Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin

Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)

Runtime: 99 long minutes

Directed by: William Eubank

Starring: Emily Bader, Roland Buck III, Dan Lippert, Jaye Ayres-Brown, Tom Nowicki

From: Paramount Players/Blumhouse

This isn’t MY Paranormal Activity!

Truth be told, there are lists I’ve created on Letterboxd where I discuss franchises-and those lists will forever be incomplete because it’s been determined by me that viewing those installments would just be infuriate me by (among other things) totally waste my time. As I know I’m the only one who really cares about such things, that’s why it’s not a big deal.

In hindsight, there was no need to see this unrelated sequel which involves no characters from the preceding movies, paranormal or not. A young lady named Margot is followed by a truly unendurable dude named Chris (and a random sound dude whose distinguishing traits are “he’s awkwardly annoying” and “he’s really tall”) who film her finding the family that abandoned her at a hospital as a baby. I don’t categorize this as found footage; many moments break that illusion. Even if it was… this motion picture set at an Amish community-I suppose this community won’t complain too hard if you make a bad movie filled with dumb, irritating characters where their sect is involved w/ demons.

Even if this was called Next of Kin and did not have the Paranormal Activity name attached to it, this movie would be bad. I’m glad it’s not just Next of Kin, if only because there’s two much better films from the 80’s w/ that title… either the slow-burn Aussie thriller from 1982, or the movie from ’89 where Patrick Swayze, Bill Paxton, and Liam Neeson are a trio of hillbilly siblings (!) from Appalachia. There are some moments that aren’t bad and the snowy landscape of rural New York State provides some nice scenery.

Otherwise, this movie was just lame and besides not following the found footage format AND added in unnecessary jump scare noises (no, really), they couldn’t even be arsed to set up a camera to film events at night when everyone’s sleeping. Your feelings on the Paranormal Activity are almost irrelevant, except that you’d likely be even more offended. As is, while I know some out there enjoyed the film, personally I couldn’t recommend it to anyone.