The Bird with the Crystal Plumage (L'uccello Dalle Piume Di Cristallo) (1970)
Runtime: 96 minutes
Directed by: Dario Argento
Starring: Tony Musante, Suzy Kendall, Enrico Maria Salerno, Eva Renzi, Mario Adorf
From: Central Cinema Company Film
I figured I should watch some sort of horror film on Halloween, and why not one I hadn't seen before, and why not what has been said to be Argento's directorial debut? To steal the plot description for this giallo film from the IMDb:
“Sam an American writer in Rome witnesses a murder attempt on the wife of the owner of an art gallery by a sinister man in a raincoat and black leather gloves - but Sam is powerless to do anything as he gets trapped between a double set of glass doors in going to her aid. The woman survives and the police say that she is the first surviving victim of a notorious serial killer. But when they fail to make any progress with the case Sam decides to investigate on his own turning up several clues that point in the direction of just one possible suspect - assuming that he really knows who hes looking for...”
I've heard this described as a Hitchcockian film and that seems appropriate. A foreigner at first is wrongly accused, he starts investigating himself which seems to put himself in harm's way... the influences are clear to me. Also, things aren't always as they seem.
This is quite the debut. You can say what you wear about the acting or some parts of the plot (really, when you find out what it's all about, it does seem a little far-fetched), but it is well-done overall, from the cinematography to how the film looks, some of the setpieces are cool and the Ennio Morricone score is really good and odd and it fits what you see.
There's some quirky humor too, which kept me amused. For example, there was a scene where Sam had to view a lineup of “perverts”. Yes, that's what they were referred to as. You also find out that the police in Italy don't consider transvestites to be perverts. Progressive for the time. I also laughed at the late 60's computers that are on display and used; wacky. So is seeing Mario Adorf (someone I know for some poliziotteschi films) in a one scene cameo as a very quirky painter who lives in the middle of nowhere, lives with many cats (he's not a cat lady; rather, he eats cats!) and he has giant hair and a full beard. That scene got a big laugh out of me.
I'll be back Saturday night. I am thinking that it's about time for me to finally see another poliziotteschi film.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Monday, October 28, 2013
An Update
Unfortunately, I wasn't able to watch anything during the weekend. Things were busy and I was tied up in Tampa 2 hours more than expected so that threw everything off. Between that, doing fantasy NBA stuff (hey, the season does start tomorrow) and other things, I might as well just take it easy for this week and not watch anything and not worry about this site until Thursday night, when I will return for what I hope will be an appropriate Halloween review.
Sorry about having to change plans this month, but October has just been wacky for me and not always in a good way. I was hoping to watch more horror films but maybe next year will be better...
Sorry about having to change plans this month, but October has just been wacky for me and not always in a good way. I was hoping to watch more horror films but maybe next year will be better...
Sunday, October 27, 2013
Death Car On The Freeway
Death Car on the Freeway (1979)
Runtime: 91 minutes
Directed by: The late Hal Needham
Starring: Shelley Hack, Frank Gorshin, Peter Graves, George Hamilton
From: The Shpetner Company
Here's something unusual from me: an obscure late 70's made for TV movie (made for CBS, to be exact) that I found out about recently; on a podcast I was listening to someone wrote in asking for advice on a movie he saw but did not know its title. He gave some info and evidently he never uses Google as one of the hosts found it right away; it was this movie but the host did not notice that it was from Hal Needham. The movie sounded interesting to watch (think of the old Spielberg movie Duel in terms of plot), has quite the 70's TV cast (besides who I mentioned already, there's Harriet Nelson, a.k.a the mom from the 50's classic Ozzie & Harriet, Dinah Shore, Abe Vigoda, and even Sid Haig) and it sounded horror-related, or at least it's a thriller. But, then I heard yesterday that Mr. Needham passed away and I figured tonight was the perfect time to watch it.
Like I said, the plot is similar to the Spielberg TV movie Duel, from '71. Here, a mysterious person in a bitchin' Dodge van chases after random women on the Los Angeles highway and causes problems. He repaints it to try and thwart the authorities. Lady reporter Janette (Hack) covers the case in a strong way, which causes problems as it's the late 70's so there's rampant sexism from the police chief (Graves) and from her fellow reporter ex-boyfriend (Hamilton) who pretty much acts like Ron Burgundy, but in a serious way. He was a real stubborn A-hole.
There are certainly plenty of vintage cars to watch and enjoy if that's your thing, from that 70's van to a really early Civic (it looks a lot different now... and it's a lot larger too), the much maligned Mustang II and a Chevy Chevette. Oh, and the killer is known as THE FREEWAY FIDDLER. No, he does not fiddle himself while driving. Rather, when he goes on the attack he blasts some crappy country song where the fiddle player is going wild, as if he's Charlie Daniels on a coke binge.
Overall, the movie is fine. If it would have been R then things would have gotten more hardcore and there'd be more of a bite to it. Still, I enjoyed it for what it was and as you can see, various aspects of the film tickled me pink, especially while watching it in late 2013. While there was plenty of sexism to be seen at least it came from rude idiot guys and Janette doesn't accept any of that crap; feminists would of course appreciate such things. She is determined to do things on her own without the help of any man as she tries to stop the Fiddler.
If you want to see a Hal Needham version of Duel (with his trademark car crashes and explosions and other stunts; Hal even has a small role as a stunt driver) where the second unit director was later the director of Action Jackson, Stone Cold, and I Come in Peace-yes, Craig R. Baxley-with some wackiness and some groovy music (typical 70's stuff... I wasn't talking about the fiddle song), then you might as well watch it on YouTube.
Runtime: 91 minutes
Directed by: The late Hal Needham
Starring: Shelley Hack, Frank Gorshin, Peter Graves, George Hamilton
From: The Shpetner Company
Here's something unusual from me: an obscure late 70's made for TV movie (made for CBS, to be exact) that I found out about recently; on a podcast I was listening to someone wrote in asking for advice on a movie he saw but did not know its title. He gave some info and evidently he never uses Google as one of the hosts found it right away; it was this movie but the host did not notice that it was from Hal Needham. The movie sounded interesting to watch (think of the old Spielberg movie Duel in terms of plot), has quite the 70's TV cast (besides who I mentioned already, there's Harriet Nelson, a.k.a the mom from the 50's classic Ozzie & Harriet, Dinah Shore, Abe Vigoda, and even Sid Haig) and it sounded horror-related, or at least it's a thriller. But, then I heard yesterday that Mr. Needham passed away and I figured tonight was the perfect time to watch it.
Like I said, the plot is similar to the Spielberg TV movie Duel, from '71. Here, a mysterious person in a bitchin' Dodge van chases after random women on the Los Angeles highway and causes problems. He repaints it to try and thwart the authorities. Lady reporter Janette (Hack) covers the case in a strong way, which causes problems as it's the late 70's so there's rampant sexism from the police chief (Graves) and from her fellow reporter ex-boyfriend (Hamilton) who pretty much acts like Ron Burgundy, but in a serious way. He was a real stubborn A-hole.
There are certainly plenty of vintage cars to watch and enjoy if that's your thing, from that 70's van to a really early Civic (it looks a lot different now... and it's a lot larger too), the much maligned Mustang II and a Chevy Chevette. Oh, and the killer is known as THE FREEWAY FIDDLER. No, he does not fiddle himself while driving. Rather, when he goes on the attack he blasts some crappy country song where the fiddle player is going wild, as if he's Charlie Daniels on a coke binge.
Overall, the movie is fine. If it would have been R then things would have gotten more hardcore and there'd be more of a bite to it. Still, I enjoyed it for what it was and as you can see, various aspects of the film tickled me pink, especially while watching it in late 2013. While there was plenty of sexism to be seen at least it came from rude idiot guys and Janette doesn't accept any of that crap; feminists would of course appreciate such things. She is determined to do things on her own without the help of any man as she tries to stop the Fiddler.
If you want to see a Hal Needham version of Duel (with his trademark car crashes and explosions and other stunts; Hal even has a small role as a stunt driver) where the second unit director was later the director of Action Jackson, Stone Cold, and I Come in Peace-yes, Craig R. Baxley-with some wackiness and some groovy music (typical 70's stuff... I wasn't talking about the fiddle song), then you might as well watch it on YouTube.
Friday, October 25, 2013
RIP Hal Needham
No review tonight. I'll be going out in a bit. One thing I'll do is have an alcoholic beverage and tip my glass (well, bottle) to Hal Needham, the stuntman/director who passed away today at the age of 82. His most famous work is Smokey & The Bandit, which I saw one time on the big screen a few years ago with Burt Reynolds in attendance (my take on that here).
Tomorrow night, I should return and I plan on watching something obscure from him, which happens to be on YouTube.
Tomorrow night, I should return and I plan on watching something obscure from him, which happens to be on YouTube.
Thursday, October 24, 2013
Machete Kills
Machete Kills (2013)
29% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 99 reviews)
Runtime: 107 minutes
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez
Starring: Many people, including Danny Trejo, Mel Gibson, Amber Heard, Sofia Vergara, & Carlos Estevez
From: Open Road
I still remember first seeing the fake Machete trailer back in '07 and I thought it looked awesome. I then enjoyed Machete which I saw twice on the big screen (including once at a drive-in with the ultimate perfect partner in Piranha), the review you can read here. As I did have a lot of fun with the first movie, I was hoping it'd be the same with the sequel. The fact that I only saw it last night is telling, though. The pretty bad reviews turned me off, and even before that people were complaining about how there were too many characters in the film; turns out they were right...
The plot, via myself: Things happen in the beginning, and Machete is brought to the White House to meet the President (Charlie Sheen, acting under the name on his birth certificate) and he has to go down to Mexico to try and take down a bad guy who wants to blow up Washington. A lot happens and it ends up being tied to a guy with the Bond-esque name of Luthur Voz (Gibson). In fact, the movie has a surprising amount to do with a certain Bond film that I won't spoil as it would reveal quite a bit.
It won't be until tonight but when I do write up my opinion of it on Letterboxd, I'll likely give it 2 and a half stars out of 5. That seems most appropriate. There are things I enjoyed but then there are other things that I thought were just stupid, being over the top but in a dumb and insulting way. It went up and down like a rollercoaster. It was bipoloar, which is ironic given that... but that's another spoiler. What counts as a stupid thing was how Walton Goggins, Cuba Gooding Jr., Lady Gaga and Antonio Banderas all played the same character, El Camaleon. That was just a waste.
There indeed proved to be way too many characters in this movie. That certainly did not help what was a mess of a script, where things are chaotic in a poor way and that has to be a big reason why it was such a flick with mixed results. The fact that it turns sci-fi is just goofy; they did tease that the third film would be set in space! No kidding. With the box office take of this movie, though... who knows if there will be a third Machete movie.
At least there were still things throughout that I enjoyed so I did not hate the movie; I was just disappointed by it. I did enjoy how there were plenty of good-looking women in the film. Alexa Vega certainly has grown up from her Spy Kids days. She is a very pretty lady now. I would have liked more of that character and have some others deleted. I was hoping this'd be one of the best movies of 2013 in my eyes, but nope. Hopefully by the end of this year I'll have a list that will have 10 viable options to make it look good.
I'll be back tomorrow night.
29% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 99 reviews)
Runtime: 107 minutes
Directed by: Robert Rodriguez
Starring: Many people, including Danny Trejo, Mel Gibson, Amber Heard, Sofia Vergara, & Carlos Estevez
From: Open Road
I still remember first seeing the fake Machete trailer back in '07 and I thought it looked awesome. I then enjoyed Machete which I saw twice on the big screen (including once at a drive-in with the ultimate perfect partner in Piranha), the review you can read here. As I did have a lot of fun with the first movie, I was hoping it'd be the same with the sequel. The fact that I only saw it last night is telling, though. The pretty bad reviews turned me off, and even before that people were complaining about how there were too many characters in the film; turns out they were right...
The plot, via myself: Things happen in the beginning, and Machete is brought to the White House to meet the President (Charlie Sheen, acting under the name on his birth certificate) and he has to go down to Mexico to try and take down a bad guy who wants to blow up Washington. A lot happens and it ends up being tied to a guy with the Bond-esque name of Luthur Voz (Gibson). In fact, the movie has a surprising amount to do with a certain Bond film that I won't spoil as it would reveal quite a bit.
It won't be until tonight but when I do write up my opinion of it on Letterboxd, I'll likely give it 2 and a half stars out of 5. That seems most appropriate. There are things I enjoyed but then there are other things that I thought were just stupid, being over the top but in a dumb and insulting way. It went up and down like a rollercoaster. It was bipoloar, which is ironic given that... but that's another spoiler. What counts as a stupid thing was how Walton Goggins, Cuba Gooding Jr., Lady Gaga and Antonio Banderas all played the same character, El Camaleon. That was just a waste.
There indeed proved to be way too many characters in this movie. That certainly did not help what was a mess of a script, where things are chaotic in a poor way and that has to be a big reason why it was such a flick with mixed results. The fact that it turns sci-fi is just goofy; they did tease that the third film would be set in space! No kidding. With the box office take of this movie, though... who knows if there will be a third Machete movie.
At least there were still things throughout that I enjoyed so I did not hate the movie; I was just disappointed by it. I did enjoy how there were plenty of good-looking women in the film. Alexa Vega certainly has grown up from her Spy Kids days. She is a very pretty lady now. I would have liked more of that character and have some others deleted. I was hoping this'd be one of the best movies of 2013 in my eyes, but nope. Hopefully by the end of this year I'll have a list that will have 10 viable options to make it look good.
I'll be back tomorrow night.
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Yep, Another Slight Delay
I will be seeing a big screen movie; I'll be leaving in a matter of minutes to make a short drive to watch Machete Kills. I thought I'd be able to see it in the early evening but I looked today and that changed and I could only watch it in the late evening. Thus, the change in plans.
I WILL be back tomorrow afternoon (probably late afternoon) to talk about that film. Hopefully I enjoy it as much as the first one.
I WILL be back tomorrow afternoon (probably late afternoon) to talk about that film. Hopefully I enjoy it as much as the first one.
Monday, October 21, 2013
Chillerama
Chillerama (2011)
Runtime: 120 minutes
Directed by: Adam Green, Joe Lynch, Adam Rifkin, & Tim Sullivan
Starring: This is a horror anthology, but the most famous faces are Joel David Moore, Eric Roberts, Lin Shaye, Ray Wise, & Kane Hodder
From: Ariescope
This is a horror-comedy anthology I've had on DVD for awhile but I've never watched until tonight. I've heard that the filming of this anthology was a nightmare to film due to it being a low-budget affair and trying to do 4 short movies and put them together with a overarching story... there won't be a Chillerama 2, that is what I gathered.
I wasn't sure what to expect going in. I heard that the overarching story (which ended up also being the final segment of the film) was how the owner of the last drive-in in America was shutting down but not before showing four films in an extravaganza. Right away, I had an issue as there indeed are a decent amount of drive-ins that are still up and running, and trying to say that there are literally none left is pretty stupid. I've been to one in Tampa a few times (including to see Grindhouse, which was pretty awesome and seeing a car full of people go crazy for the ending of Death Proof... it has to be one of my favorite theatre-going experiences) and the Silver Moon Drive-In in Lakeland, I've been to a decent number of times before.
The “plot” is that a drive-in is closing down; it's never said that it's the last one in America, so I don't know why the movie's publicity suggested so... anyhow, the drive-in shows four super-obscure films, that being Wadzilla (yes, Wadzilla), I Was A Teenage Wearbear, The Diary Of Anne Frankenstein, and the final short was supposed to be Deathication (which revolves all around feces) but the final part of the movie is chaos going on at the drive-in. How it all starts... pretty awful and makes no sense, but that's unfortunately par for the course with this film.It involves blue blood (literally; I don't mean a member of an aristocratic background) and a guy who gets his genitals bitten off but not really finding it all that painful.
Wadzilla is about one sperm that becomes giant-sized and attacks New York City. It's set in the 50's. Think that one segment in Woody Allen's Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask) which ended with Woody and a girl being chased by one giant breast, only it was done much better there and that movie is much better than this one. Eric Roberts appears as General Bukkake. Yeah. That's as “clever” and “matutre” as the humor gets. However, I was amused a few times and this ended up being the best segment in the movie.
The Wearbear one... WOW. And I mean WOW in a bad way. This rivals Hatchet III and Only God Forgives as amongst the worst filmmaking and the hardest bit of footage to get through this year. You start off with it being pretty much incomprehensible and you have no idea what in the blue hell is going on; it takes a few minutes to figure it out. Meanwhile, the movie is set in “1962” and yet you see cars from the late 60's, the 70's and even the 80's. This was horrible, and not in the spoof way either; this is shockingly atrocious filmmaking, and it's a MUSICAL; several songs are sung and they're all terrible in the worst ways and oh yeah, it's about gay werewolves. This really sunk the movie and yet even if you skip that segment, this would still be a poor insufferable film to sit through.
The Anne Frankenstein one... the “joke” is that all the actors are speaking legit German, but Joel David Moore (who plays “Hitler”) speaks gibberish that's supposed to be German but isn't. Yeah, it's even less funny than it sounds. It's just loud and overbearing and a complete 180 from being even smirk-worthy, let alone hilarious and a laugh riot.
You see a few minutes of Deathication and it's all about shit, literally. To describe that segment as “shit” is actually offensive to shit. After that, you get the rest of the film, where chaos is happening at the drive-in and while it is quite graphic, it is also quite not good and quite not funny, unless you enjoy a non-stop assault of lazy and uncreative movie references presented and references in the laziest most ham-fisted ways. Oh, and the thing that happens at the drive-in which causes the chaos... via circumstances too lame to get into, people start turning into zombies... horny zombies. Yes. Maybe if you're 13 you'd find it amusing. Otherwise...
Yeah, I hated this film! I now regret purchasing this film back in 2011, although at least the hand-drawn cover is pretty cool. Unfortunately, the movie seems like the result of a bukkake session among the filmmakers (who are all close buddies) and this wankfest is what you ended up with. If you find Troma movies to be too sophisticated and mature then you should see this. Otherwise, this is a must-avoid. I'll be back on Wednesday night, as I really do need a day of recovery after seeing 2 hours of awfulness in a row.
Runtime: 120 minutes
Directed by: Adam Green, Joe Lynch, Adam Rifkin, & Tim Sullivan
Starring: This is a horror anthology, but the most famous faces are Joel David Moore, Eric Roberts, Lin Shaye, Ray Wise, & Kane Hodder
From: Ariescope
This is a horror-comedy anthology I've had on DVD for awhile but I've never watched until tonight. I've heard that the filming of this anthology was a nightmare to film due to it being a low-budget affair and trying to do 4 short movies and put them together with a overarching story... there won't be a Chillerama 2, that is what I gathered.
I wasn't sure what to expect going in. I heard that the overarching story (which ended up also being the final segment of the film) was how the owner of the last drive-in in America was shutting down but not before showing four films in an extravaganza. Right away, I had an issue as there indeed are a decent amount of drive-ins that are still up and running, and trying to say that there are literally none left is pretty stupid. I've been to one in Tampa a few times (including to see Grindhouse, which was pretty awesome and seeing a car full of people go crazy for the ending of Death Proof... it has to be one of my favorite theatre-going experiences) and the Silver Moon Drive-In in Lakeland, I've been to a decent number of times before.
The “plot” is that a drive-in is closing down; it's never said that it's the last one in America, so I don't know why the movie's publicity suggested so... anyhow, the drive-in shows four super-obscure films, that being Wadzilla (yes, Wadzilla), I Was A Teenage Wearbear, The Diary Of Anne Frankenstein, and the final short was supposed to be Deathication (which revolves all around feces) but the final part of the movie is chaos going on at the drive-in. How it all starts... pretty awful and makes no sense, but that's unfortunately par for the course with this film.It involves blue blood (literally; I don't mean a member of an aristocratic background) and a guy who gets his genitals bitten off but not really finding it all that painful.
Wadzilla is about one sperm that becomes giant-sized and attacks New York City. It's set in the 50's. Think that one segment in Woody Allen's Everything You Wanted To Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask) which ended with Woody and a girl being chased by one giant breast, only it was done much better there and that movie is much better than this one. Eric Roberts appears as General Bukkake. Yeah. That's as “clever” and “matutre” as the humor gets. However, I was amused a few times and this ended up being the best segment in the movie.
The Wearbear one... WOW. And I mean WOW in a bad way. This rivals Hatchet III and Only God Forgives as amongst the worst filmmaking and the hardest bit of footage to get through this year. You start off with it being pretty much incomprehensible and you have no idea what in the blue hell is going on; it takes a few minutes to figure it out. Meanwhile, the movie is set in “1962” and yet you see cars from the late 60's, the 70's and even the 80's. This was horrible, and not in the spoof way either; this is shockingly atrocious filmmaking, and it's a MUSICAL; several songs are sung and they're all terrible in the worst ways and oh yeah, it's about gay werewolves. This really sunk the movie and yet even if you skip that segment, this would still be a poor insufferable film to sit through.
The Anne Frankenstein one... the “joke” is that all the actors are speaking legit German, but Joel David Moore (who plays “Hitler”) speaks gibberish that's supposed to be German but isn't. Yeah, it's even less funny than it sounds. It's just loud and overbearing and a complete 180 from being even smirk-worthy, let alone hilarious and a laugh riot.
You see a few minutes of Deathication and it's all about shit, literally. To describe that segment as “shit” is actually offensive to shit. After that, you get the rest of the film, where chaos is happening at the drive-in and while it is quite graphic, it is also quite not good and quite not funny, unless you enjoy a non-stop assault of lazy and uncreative movie references presented and references in the laziest most ham-fisted ways. Oh, and the thing that happens at the drive-in which causes the chaos... via circumstances too lame to get into, people start turning into zombies... horny zombies. Yes. Maybe if you're 13 you'd find it amusing. Otherwise...
Yeah, I hated this film! I now regret purchasing this film back in 2011, although at least the hand-drawn cover is pretty cool. Unfortunately, the movie seems like the result of a bukkake session among the filmmakers (who are all close buddies) and this wankfest is what you ended up with. If you find Troma movies to be too sophisticated and mature then you should see this. Otherwise, this is a must-avoid. I'll be back on Wednesday night, as I really do need a day of recovery after seeing 2 hours of awfulness in a row.
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