Runtime: A surprisingly long 79 minutes
Directed by: Herschell Gordon Lewis
Starring: A bunch of amateurs, most of whom definitely can't act
From: Box Office Spectaculars... which I am sure is not true in any way here
When a piece of trivia connected to the movie is far more interesting than the movie itself...
In the past I have viewed both Blood Feast and Two Thousand Maniacs on multiple occasions, yet this film was a first time watch for me. About time I did this... even if I found the movie to be utterly tiresome. The first two in the unofficial Blood Trilogy are filled with flaws yet Blood Feast was at least historic in the amount of graphic gore it had and Maniacs was legit fun due to its premise and death scenes. This... what a waste of an interesting premise. The fact that blood outside the body dries out and turns brown instead of red... that is the least of this movie's problems.
There isn't much to the plot of a crazed painter (at least played by a random amateur who looks half-insane and acts rather daffy) who accidentally discovers that blood makes for great paint, and this leads to a few random people being killed. Note that of the Blood Trilogy, this has by far the least amount of gore. The biggest issue isn't even that or some of the acting being straight out of an adult movie in terms of “quality.” No, it is the fact that this d-r-a-g-s due to everything being stretched out to fill just 79 minutes of runtime. This is even worse filmmaking than in the first two movies.
A shame this wasn't better as the general idea is at least amusing, and at least there are some intentional laughs. However, the biggest one came from a truly absurd moment. In one of the many scenes involving water cycles, a random guy is on one and our villain is in a boat, heading straight towards him w/ a harpoon. This guy never jumps off the cycle into the water! He is just frozen there, yelling like an A-hole; it reminded me of the streamroller scene in the first Austin Powers. The aforementioned piece of trivia I learned last night: in the opening credits, Robert Sinise was listed as the editor; he edited every movie in the Blood Trilogy, something I somehow never noticed until going to IMDb to see if the obvious thought was true... yes, his son actually IS who you think it is. It is amazing to me this interesting piece of trivia never crossed my path until yesterday.
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