ripped them off so this idea is a valid one... how it's done here isn't all that believable and personally, I thought that robot alone would be enough to get them out of debt...
The fact that this starts right after Rocky IV not only hurts the story when it comes to logic, the timeline is also screwed up as Rocky Jr. is suddenly years older than he was in the last film. As for Rocky Jr.'s storyline, all it did was make Rocky Sr. look like a jerk and a goofus for ignoring Jr. and instead focusing on the bland character that was Tommy Gunn. As already alluded to, the time that real life boxer Tommy Morrison (who portrayed Gunn) spent on Earth ended up being far more intriguing and actually more cinematic than the role he played here... Morrison's career wasn't what it could have been as he spent too much time skirt chasing and partying and well, he got AIDS... which he later denied having but of course that is what he died of. Gunn is just a dork who was seduced by Don King... er I mean “George Washington Duke”, a promoter that made King look subtle in comparison. And the ending of V is different, but that is about the only compliment I can give it.
Sly getting to act with his real life son Sage (who passed away in 2012) was I suppose a nice thing but this is a film which also did not fully realize another interesting idea-that being Balboa is brain damaged from all the brutal fights he has had. In this modern era of CTE and everyone being concerned about concussions, the idea is ahead of its time-and them bringing back Burgess Meredith in a dream sequence was another fumble because the Mickey here did not act like the character we saw in the first three movies. This isn't unwatchably bad but it is a weird misfire which introduces rap to the franchise and yet they also somehow got ELTON JOHN to sing the end credits song and it wasn't one of the best things he ever recorded, that is for damn sure.
Who knows when I'll get around to seeing the other films w/ Rocky, but that will eventually happen.
Saturday, December 1, 2018
Friday, November 30, 2018
Rocky IV
Rocky IV (1985)
Runtime: 91 minutes
Directed by: Sly Stallone
Starring: The usual Rocky cast, plus Brigitte Nielsen and Dolph Lundgren... and a robot
From: United Artists
While I now know why the robot was in the film, it's still befuddling... everything revolving around it being given to Paulie as a birthday present.
If you wanted to show someone a few movies from the 1980's that stand as a monument to the decade, this would for sure have to be a selection-in late 2018 the movie is often unintentionally hilarious and it encapsulates how over the top the decade was... not to mention provide a plethora of period ditties, what the hot vehicles of the time were (such as the Lamborghini Countach), the continuing views of the Soviet Union being the enemy because of the Cold War despite America's relationship between them starting to thaw out by this time, the sometimes silly clothing and yes, robots... more on that later.
Rocky IV became like a cartoon as Rocky Balboa is now an American superhero who goes on a Soviet sojourn in order to avenge the death of Apollo Creed by Ivan Drago-now, it's great that this launched Dolph Lundgren's career and all but Dr9ago does not exactly have any depth besides being a large, muscular human being who does not say much, does then-revolutionary training techniques and oh yeah, injects steroids also. Thank goodness the Russians don't do THAT anymore... the story is incredibly rushed as there are all those damn montages and the film is only an hour and a half long. The idea of Apollo not being able to handle being out of the ring is a fine one, but that is rushed too.
Then there is that robot... recently I discovered it was a real life creation that was used and helped out Stallone's son Seargeoh, who has autism. Sly wanting to put that robot in the film is understandable... but not why the robot's role was being a birthday present for Paulie, or how (according to a deleted scene) it was Paulie who somehow took apart that machine and gave it a female voice. Those scenes are the most cartoony in a film that was over the top to the point that Rocky doesn't run up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art but instead randomly climbs up a mountain. The nuance and maturity of the first two is long gone and instead you get what seems like a coke-fueled version of a boxing picture.
Yet I am not surprised this was a huge hit because it was a product of its time and such a bombastic film was perfect for people of the mid 1980's. They even loved that silly, idealistic speech from Balboa in the conclusion... as if Rocky could end The Cold War like that.
Runtime: 91 minutes
Directed by: Sly Stallone
Starring: The usual Rocky cast, plus Brigitte Nielsen and Dolph Lundgren... and a robot
From: United Artists
While I now know why the robot was in the film, it's still befuddling... everything revolving around it being given to Paulie as a birthday present.
If you wanted to show someone a few movies from the 1980's that stand as a monument to the decade, this would for sure have to be a selection-in late 2018 the movie is often unintentionally hilarious and it encapsulates how over the top the decade was... not to mention provide a plethora of period ditties, what the hot vehicles of the time were (such as the Lamborghini Countach), the continuing views of the Soviet Union being the enemy because of the Cold War despite America's relationship between them starting to thaw out by this time, the sometimes silly clothing and yes, robots... more on that later.
Rocky IV became like a cartoon as Rocky Balboa is now an American superhero who goes on a Soviet sojourn in order to avenge the death of Apollo Creed by Ivan Drago-now, it's great that this launched Dolph Lundgren's career and all but Dr9ago does not exactly have any depth besides being a large, muscular human being who does not say much, does then-revolutionary training techniques and oh yeah, injects steroids also. Thank goodness the Russians don't do THAT anymore... the story is incredibly rushed as there are all those damn montages and the film is only an hour and a half long. The idea of Apollo not being able to handle being out of the ring is a fine one, but that is rushed too.
Then there is that robot... recently I discovered it was a real life creation that was used and helped out Stallone's son Seargeoh, who has autism. Sly wanting to put that robot in the film is understandable... but not why the robot's role was being a birthday present for Paulie, or how (according to a deleted scene) it was Paulie who somehow took apart that machine and gave it a female voice. Those scenes are the most cartoony in a film that was over the top to the point that Rocky doesn't run up the steps of the Philadelphia Museum of Art but instead randomly climbs up a mountain. The nuance and maturity of the first two is long gone and instead you get what seems like a coke-fueled version of a boxing picture.
Yet I am not surprised this was a huge hit because it was a product of its time and such a bombastic film was perfect for people of the mid 1980's. They even loved that silly, idealistic speech from Balboa in the conclusion... as if Rocky could end The Cold War like that.
Thursday, November 29, 2018
Rocky III
Rocky III (1982)
Runtime: 99 minutes
Directed by: Sly Stallone
Starring: The usual Rocky people, plus Mr. T
From: United Artists
Runtime: 99 minutes
Directed by: Sly Stallone
Starring: The usual Rocky people, plus Mr. T
From: United Artists
How did I forget the one scene where Paulie suddenly becomes a bigot... or rather, shows everyone he is a bigot?
While this isn't to the extreme like what was got in IV, III is still amazingly 1980's... the presence of several iconic figures from the decade will do that, but there's a scene in an arcade and then there's the clothing, the music, Rocky in a print ad for Delorean... this is definitely from the decade of excess.
This is less serious than the first two movies yet is still pretty entertaining. Rocky Balboa is now rich and he is beating challengers... who aren't that great. The over the top Clubber Lang goads the champ into a match despite Mickey's fears over his health. Things do not go well as Balboa has become soft so it takes Apollo Creed training him via his methods for him to stand a chance in the rematch. Rocky doesn't have the eye of the tiger anymore, a statement that is stated at least a dozen times in the film.
Mr. T will never be a master thespian but he was at least memorable with the character he portrayed. The same goes for Hulk Hogan as THUNDERLIPS in that preposterous wrestler vs. boxer charity match. The main cast did swell with their roles and it was nice to see Adrian be assertive in one scene and help Rocky get over a big event in the film. Paulie will always be Paulie, I suppose... I'd be lying if I said that character's one scene where he made some racial comments was the only time that Paulie has ever thought that way-Burt Young was always memorable in that role, along with Burgess Meredith as the cantankerous Mickey.
The boxing in this franchise has never been the most realistic, yet that is fine for me as I am not a big fan of the sport anyhow. What you see is exciting and the stories of each fight is different and easy for anyone to follow. While I am sure Rocky suffered brain damage in his two Clubber Lang bouts even before he got to Ivan Drago with all the punches he took right to the skull, you're not supposed to think about what we know now as CTE... instead you can be amused at how the relationship between Rocky and Creed seems rather homoerotic by today's standards.
Tuesday, November 27, 2018
Rocky II
Rocky II (1979)
Runtime: 119 minutes
Directed by: Sly Stallone
Starring: The usual Rocky series regulars
From: United Artists
In this movie's universe, both Joe Spinell and the character he portrays in this series (Tony Gazzo) exist, and that is a great thing.
A few years ago I reviewed the OG Rocky film-that is a classic and it's been watched a few times by me, including once years ago on the big screen. Talk about a perfect underdog story which still inspires many people today-a poor schlub gets a once in a lifetime opportunity by getting to fight against the Heavyweight boxing champion but the actual fight is a small piece of the puzzle-the rest is Rocky Balboa rising up from the lower-class background he was resigned to for years because he did not believe in himself and dealing with a disparate cast of pals and those that doubt him, he becomes a person almost impossible to root against.
I hadn't seen any of the sequels in many years so when I realized that (at least for now) the first five films in the franchise are for FREE on Google Play and YouTube, it was an opportune time for me to finally talk about them here. In this film, Rocky retires so he can marry Adrian and start a family. However, as he's a high school dropout and isn't too good at reading, finding a regular job is difficult and he is like most people when they suddenly acquire a lot of cash for the first time, meaning it's spent foolishly. A commercial suit doesn't go well-I laughed when a chair emblazoned with “Joe Spinell” is in the background of one scene-it is great how he exists in a movie where there is a character played by Spinell. Meanwhile, Apollo Creed gets the late 70's equivalent of YouTube or Twitter comments that accuse him of either losing the fight or the whole thing being staged, so he is desperate for a rematch.
While there is a soap opera-esque subplot that takes up some time, otherwise this is an engrossing look at how the first fight changed both participants and despite their cries at the end of the bout about there being no rematch, of course there had to be one. Thankfully this was not just a retread of the original story... the main players continue their growth, including Adrian. In my review for Rocky I really should have said more about her... about how Talia Shire was great in the role and how she also changed, from a meek and mousy little girl to someone a lot more confident.
The rematch is for certain different also, as is the score from Bill Conti. Elements of it are definitely dated as being from the era of disco, but I am fine with that. This isn't wacky like III or IV and isn't a misfire like V, but II is still a solid motion picture that sure as hell is still touching for those that need a lift or some encouragement.
Runtime: 119 minutes
Directed by: Sly Stallone
Starring: The usual Rocky series regulars
From: United Artists
In this movie's universe, both Joe Spinell and the character he portrays in this series (Tony Gazzo) exist, and that is a great thing.
A few years ago I reviewed the OG Rocky film-that is a classic and it's been watched a few times by me, including once years ago on the big screen. Talk about a perfect underdog story which still inspires many people today-a poor schlub gets a once in a lifetime opportunity by getting to fight against the Heavyweight boxing champion but the actual fight is a small piece of the puzzle-the rest is Rocky Balboa rising up from the lower-class background he was resigned to for years because he did not believe in himself and dealing with a disparate cast of pals and those that doubt him, he becomes a person almost impossible to root against.
I hadn't seen any of the sequels in many years so when I realized that (at least for now) the first five films in the franchise are for FREE on Google Play and YouTube, it was an opportune time for me to finally talk about them here. In this film, Rocky retires so he can marry Adrian and start a family. However, as he's a high school dropout and isn't too good at reading, finding a regular job is difficult and he is like most people when they suddenly acquire a lot of cash for the first time, meaning it's spent foolishly. A commercial suit doesn't go well-I laughed when a chair emblazoned with “Joe Spinell” is in the background of one scene-it is great how he exists in a movie where there is a character played by Spinell. Meanwhile, Apollo Creed gets the late 70's equivalent of YouTube or Twitter comments that accuse him of either losing the fight or the whole thing being staged, so he is desperate for a rematch.
While there is a soap opera-esque subplot that takes up some time, otherwise this is an engrossing look at how the first fight changed both participants and despite their cries at the end of the bout about there being no rematch, of course there had to be one. Thankfully this was not just a retread of the original story... the main players continue their growth, including Adrian. In my review for Rocky I really should have said more about her... about how Talia Shire was great in the role and how she also changed, from a meek and mousy little girl to someone a lot more confident.
The rematch is for certain different also, as is the score from Bill Conti. Elements of it are definitely dated as being from the era of disco, but I am fine with that. This isn't wacky like III or IV and isn't a misfire like V, but II is still a solid motion picture that sure as hell is still touching for those that need a lift or some encouragement.
Gamera vs. Guiron
Gamera vs. Guiron (Gamera Tai Daiakaiju Giron) (1969)
Runtime: 82 minutes
Directed by: Noriaki Yuasa
Starring: Nobuhiro Kajima, Miyuki Akiyama, Christopher Murphy, Hiroko Kai, Reiko Kasahara
From: Daiei
Runtime: 82 minutes
Directed by: Noriaki Yuasa
Starring: Nobuhiro Kajima, Miyuki Akiyama, Christopher Murphy, Hiroko Kai, Reiko Kasahara
From: Daiei
What a run of weird children's films I have seen as of late:
So, the giant knife monster can also throw out ninja stars? Why the F not?
This is actually the fifth film in the franchise but as it was the one I remembered the most due to sheer weirdness. After all, the plot is that a young Japanese boy and his American friend (OF COURSE it was the Japanese boy who was wearing the tiny shorts) end up on a spaceship controlled by two women on another planet, one you may call the Howard Johnson planet. Once arriving, the women (one of them named Barbella... no, not Barbarella, as the movie makes sure to clarify) first act friendly but they then try to EAT THE BRAINS of the children before taking over Earth and Gamera-by then a longtime hero of the children-has to save them while also doing battle with Guiron, a quadruped monster who has a knife for a head.
The series was deep into the era of being childish so there are plenty of goofy moments, the peak being Gamera at one point swinging on what was in essence a gymnastics high bar, but there also was Guiron doing battle with a doppelganger of Gyaos, the villain creature of the third movie. Guiron literally slices up Gyaos-including decapitation-which did put Knife Head over.
People will remember this best for the goofy dubbed version that was used for a season 3 episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000... that dubbed version is for free at various locations, but so is the proper subtitled version. At least this zany motion picture has a modicum of entertainment.
Sunday, November 25, 2018
Mac And Me
Mac and Me (1988)
Runtime: 95 minutes
Directed by: Stewart Raffill
Starring: Christine Ebersole, Jonathan Ward, Tina Caspary, Lauren Stanley, Jade Calegory
From: Orion
Would you believe both this and The Garbage Pail Kids Movie played on TCM Underground this past Friday night? I saw TGPKM and as I've already reviewed that and I still think it's laughably bad... but I hadn't seen Mac and Me in many, many years:
This motion picture features a score that sometimes sounds exactly like the music from Predator.
I had actually seen this damn movie before, in what had to be the early 90's. My memories were real hazy so this might as well have been a first time watch for me. Finally, I can say that after all these years... Lord did this ever rip off E.T. The template for that movie was followed real closely, down to how the aliens are brown-colored creatures. Unfortunately for Mac and Me, they created some ugy-ass and frightening aliens... I suppose you could say that Mac was sometimes sort of cute, but those things in adult form is nightmare fuel.
Yet I can't say this is unwatchably bad. Personally I am not a fan of the trope this uses (the “disbelieving authority figure” trope) but that's just me. There are plenty of moments that are hilarious in retrospect, such as the lead rolling off a cliff into a lake or all the 80's hair & clothing. The most infamous aspect is the rampant product placement... the inexplicable dance scene in McDonald's (complete with Ronald McDonald) is what everyone cites there but Skittles and-especially-Coca-Cola is more prominent in the film.
Another aspect that provided me much mirth is how Alan Silvestri's score sometimes is a carbon copy of the score he created for Predator. Personally, the creatures here are scarier than the Predator! Also, what an outrageous finale for a PG-rated kids film... the 1980's were truly different back then. And to think the Japanese version of the film (this news broke a few months ago) explicitly shows a pivotal moment that is definitely not OK for a family picture today. I am not surprised a film so odd has a cult following, or that due to the likes of Paul Rudd there have been multiple meme moments.
One last thing: I do have to give this credit for having a lead character in a wheelchair and he was played by an actual disabled actor... representation and all that.
Runtime: 95 minutes
Directed by: Stewart Raffill
Starring: Christine Ebersole, Jonathan Ward, Tina Caspary, Lauren Stanley, Jade Calegory
From: Orion
Would you believe both this and The Garbage Pail Kids Movie played on TCM Underground this past Friday night? I saw TGPKM and as I've already reviewed that and I still think it's laughably bad... but I hadn't seen Mac and Me in many, many years:
This motion picture features a score that sometimes sounds exactly like the music from Predator.
I had actually seen this damn movie before, in what had to be the early 90's. My memories were real hazy so this might as well have been a first time watch for me. Finally, I can say that after all these years... Lord did this ever rip off E.T. The template for that movie was followed real closely, down to how the aliens are brown-colored creatures. Unfortunately for Mac and Me, they created some ugy-ass and frightening aliens... I suppose you could say that Mac was sometimes sort of cute, but those things in adult form is nightmare fuel.
Yet I can't say this is unwatchably bad. Personally I am not a fan of the trope this uses (the “disbelieving authority figure” trope) but that's just me. There are plenty of moments that are hilarious in retrospect, such as the lead rolling off a cliff into a lake or all the 80's hair & clothing. The most infamous aspect is the rampant product placement... the inexplicable dance scene in McDonald's (complete with Ronald McDonald) is what everyone cites there but Skittles and-especially-Coca-Cola is more prominent in the film.
Another aspect that provided me much mirth is how Alan Silvestri's score sometimes is a carbon copy of the score he created for Predator. Personally, the creatures here are scarier than the Predator! Also, what an outrageous finale for a PG-rated kids film... the 1980's were truly different back then. And to think the Japanese version of the film (this news broke a few months ago) explicitly shows a pivotal moment that is definitely not OK for a family picture today. I am not surprised a film so odd has a cult following, or that due to the likes of Paul Rudd there have been multiple meme moments.
One last thing: I do have to give this credit for having a lead character in a wheelchair and he was played by an actual disabled actor... representation and all that.
Gamera
Gamera (1965)
Runtime: 78 minutes
Directed by: Noriaki Yuasa
Starring: Eiji Funakoshi, Harumi Kiritachi, Junichiro Yamashiko, Yoshiro Uchida, Michiko Sugata
From: Daiei Studios
What a blast from the past this was for me:
This universe was strangely not incredulous of the news that there suddenly is a 60 meter tall FLYING bipedal fire-breathing turtle roaming around.
As a kid I actually saw this film and the first few sequels on VHS; they were videostore rentals. A few years ago I purchased for real cheap the entire 11 movie franchise on DVD. Sure, it's from the not so revered Mill Creek but at least they are all in widescreen and are subtitled prints. Soon after purchase that set got misplaced; just last night I finally found it again so in the future I'll make my way through the set. The sequels quickly became silly and juvenile, but the original was more serious... although the inspiration for this initial kaiju flick was blatantly obvious.
In fact, you could argue this was a ripoff of Gojira, from how the monster is let loose due to nuclear weapons to how it breathes fire... stomps around miniature sets and scientists have to figure out a unique solution to eradicating it because electricity and military weapons do not work against it. In Gamera's case the theme that was stressed was not Japanese guilt over World War II but instead the Cold War so naturally Japan wishes those two sides would get along. This does have something that the original Godzilla doesn't: an annoying little boy who thinks the kaiju is his pal. This goofball is named Toshiro and he is pretty much the “I Like Turtles!” meme kid but thankfully for me he was not such an irritant that he ruined the movie... even if he does some dumb S. Other things like the movie at times spinning its wheels and killing time was a bigger issue for me.
This is lesser than the 1954 Godzilla in just about every facet, but that does not mean this is a bad movie. There is the expected kaiju action and as wacky as a 60 meter tall flying bipedal fire-breathing turtle is, from memory this is far more serious than the juvenile sequels that were to follow.
Runtime: 78 minutes
Directed by: Noriaki Yuasa
Starring: Eiji Funakoshi, Harumi Kiritachi, Junichiro Yamashiko, Yoshiro Uchida, Michiko Sugata
From: Daiei Studios
What a blast from the past this was for me:
This universe was strangely not incredulous of the news that there suddenly is a 60 meter tall FLYING bipedal fire-breathing turtle roaming around.
As a kid I actually saw this film and the first few sequels on VHS; they were videostore rentals. A few years ago I purchased for real cheap the entire 11 movie franchise on DVD. Sure, it's from the not so revered Mill Creek but at least they are all in widescreen and are subtitled prints. Soon after purchase that set got misplaced; just last night I finally found it again so in the future I'll make my way through the set. The sequels quickly became silly and juvenile, but the original was more serious... although the inspiration for this initial kaiju flick was blatantly obvious.
In fact, you could argue this was a ripoff of Gojira, from how the monster is let loose due to nuclear weapons to how it breathes fire... stomps around miniature sets and scientists have to figure out a unique solution to eradicating it because electricity and military weapons do not work against it. In Gamera's case the theme that was stressed was not Japanese guilt over World War II but instead the Cold War so naturally Japan wishes those two sides would get along. This does have something that the original Godzilla doesn't: an annoying little boy who thinks the kaiju is his pal. This goofball is named Toshiro and he is pretty much the “I Like Turtles!” meme kid but thankfully for me he was not such an irritant that he ruined the movie... even if he does some dumb S. Other things like the movie at times spinning its wheels and killing time was a bigger issue for me.
This is lesser than the 1954 Godzilla in just about every facet, but that does not mean this is a bad movie. There is the expected kaiju action and as wacky as a 60 meter tall flying bipedal fire-breathing turtle is, from memory this is far more serious than the juvenile sequels that were to follow.
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