Wildwood

I watched the new Laika movie, their magnum opus... and I don't love it like most others do!

Why did Laika have to commit those modern movie-making sins?

Yes, it's the return of Hot Take Blair, when I had no idea this wouldn't be a film I love, given its strong reception (at least on Letterboxd) so far. I saw no films on Saturday but Sunday was a double-header at the cinema; the other flick will be reviewed the next day.

Elsewhere, there's been negative chatter due to the plot not being as sophisticated or complex like a Miyazaki picture... that wasn't even my beef, as it was still a rousing flick which was more than just a girl (named PRUE; I really hope it's short for Prudence) looking for her missing toddler brother after he's kidnapped by crows. For some reason, the alleged “demonization” of crows also made some upset! That wasn't my beef either, nor how this is bizarre version of Oregon where everything outside of Portland is a fantasy forest world full of talking animals—although that last detail WAS rather jarring at first. Is this what the people of Portland think the rest of Oregon is?

Rather, I am a little mad at myself as there should have been more concern for the director of Wildwood given that this year's Masters of the Universe was one of the worst movies ever seen at the cinema! That said, I've seen Kubo and the Two Strings before and didn't recall it having any aggravating moments, so why should I have thought this would have-especially for a project evidently in development for a decade and a half:

a) Too much “humor”/”humor” that isn't necessary & ruins a scene

b) Idiot characters being “funny” by babbling nonsense/acting stupid

c) A bumbling buffoon male protagonist sidekick to the leading female character. I REALLY did not like Curtis for much of the film, in other words

Of course I've never read the book this is based on but this didn't seem to take a dump on the source material like Masters did... where they CONSTANTLY crapped on the property and turned it into a pathetic joke. At least Wildwood didn't do that.

There's no shortage of modern movie-making sins, as I am discussed in length on a frequent basis. However, I am massively disappointed that this studio fell into such a trap. There's still no complaints about giving my money to support such a studio—as you've heard already, the stop-motion is stunning. As you might have heard, the score was nice and while the long finale was rather bombastic, it at least had some nice action beats.

It took a long while but I finally did get invested in the story somewhat and started to support Prudence. I'm glad most others love this movie far more than me, who “liked” rather than “loved” what is Laika's magnum opus. The movie is every bit its PG-13 rating considering all the death & destruction; at the same time, it's nice for the older kids to see such a rousing tale based on classical ideas as they probably don't get enough of those ideas in modern entertainment. It was nice to see something made for both adults & children, plus the minimal amount of crass humor was welcomed by me.

While Wildwood ultimately did disappoint, it's far from the biggest disappointment at the cinema in 2026, which has been the worst year of film I can recall in my lifetime. While the other Laika I've seen I'd rather revisit than this (including Kubo and Coraline), thank heavens Wildwood is not in the “bad” category, despite itself.

The Pit and the Pendulum (The Roger Corman Version)

The Pit and the Pendulum (1961)

Runtime: 80 minutes

Directed by: Roger Corman

Starring: Vincent Price, John Kerr, Luana Anders, Antony Carbone, Barbara Steele

From: AIP 

Even more so than viewing an Edgar Allan Poe story in October, or a movie made by Roger Corman, or Barbara Steele's presence, Vincent Price is a must this time of year. I knew selecting this was the right choice in the opening minutes... this begins with multicolored gel on the screen, then a creepy score-Les Baxter, who I predominately know for his contributions to the awesome exotica musical genre-then an awesome matte painting as our lead Francis Barnard visits a castle, which of course features exactly the sort of Gothic interior you'd desire for such a chilling tale.

Many know how Mr. Barnard visits the castle upon news that his sister Elizabeth has passed away, or how this is set during the time of the Spanish Inquisition, which no one ever expects... there's ghosts, a torture chamber, cobwebs, and other details that permeated the walls of the castle, the “miasma of barbarity” that was the atmosphere. There's also flashbacks tinted various colors, which show the misfortune that befell on the life of Price's character, Nicholas. 

This isn't the initial time I've thought it a mistake that not all of Corman's Poe Cycle films have been viewed, but the thought has never been stronger in my mind than now. Of course, Price was awesome as the tragic figure yet the rest of the cast also delivered... Steele, John Kerr, Luana Anders, Antony Carbone. There's the great sets and the direction, but it's the Richard Matheson plot (which has little to do w/ the original Poe tale, aside from the titular pendulum) which made this a ghastly delight, the sort of atmospheric horror movie I wish was around today.

 

West of Zanzibar

West of Zanzibar (1928)

Runtime: 65 minutes

Directed by: Tod Browning

Starring: Lon Chaney, Sr., Mary Nolan, Warner Baxter, Lionel Barrymore, Tiny Ward

From: MGM

I was glad to have some silent horror to talk about this month, along w/ a film from Lon Chaney, Sr., directed by Tod Browning. This belongs in the category of late silents that featured a score alongside various sound effects (including laughter + applause) but there are still intertitles displaying all the dialogue. 

What an opening act this has. Chaney is a magician who is paralyzed from the waist-down after a dispute with the dude (Lionel Barrymore!) who steals his wife. They flee, but a year later she returns w/ baby... she dies in a church and father/daughter head on over to what is now the country of Tanzania; after a time-jump of 18 years, he rules the “superstitious natives” via his magic tricks.

This is all in the first 10 minutes. To address the elephant in the room, the depiction of Black people is as dated for a 98 year old film as you'd expect. Alas... Lionel Barrymore is now an ivory trader (wild if you only know him as the evil SOB Mr. Potter from It's a Wonderful Life. If you want a mind-trip, view Barrymore in Browning's The Devil-Doll. He spends long stretches dressed as an old woman!) while Warner Baxter is Chaney's personal doctor who loves the booze.

What a sordid tale this is, a heated story set in the jungles which involves revenge, prostitution, other taboos, and a tale where Chaney is the true villain of the piece with his behavior. I mean, he truly played the long game with his plan. This was remade a few years later as Kongo; now, that apparently was a really wild Pre-Code effort, with a lead character that was far more vile than what Lon, Sr. presented here.

I dare not reveal more except that a key moment involved a human skeleton. Apropos, given that just a few hours ago when I was on the road, I viewed a first... a random dude in an old Volkswagen Jetta had a human skeleton in his passenger seat! Was he doing it as an HOV scam?

Corpse Bride

Yes, I've finally watched this movie: 

Hopscotch!

This isn't the only request I've had to see a film this Spooky Season (hopefully I'll get to them all) but I chose this first. Everyone will be FLABBERGASTED I hadn't viewed this before... not just for it having over 2 million ratings on Letterboxd, but that I dig The Nightmare Before Christmas. Of course, Tim Burton moving on from just producing Christmas to co-directing Bride & including all his muses (Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Danny Elfman) meant that this was mainly what I was expecting—compliment.

A plot synopsis surely isn't needed; thus, I'll mention that having romance at the forefront was the most obvious change from Christmas. It was easy to feel sympathy for both Victor Van Dort (at the rest of offending some randos on Letterboxd, resembling Timothee Chalamet!) and Victoria Everglot; they were likable while both having awful parents in a monochromatic Victorian England who are forced to be in an arranged marriage. Emily the titular corpse bride is also a character you like. The colorful Land of the Dead is much more appealing, not just because it's literally more colorful. The undead are much livelier than the drab jerks “upstairs.”

As expected from Laika animation, the stop-motion was stunning; also unsurprising was the quality voice cast and catchy songs the audience sometimes hears. Like w/ Christmas, Bride is a ghoulish, macabre delight, featuring mild yet funnily morbid humor. Even the supporting characters were a hoot; my favorite was the maggot who was a homage to Peter Lorre. Thankfully, this charming romantic musical comedy film was a swell recommendation, although it was still something I should have watched many years ago.

 

The Deep Dark

The Deep Dark (Gueules Noires) (2023)

Runtime: 103 minutes

Directed by: Mathieu Turi

Starring: Samuel Le Bihan, Amir El Kacem, Jean-Hugues Anglade, Thomas Soliveres, Diego Martin

From: MANY different French companies

Why not watch a French creature feature set in 1956 at a mine? I noticed it on Prime awhile back but reading a positive review on a Discord server was enough a push for me to check this out.

A Moroccan named Amir is recruited in his home country to work at a mine in France... unbeknownst to him, the most dangerous mine in the country. If the profession, the prejudice, and a scientist's demands to dig dangerously deep weren't bad enough, they discover a creature. Parts of My Bloody Valentine are set in a mine-so is The Boogens-but it was a thrill for a horror pic where the crux of the action is set in subterranean areas featuring a crew of miners. As people presumably more knowledgeable than me about the topic have proclaimed, expect Lovecraftian horror.

After the prologue-set in 1856-it is a long while before any part of the creature is seen again. That was fine under these circumstances; time is spent getting to know Amir, establish the mining setting, meet his fellow miners, show the camaraderie with them, and show that the lead miner (Roland) is an authoritative but fair boss. Once the big bad is shown in full... it is an impressive, distinctive-looking creature, and the effects were practical instead of CG. This is when it becomes exciting, them running away or attempting to avoid detection. For those that enjoy gory, gross moments, this has a few of those.

As I always belly-ache about with the movies I don't like-especially those made in the 21st century-it's the plot and characters which make it or break it for me. Thank heavens that The Deep Dark had a fine story w/ characters I did care about... even the ending I felt was magnifique for the story they were telling. The movie is not a must-see but IMO it's better than the majority of the “modern popular horror” of recent years that just don't work for me.

I'll Post Multiple Reviews on Saturday

Before Sunday hits, I'll be caught up... promise.

Rude Awakening

It's been a few weeks but I'm reviewing an episode of an old British TV show... Hammer's House of Horrors, to be exact: 

I finally saw an episode of the 1980 British TV anthology show Hammer House of Horrors. I had a choice of 13 to choose from; this was selected as it seemed light in tone & I was curious about Denholm Elliott attempting to romance his much-younger secretary Lucy Gutteridge, i.e. the leading girl from Top Secret!

Note that Elliott is a dirty old man who is already married. His wife refuses to divorce him, so he's in a real pickle. This episode's gimmick is that Denholm is a real estate agent who has Gutteridge as a secretary, and he's in a surreal world where he-along w/ the viewer-isn't sure what's real and what's a dream as he is told about an old manor & he does disembodied voices, including one proclaiming, “You shouldn't have killed your wife!” British TV is different from its American counterpart; Elliott referred to his wife as a “bitch”... twice!

Also, the secretary Lolly looks completely different each time she appears; this adds to the surreal nature of the episode, along with such subtle details as camera angles/placement. Props to Peter Sasdy-director of such films as Taste the Blood of Dracula and The Stone Tape. This episode was fun, a macabre delight as Ol' Denholm is in a nightmare, bad things constantly happening to him. Elliott was magnetic as the lead, but I thought Gutteridge nailed it out of the park and was swell as Lolly, especially with the different personas she had in the dream(s).

Who knows when I'll see other episodes of the series (or even if I'll mention they were watched on Letterboxd) but I was happy to have seen something from Hammer House of Horrors.