Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star (1983)

Runtime: 92 befuddling minutes

Directed by: Alex Cheung

Starring: James Yi Liu, Cherie Chung, David Lo, Leung Tin, Tam Tin

From: Shaw Brothers 

This was NOT what I was expecting from “Shaw Brothers sci-fi movie that isn’t Super Inframan” It’s been almost six months since viewing anything from the studio; it’s mostly been oddities like this the past few years. Tomorrow I’ll finally review one of their traditional martial arts efforts; that should help wash out the taste of whatever this was. I mean, how can you explain something you don’t understand yourself?

A major problem: this has a lot of “Hong Kong Humor”, which is something that doesn’t always translate well for me and almost all of it here was as “funny” as rectal cancer. One scene here (involving a woman taking “an IQ test”) was HORRENDOUS beyond belief. To paraphrase a Letterboxd mutual, this had SIX writers-apparently each one wrote fifteen minutes of material independent of each other and it was all combined together. To steal a line from another source, the “plot” was more like a discombobulated bucket of body parts!

I’ll mention details as haphazardly as they were presented:

* The only “sci-fi” in the opening act: a drunk is burned by radiation from a UFO
* Sexism abounds as-among other things-the camera leers on a woman as wind blows up her dress a la The Seven Year Itch
* One of the private eye leads opens his shirt to reveal… not the Superman S but rather a blue shirt with the Shaw Brothers logo (!) as he makes a rescue
* A mad scientist accidentally drinks a potion meant for his caged gorilla. This guy becomes HORNY. That element further stains the film, how there’s “laughs” concerning sexual assault and “close encounters of the fourth kind”
* The opening credits are a blatant riff on Superman; that is matched by a theme song that’s a lightly-veiled disco riff of the John Williams theme. “Lightly-veiled” could be said by me often. In the second act, we see an insane version of the Millennium Falcon, along with what seemed to be Star Wars sounds directly lifted instead of mock versions.
* This isn’t entirely bottom of the barrel. There are two musical numbers (?!), the first featuring disco music, the other, the Cantonese attempting an imitation of an ABBA song! The music was better than the amateur nature of the numbers themselves. There are some scenes in general that looked real nice visually

The film does improve the longer you endure it; that’s mainly because the opening act stunk like yesterday’s garbage. The final act is when the sci-fi elements become more prominent. This includes Temu Darth Vader doing battle against a character I won’t name in a UFO. While that did go on for WAY too long, this did also give us a moment you’ll only see here: a lightsaber sword vs. lightsaber nunchaku battle!

The movie does have its moments & I can’t fault such aspects as the set design. However, the “humor” sank what could have been a fun sort of bonkers motion picture with a bizarre plot. Of course, your mileage may vary.

 

Vampyr

Vampyr (1932)

Runtime: 74 minutes

Directed by: Carl Theodor Dreyer

Starring: Nicolas de Gunzburg, Maurice Schultz, Rena Mandel, Sybille Schmitz, Jan Hieronimko

From: Tobis Filmkunst

I’m thankful to be in the camp that was a big fan of this German/French motion picture. Going in, I’ve known for years that this flick was driven by images, mood, vibes, and shadows more than dialogue and traditional narrative storytelling in presenting its plot. Some naturally won’t vibe w/ this style and might even consider the exercise “boring.”

My esoteric tastes, I was fascinated by this tale where “student of the occult” Allan stops at a French inn and becomes involved with the case of a young woman bitten by a vampire. The film takes its time and as this was the first sound picture for Carl Theodor Dreyer, this was the reason for the minimal dialogue. Pages from a book about vampires serve as the info dump for viewers. Meanwhile, the film was shot in soft focus for atmospheric reasons.

Buttressed by an excellent, moody score from Wolfgang Zeller, Vampyr was a rewarding journey that always was a visual treat. Shadows are seen often, always presented creatively-there’s also a long out-of-body sequence that was a stunning sequence of creativity. Not to reveal too much but the supernatural threat is felt more than seen, a specter that enveloped the atmosphere and loomed large over the film.

An experience like this will naturally not work as well for some film fans; Vampyr is still worth a shot… besides the sub-75 minute runtime, most at least respect the work if they don’t love the film. In hindsight, I should have checked this out in the fall, closer to Halloween. This would work well whether or not you officially participate in any Letterboxd lists for horror movies during the spookiest time of the year.

The Mask

The Mask (1994)

Runtime: 101 minutes

Directed by: Chuck Russell (RIP)

Starring: Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Greene, Peter Riegert, Richard Jeni

From: New Line Cinema

RIP Chuck Russell

Yesterday, news broke that Russell (no relation) passed away on Wednesday. While he did not make that many films, I have viewed all his famous efforts. Reviews were done for the third Nightmare on Elm Street and The Blob remake-both worthy of viewing for 80’s horror fans-along with Eraser and The Scorpion King, both amusing action films. However, The Mask hadn’t been tackled since the youth of my 90’s, making this an easy choice.

It wasn’t until years later that I heard the comic this was based on was MUCH darker; that’s irrelevant in this case as I was amused by this wacky live-action cartoon set in an otherwise serious world. Thankfully Jim Carrey wasn’t OOT constantly and was instead normal as the humongous dork Stanley Ipkiss who transforms after putting on that mysterious wooden mask… hilariously attributed to Loki.

As goofy as you expect a live-action cartoon to be, I was still amused. Thankfully, Ipkiss is a likable dork without the mask on, Cameron Diaz was a lovely dame in her debut and the late Peter Greene was quite the villain, along w/ Peter Riegert as the cop foil. It’s a shame that Greene had his personal demons as he was both classic here and as Zed in Pulp Fiction. It was also nice seeing Milo (a very memorable dog) and Amy Yasbeck & Richard Jeni in supporting roles.

Edge City was quite the colorful world-not just the awesome Coco Bongo club. The music was the highlight for me; the swing tunes were awesome, as was the rumba song Cuban Pete-an actual tune from the 30’s. Thankfully, most of the effects haven’t aged poorly. I also saw Ace Ventura: Pet Detective and Dumb & Dumber as a youth. One day D&D will be reviewed here; Ace Ventura I don’t hate yet Carrey was OOT constantly plus there’s that one key plot point…

Carrey did put out a nice statement concerning the great time he had filming The Mask and thanked Russell. New Line Cinema was hesitant about a comedian from In Living Color and a model turned first-time actor as the leads, yet Russell stuck to his guns and helped make two careers. There are rumors that one day there will be a remake which is more in tune w/ the Dark Horse comic series; no matter how that turns out, I’ll be glad that I can like this version, whether as a kid or an adult.

The Great Alligator

The Great Alligator (Il Fiume Del Grande Caimano) (1979)

Runtime: 89 minutes

Directed by: Sergio Martino

Starring: Barbara Bach, Claudio Cassinelli, Mel Ferrer, Romano Puppo, Fabrizia Castagnoli

From: Dania Film/Medusa Distribuzione

I expect to see a few movies for Spooky Season (starting in just a few weeks!) from the Eternal Family platform; there’s no harm in seeing one or more horror film on EF until then. This was Italian trash from Sergio Martino w/ a Stelvio Cipriani score starring Barbara Bach featuring other recognizable actors like Mel Ferrer, Richard Johnson-he is only in one scene, albeit one where he portrays a wacky character-familiar Italian face Romano Puppo and the dude who was TONY THE PIMP in Demons… yes I was interested.

The film is not a must-see and from what I’ve checked out, his giallos are better. That doesn’t mean there was not fun to be had w/ this nonsense. Mel Ferrer is the A-hole who owns a new resort in a tropical location-this was filmed in Sri Lanka. The local tribe capitulated and allowed these dumb white people to arrive… this angers a local god, who becomes a huge alligator & starts chomping on fools.

Alligator takes a long while to get going, some of the effects are rather quaint (I’m not talking of the fine miniatures; rather, the title creature sometimes has the “incredibly phony” appearance) and the ending made it clear for the viewer what film this was “inspired” by if they somehow didn’t know by that point. There’s unintentional comedy that included dialogue you’d only get in old Italian genre efforts… someone tells their pal in the water that they can go ahead and have a bowel movement, as no one would be able to tell!

Many (me included) won’t complain about seeing Bach in a film, the unexpected absurd moments, a memorable finale-even if it did not include the gore that some would desire-or the random 6-year-old girl who provided comic relief by delivering blunt comments… she actually was funny. However, the highlight wasn’t Bach or the Sri Lankan scenery; it was the Cipriani score. Sometimes funky, sometimes disco, always awesome. That was greatly appealing to my tastes & elevated the material.

I haven’t viewed many killer crocodilia films and there likely are better examples… thankfully The Great Alligator isn’t a CROC…

The Invite

The Invite (2026)

97% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 251 reviews)

Runtime: 107 unforgettable minutes

Directed by: Olivia Wilde

Starring: Wilde, Seth Rogen, Edward Norton, Penelope Cruz

From: A few studios, including A24

Yes, I am giving a high rating to a 2026 theatrical movie in wide release!

By now people are probably shocked at this development. Theatrical releases this year, some I liked rather than loved, while a few popular films I went Scorched Earth on. Before this, the only thing that received a ringing endorsement was the Baz Luhrmann documentary containing mostly new Elvis concert footage. I know people will be APPALLED by this admission but this is my first film directed by Olivia Wilde; what enticed me: knowing that after the opening scene this was a four-hander and a comparison was made to the all-time classic Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? Even Wilde herself noted that it was an influence, and not just on the plot.

It’s no shame then that The Invite isn’t an all-time classic like Woolf; be that as it may, I still found it to be great… yes, that was despite the sometimes constant usage of a certain overused curse word. That wasn’t my preference yet there was the suspicion going in that this would be the case-perhaps that didn’t ruin the experience as this IS about Wilde and Seth Rogen as a middle-aged couple who have one (unseen) daughter but are unhappily married and sometimes engage in caustic arguments. She invites Edward Norton and Penelope Cruz-upstairs neighbors in their apartment complex-to dinner.

The film was shot well—the apartment set didn’t feel confining or limiting until there are moments which require that claustrophobic feeling. I wasn’t familiar w/ Devonte Hynes but they delivered a memorable score. I also didn’t know this was based on a 2020 Spanish film unknown to me (The People Upstairs); at least I can say Will McCormack and Rashida Jones delivered a memorable script where the film was a comedy featuring funny moments-most of them rather adult in nature-yet also featured serious conversation and brutal honesty when it came to the fractured relationship of Rogen & Wilde. It’d be a crime to reveal anything more, except that the ending was the cherry on top of this cake.

The quartet all delivered great, nuanced performances-yes, even Rogen. OF COURSE at one point he smoked pot but that is likely a prerequisite for any part he takes. It was a relief to see a mature motion picture which will hit too close to home for those that are also middle-aged & in a troubled relationship with a spouse or a significant other… one which also has mature humor, including talk of sex… and the lack of sex in a relationship.

Not only will I see more from Wilde in the director’s chair going forward, it’d be wise to better support such motion pictures at the cinema when I’m able to. Flicks like this are much more appealing to me than what is usually seen as “popular” currently by most.

Shipwrecked: Nightmare at Sea

This is a new Netflix documentary that sadly was a bit of a letdown: 

This is a Netflix documentary I am disappointed in. The reason for viewing: more than one YouTube video has been viewed of this incident. On January 13, 2012, the Italian cruise ship Costa Concordia passed by too closely to the reef off the shore of Giglio Island, Italy, resulting in a huge gash that sunk the ship.

It was nice to hear from both passengers and the crew of the ship as the villain of this story (Captain Francesco Schettino) decided to deviate from the route to sail that close to the island… to impress the people of the island and allegedly, to also impress his mistress… but this did not bring up the mistress aspect at all, nor that on the bridge he wasn’t wearing his glasses. I’m not sure why they tried to downplay the Captain’s role, but that was baffling. Arguably, Shipwrecked should have better stressed how poor a decision it was to deviate from the route. Some have mentioned that they should have paid better tribute to those that lost their lives; agreed, plus they didn’t even have a tribute to those individuals, not even a blurb. 

Yeah, they did at least present that Schettino was an A-hole who waited WAY too long to call evacuation, then worst of all abandoned ship (deliberately ignoring the orders of the Coast Guard) instead of going down with the ship-figuratively… they’re supposed to leave last. Besides hearing from those on the ship giving their thoughts on what a disaster this was, footage filmed on the night and the days after was truly fascinating.

However, the complaints I’ve heard that this should have included more technical detail and less extraneous details from the passengers… yeah, that can be argued. That said, I recommend reading the Wiki article concerning this tragedy for the proper context. Those YouTube videos I saw were only like 20 minutes long; no specific examples can be given of videos that are at least an hour long but I’m sure a proper search plus reading the comments can guide you in the right direction as they will for me eventually. Hopefully those will do a better job of properly raking Francesco Schettino over the coals.

Gordon's War, Revisited

I watched this movie last night; it was reviewed here 15 (!) years ago but this new review was posted on Letterboxd a little earlier: 

An obscure blaxploitation picture I was happy to revisit for the first time in 15 years. It’s still a shame that the film never made it past the DVD era & the only way to track it down is now incredibly rare showings on the Fox Movie Channel or a YouTube rip; that’s how last night’s viewing came about. Awhile back, someone I know online mentioned the movie elsewhere-about time I finish that discussion.

Paul Winfield (the main reason I first checked this out) is a soldier returning from the Vietnam War; his girl OD’ed from heroin, and he is quite upset that Harlem has been ruined by pimps & drug dealers. He meets a trio of buddies who were also former soldiers and they systematically come down hard on those scumbags via a series of steps with military precision. That’s as complicated as the plot becomes—sometimes you don’t need complex, thought-provoking cinema; instead, the visceral thrill of brutal revenge on sleazy criminals is all you need to be satisfied. A background of The Bad New York City of Old is only icing on the cake. 

Only some genre efforts were directed by someone Black; this was the case here w/ famed actor Ossie Davis. He only had a few directing credits but between this and Cotton Comes to Harlem (even better) he could have had a fine career in this role as well. War always intrigues between the strategy of our heroes, the genre trappings-funky score, clothing, slang, OOT personalities, etc.-a nice vehicle chase and a great moment involving an aerosol can.

While a better physical media release will hopefully occur one day, not every obscure movie even has the luxury of a YouTube upload which looks rather good for a 480p stream. Winfield is the highlight acting-wise but the rest of the cast was fine. There’s even Grace Jones for a scene, although her role was of the stereotypical sort. Even a more “serious” blaxploitation like this can still be a blast.