Runtime: 96 minutes
Directed by: Robert Longo
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Dina Meyer, Ice-T, Takeshi Kitano, Dolph Lundgren
From: TriStar
A movie I finally saw because of... a meme.
Recently I wondered how many films from the past were set in 2021; I never bothered looking before I saw a meme elsewhere which noted that this infamous bomb was not only set in 2021, but there was a global virus which people were protesting and “Big Pharma” was the enemy. It really seemed like the right time to discover after over a quarter century just why many were left crestfallen once they saw this Cyberpunk movie. The script-which I understand was highly changed by the time it was filmed-was from Cyberpunk God William Gibson... between that and all the cult figures in the cast, this should not have been such a mess.
The general idea seemed fine: in 2021 couriers carry information implanted in their brains. Keanu plays Johnny, who receives data that a Big Pharma corporation don't want public as it relates to the virus... it has nothing in common w/ COVID-19 and instead centers around an idea that loony conspiracy theorists believe but I think is hogwash as there's no credible evidence to believe it's true... although even then, a few unfortunately do believe that 5G is somehow responsible for the pandemic, which is a giant load of poppycock. Anyhow, various people in the underground help out Johnny, including a group that looked like The Lost Boys all grown up. The opening few minutes were already a harbinger of doom: not only in the giant infodump of an opening crawl identify 2021 as being “the second decade of the 21st century” instead of the third, a display notes that January 17th of this year (a week from today as I write this) is on a Thursday instead of Sunday! I know the Internet was not as popular as it is now but no one bothered to check and instead they just guessed?
For a movie that has cult actors like Keanu, Dina Meyer, Ice-T, Takeshi Kitano, Dolph Lundgren, Henry Rollins, and Udo Kier... what a damn shame then that the film was obviously cut (more like butchered) by the studios before it was released-as the final product (I saw the 96 minute version on YouTube and not the longer Japanese version which has some minor differences and a larger role for Kitano, who was woefully underutilized here... even if clearly he phonetically memorized his English dialogue) seemed like parts of the story were missing. That resulted in everything being so muddled. This obviously had a lot of money behind it due to the world that was practically created-along with the CG that is hilariously quaint by modern standards-this should have been far better even if the techno-jargon and other things would also seem quaint.
At least there were plenty of unintentional laughs which helped make this easy to digest. The identity of a character known only as Jones... LORD; it was like they tried to top Kuato from the original Total Recall. An actual real life device of the 90's was named: a Thompson Eyephone, which was some sort of thing you wore on your head... so no, the movie did not predict the iPhone, although like many futuristic works, their version of Skype was presented. Dolph has long hair and a beard as some sort of cybernetic street preacher villain-it was wacky. The performances did vary-Meyer was a highlight... while this wasn't the best I've seen Reeves by any stretch. However, he has an incredible diatribe in the third act where he was PISSED about his current situation and how he instead wants room service w/ all its trappings at a Tokyo hotel-how have I not seen that or much of anything else from Johnny Mnemonic in a meme before?
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