The Terror

The Terror (1963)

Runtime: 81 minutes

Directed by: A number of people, as explained below

Starring: Boris Karloff, Jack Nicholson, Dick Miller, Sandra Knight, Dorothy Neumann, Jonathan Haze

From: AIP

The Terror is better as seen in clips during the final act of Targets. The circumstances of its production and how it played into Karloff starring in Targets are best encapsulated in the picture's Wiki page. The movie was watched on YouTube as an account created a faux drive-in experience where it played before Corman's version of The Masque of the Red Death-a movie I know is better from a YouTube viewing last September. More than one Roger Corman picture will be seen between now and Halloween as it seems a fitting tribute.

As Corman pinched pennies so hard that Abraham Lincoln would squeal, of course he would have the idea to use the sets of a movie just-finished (The Raven) and two of its stars to create a whole new movie. Boris Karloff returned as did Jack Nicholson. Corman shot four days of random footage as there was only the bare outlines of the story, leaving it to others to piece something together via second-unit footage. Well, that took nine months and a number of directors. I've heard differing amounts but going by Wiki, there was:

Francis Ford Coppola
Dennis Jakob
Monte Hellman
Jack Hill
Nicholson himself, although that's been called into dispute by Hill

Karloff was supposed to receive $15,000 if this made $150,000. It didn't so he was miffed but he got paid the dough for starring in Targets. The film's Wiki page explains it all and to be frank, it is more interesting than the movie itself, pieced together like Frankenstein's Monster. It should be a compliment that The Terror is not completely disjointed, although the ideas presented in the plot aren't fully realized, the plot spins its wheels at time to make it feature-length & two characters had to literally explain the full story to the audience.

Nicholson-who did not show the prodigious talent he would later in his career-was a French soldier who encounters a mysterious woman (Sandra Knight, Jack's wife at the time. Yes, he actually was married once) tied to a castle owned by Karloff, who has Dick Miller as his majordomo. The film only has two other characters. The Terror had nice sets, a nice cast and sometimes a nice atmosphere; a shame that the meandering story understandably has its issues. Corman alone has done far worse than this motion picture. At the same time, curiosity over the production history & what it produced is really the only reason you need to check the film out, unless you want to see its M. Night-level plot twists.

The Killer's Game

The Killer’s Game (2024)

Runtime: 104 minutes

Directed by: J.J. Perry

Starring: Quite the cast

From: Lionsgate

If you want Great Value Guy Ritchie/Tarantino/John Wick/Smokin’ Aces…

Truth be told, it wasn’t a surprise when I learned that director J.J. Perry gave us the Netflix movie Day Shift; this has those vibes. The main reason for me to see what likely would have gone DTV or streaming if not for last year’s strikes: the cast. It’s full of B-action and B-movie actors: Dave Bautista, Sofia Boutella, Terry Crews, Scott Adkins, Marko Zaror, Pom Klementieff, Ben Kingsley, Alex Kingston, and even WWE’s Drew McIntyre.

The plot concerns hitman Bautista developing a relationship w/ Boutella but discovering he has a real-life terminal illness so he pays for a hit on himself, only there are complications… yeah, it’s all absurd. Imagine a multiverse where in the 90’s Rupert Wainwright would have directed this w/ Wesley Snipes as the lead, or in the early aughts, John Woo directing Michael Keaton; this based on a novel script has been around for that long. Subsequently, is that why it feels like Ritchie or Tarantino lite, complete with character introductions? For crying out loud, this even uses a song that was in Kill Bill, Vol. 1!

Perhaps I am just too old-mid 40’s-but this is just a goofy, crude film filled with garish stereotypes and certainly tries hard—too hard, IMO. The humor regrettably did not land for me all that often. The cast does try-some just have roles that were smaller than I would have preferred. Many do like this claptrap more than me, so YMMV. On the other hand, everyone can agree: this has horrid CG blood, made worse by how frequently it’s seen. The Killer’s Game may not look so bad on the small screen, where I imagine it will do decent business.

 

Errementari: The Blacksmith and the Devil

Errementari: The Blacksmith and the Devil (2017)

Runtime: 98 minutes

Directed by: Paul Urkijo Alijo

Starring: Kandido Uranga, Uma Bracaglia, Eneko Sagardoy, Ramon Agirre, Jose Roman Argoitia

From: Many different French & Spanish companies

Not only this is folk horror, but in an extinct variation of a particular ethnic tongue. For a few years now, this picture has been in my Netflix queue; about time I pulled the trigger. The Spanish/French production was set and filmed in the Basque region-to be brief, the Basque are an ethnic group from that part of the world who have their own distinct culture. This 19th century tale is not only based on local folklore, it's in a dialect of Basque from the time that is now extinct. 

Turns out, I enjoyed the film more than some & now there are regrets that it wasn't streamed much sooner by me. It's a particular version of an Indo-European story, The Smith and the Devil. In this case, a blacksmith makes a deal w/ a demon for a particular reason, but things go wrong. Years later, the blacksmith is an outcast in a poor Basque town in 1843. When an 8 year old girl stumbles onto his land... I'll just say that in fact a demon is a supporting character and not reveal much more.

It's a movie I dug from the very beginning. The foggy forest setting was awesome. I enjoyed the characters and the dark nature of the plot. It had great lighting throughout and sometimes scenes were bathed in colored light for a particular reason. The little girl was an outcast herself and I felt great sympathy due to how poorly the rest of the town treated her. The music, the introduction of dark humor in the second act that increased until the finale, the lore, it all enthralled me. The folklore presented all had to be period-accurate. After all, there's lore surrounding demons and... CHICKPEAS. Don't worry, it's humorous rather than intelligence-insulting.

Many may not be as over the moon for Errementari as I was; that is all good but for those who are intrigued by my comments, it's always worth a shot. Even getting to hear the Basque language was a rare treat. I'll be in the minority here but give me modern films like this instead of “elevated horror”, “fan service crap” or “over the top grotesque gore” anytime.

Cyclone

Cyclone (1978)

Runtime: I saw the English-language 118-minute version

Directed by: Rene Cardona, Jr.

Starring: Arthur Kennedy, Carroll Baker, Lionel Stander, Andreas Garcia, Hugo Stiglitz

From: CONACINE/Productora Filmica Real

Imagine Hitchcock’s Lifeboat if it had exploitation elements, such as sharks and a rather gross dog death.

Early in 2022 I purchased The Cardona Collection from Vinegar Syndrome; it was a trio of films from Mexican exploitation director Rene Cardona, Jr. For Spooky Season 2022 I reviewed The Bermuda Triangle, an amusing aquatic-based tale. As I’m me, it took two years for me to see the second film in that set. That is despite hearing about Cyclone from the Pure Cinema Podcast even before VS released The Cardona Collection.

To clarify, the disc has both an English-language and Spanish-language version; the disc said there’s differences between the two but heck if I know what they were. Regardless, the English cut was selected. A tourist boat, a fishing vessel, and a plane all go down via the titular event that suddenly changed course. Is it a spoiler to mention that all those survivors converge and that it becomes rather miserable the longer they are lost at sea? There’s a shark attack early on but yes they do eventually return. The film is 2 hours long and even by my standards, is leisurely-paced.

That said, the effects of the scenario are presented well; it is horrifying, a few rough choices are made & some characters become barbarians for the purpose of attempting to survive. The cast is better than expected. After all, there’s distinguished actors like Arthur Kennedy, Carroll Baker, & Lionel Stander. Kennedy was dubbed in the English-language cut—perhaps this indicated his opinion of the production but it’s possible his health was the reason for that. In any regard, many will be amused that this features TWO actors from Fulci’s Zombie: Olga Karalatos and Stefania D’Amario. As it’s a Cardona picture, OF COURSE Hugo Stiglitz is involved.

The movie won’t be to everyone’s tastes; if you can accept the slow stretches, the wild ending is worth the wait. Something I’m predisposed to enjoying was the Riz Ortolani score; the title track is quite a bit incredible, to be frank. It includes a slapping bass line, which will always tickle my fancy. Maybe it will for you also.

 

I Discuss Apollo 13: Survival

It's a 2024 Netflix documentary. Thankfully, their documentaries tend to be better than their feature films: 

Netflix's documentaries typically are quite a bit better than their fictional movies. I can't say “always” as scrutiny over such efforts as their expose on Malaysian Airlines Flight 370 informs me that it and others of its type are claptrap best left avoided. The series lasting multiple episodes also give me pause; however, a 97-minute piece on the Apollo 13 mission done clinically, filled with archival footage and the only narration is from archival interviews: it gave me confidence. It has to beat even given a minute of my time to Uglies, a picture that sounds like a catastrophe, yet another bad Netflix Original Movie based on a wacky conceit and hilariously to me, directed by McG. I'll pass, thank you very much.

Thankfully, Apollo 13: Survival was what I wanted. While the focus was more on Jim Lovell and his family instead of the other astronauts, otherwise there is little complaint with the simple presentation of this tale. Presumably many know the story from the Ron Howard film (not seen by me since the late 90's) but in case you aren't familiar, spoilers won't be given. The word “survival” does suggest that the mission does not go as planned...

I'm the simple sort who is fine w/ a straightforward documentary that after the opening is presented chronologically and is free from flash aside from some explanatory graphics. Not only are the improbable odds shown, the impact the story had on the entire world was made abundantly clear. As I've seen others mention, this would make quite the double-feature with 2019's Apollo 11. At least some things that Netflix produces is of interest to my esoteric tastes.

Mallrats

Mallrats (1995)

Runtime: 94 minutes

Directed by: Kevin Smith

Starring: Besides Jay & Silent Bob, there's Jason Lee, Jeremy London, Claire Forlani, and Shannen Doherty (RIP)

From: Universal/Gramercy

Growing up means realizing that the two leads here are intolerable man-children!

Truth be told, I’ve always thought that Kevin Smith is hit or miss. Most of what I’ve seen from him was before Letterboxd but it’s not just me enjoying Clerks and thinking that his films in the last 15 years have been abominations. I didn’t even care for Chasing Amy at the time; hearsay tells me that it’s aged exactly as poorly as expected. The idea of going through his filmography to confirm or change my opinions from the past—won’t be happening. However, this was one always looked at favorably to me, plus I can tip my cap to the late Shannen Doherty. To clarify, the theatrical version was streamed via a Prime rental.

What a surprise it was realizing that the two leads (Brodie Bruce and T.S. Quint; yes, obvious references) are both unlikable slackers with no ambition-especially the former-who somehow pulled Doherty and Claire Forlani, both rightfully dumped for acting like tools, and as a middle-aged man a few years older than Michael Rooker in this film, my amusement at those two college-aged tools is not the same as in the past. Rather, despite the way they were written, the women characters were more likable and enjoyable. For being a jerk, I also preferred Rooker’s character as at least he acted like an adult. Of course, no complaints w/ Stan Lee playing himself in a cameo back when that was rare.

For all my complaints, there are still laughs to be had; while it’s an opportunity for Smith to further bag about his comic book fandom via several gags, at least Jay and Silent Bob made me chuckle as supporting characters. There’s still various gross-out gags for those that love such things. Yet, I always remembered hearing Smith carping that he wasn’t allowed to use certain vulgar phrases in the movie. Sounds rather childish given that Mallrats still has a rather uncomfortable subplot involving a 15-year-old girl. Perhaps there’s a reason that there are plenty of Smith characters that can be described as man-children…

I hate to be mean to Kevin; in recent years he’s admitted mental health struggles related to childhood trauma. Be that as it may, going through the rest of his filmography suddenly has become less likely. I’ll always have fond memories for Clerks but as I’ve done for years now, ignoring his current output is a definite. At least this has sailboat and views of a 90’s mall, which is something I’ll have nostalgic feelings for due to remembering the local mall in my youth.

An American Werewolf in Paris

An American Werewolf in Paris (1997)

Runtime: 98 long minutes

Directed by: Anthony Waller

Starring: Tom Everett Scott, Julie Delpy, and a bunch of no-names

From: Hollywood Pictures

Even worse than what I was expecting.

Last night, I revisited An American Werewolf in London (while I didn’t write my best review when I rated the film back in 2017, a new one won’t be posted); now there’s a very good motion picture which not only delivered the scares and the laughs, but I cared about the relationship between David and Alex as the time spent w/ the ill-fated European traveler and his London nurse was worthwhile and thus it wasn’t an issue that the all-timer transformation scene was almost an hour into the picture. The viewer sincerely hopes that David Naughton will be Makin’ It…

Both that and this are on Prime; that spurned me to finally view Paris—a film avoided due to all the bad buzz ever since its release. Curiosity got the best of me, and wow was the movie bad. Three self-admitted American thrill-seeking douchebags travel to Paris; Tom Everett Scott saves Julie Delpy from an Eiffel Tower suicide jump via bungee jumping (don’t ask; it also looks horrendous yet it’s not the worst effect in the movie by any regard) and well, she’s a werewolf. Its connection w/ London solely consists of ripping off several ideas, only done as a pale imitation.

The story is lame (the “clan” of werewolves present have a world domination plot!) & aside from a few chuckles the “humor” was embarrassing/cringe-worthy instead of funny. Some director choices (such as cinematography that at times is totally blown out) was certainly a choice. The new lore they have for werewolves doesn’t work either. However, the biggest blight on the picture: the CG. Due to technological limitations most of it from this era has aged like milk. In Paris, it is offensively bad—and as plenty of lycanthropes are seen, the viewer gets the “treat” of viewing those visuals often.

Even on its own, An American Werewolf in Paris is a terrible 90’s horror movie. If you’re like me and view it immediately after London, the sequel is just insulting to everyone involved w/ the original. Heck, it’s even insulting to the grave of Jim Morrison-again, please don’t ask. It fails at everything, from missing the blending of humor & horror to sympathy for the leads to totally wasting the talents of Delpy. Never again will I subject myself to this misery.

House of Frankenstein

House of Frankenstein (1944)

Runtime: 71 minutes

Directed by: Erle C. Kenton

Starring: Boris Karloff, Lon Chaney, Jr., J. Carrol Naish, John Carradine, Anne Gwynne

From: Universal

Even if it’s not Jason Voorhees, a horror picture still had to be discussed on the evening of Friday the 13th. One featuring Frankenstein’s Monster, Dracula, The Wolf Man & Boris Karloff as a stereotypical mad scientist sounded at least more promising than the movie’s antecedent-Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man, viewed last October and left me lukewarm. 

It is, although it can be rather segmented at times. Karloff and his hunchbacked friend escape from jail via circumstances. Circumstances also led them to Dracula’s body, part of a traveling horror exhibit. They also encounter the body of Frankenstein’s Monster and The Wolfman, in the spot they landed at due to the conclusion of Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man. Karloff has a rather Grand Guignol plan for exacting revenge on those who stopped his attempts to carry on the work of Dr. Frankenstein. While Larry Talbot is rather fatalistic about his fate, Daniel finds a love in… well, the old term was “Gypsy” but I hear they say it's a slur (and Lord knows it has negative connotations now anyhow) so instead the proper term is “Romani.”

The picture is not that frightening even in comparison to the rest of the franchise. Be that as it may, it still had nice sets & matte paintings which set the mood, as did the rainy/foggy scenes. Most importantly for me, not only was it nice to see Karloff, Lon Chaney, Jr., John Carradine, and J. Carrol Naish (as Daniel), they were all in an entertaining yarn only 71 minutes in length. It’s not the best movie featuring those Universal Monsters nor is it the best usage of them; foreknowledge of this may set your expectations in check and thus enjoy this as a tolerable horror sequel which still provides entertainment & the appropriate vibes.

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice (2024)

78% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 285 reviews)

Runtime: 105 minutes

Directed by: Tim Burton

Starring: The returning crew, plus Jenna Ortega, Justin Theroux, Willem Dafoe & Monica Belucci

From: Warner Bros.

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice thankfully wasn't like leaving a cake out in the rain...

Beetlejuice is a film that has been viewed by me since childhood; sure, not that often as an adult but it's a film that has still held up even in 2024. Naturally, the news of a sequel 36 years later gave me great pause. I've avoided the Bad Tim Burton era entirely, hearsay's been enough to stay away. Yet, curiosity won out and someone did ask me last month if I would see the juice loose again, so the afterlife was visited once again; thankfully it was a journey worth taking.

I'll be cagey about plot specifics. As presented in the trailer, new and returning characters return to that familiar bucolic little town for someone's funeral. Hopefully people knew which person from the first wasn't asked to return, and why! Lydia now has a teen daughter-Astrid-but they're estranged and the viewer gets to see more of the afterlife than before.

Between the viewing last night and my writing this review today, time and thought did help improve my thoughts in regard to the film. Yeah, not all the humor landed nor did all the big swings BB took resulted in hits-one scene during the conclusion was too lengthy. Then, I realized that I shouldn't look at the deliberately irritating character so poorly as that was the point and they were as much a caricature as some were in the OG picture. This had to juggle several balls in the air but it wasn't as many as in Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire & was not as much a mess either. As long as you can accept that a character or two won't appear too often...

What I definitely appreciate is that this avoids many of the modern movie tropes which just ruins films. The returning characters feel similar to what they were 36 years ago; “becoming more PC” was thankfully a direction they ran away from. The new faces were all interesting and fit in this macabre world. The Danny Elfman score was fine although what left the biggest impression was the soundtrack. Instead of Harry Belafonte, it was different music from a different era. Yes, I knew all those songs—except for the “post-rock” tune. That'd be because it's from a horribly pretentious band that tries and fails to be Pink Floyd... otherwise, the soundtrack was pretty rad.

Arguably the most important aspect: Beetlejuice Beetlejuice possessing the same Gothic, delightfully spooky, ghoulishly charming as in the first. In that regard, yes that was accomplished. Also critical: this was done without the usage of constant fan service moments. Aside from a popular supporting part returning, it rarely felt indebted to poking people in the ribs every two minutes by directing referencing what was done in the 80's. Instead, it was zany new ideas and references to pictures that the general public would find obscure.

If they HAD to make this sequel, thank heavens it wasn't one that sullied the memory of the original Beetlejuice. Heck, it's become increasingly rare that I like a popular new film as much as the consensus here; this is an occasion where I do. That's me keeping it real...

Afraid

Afraid (2024)

22% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 45 reviews)

Runtime: 84 minutes

Directed by: Chris Weitz

Starring: John Cho, Katherine Waterston, Havana Rose Liu, Lukita Maxwell, Keith Carradine

From: Columbia/Blumhouse

I can't believe it's not Blum... wait, it actually IS a Blumhouse movie. Before randomly seeing this film (thankfully at the Disney Springs AMC at an auditorium, meaning I at least had a fine dinner while watching a lousy picture) a trailer was never viewed, let alone any advertisement. Thus, it was quite the revelation that this was from both Columbia and Blumhouse. The latter's reputation has fallen in my eyes without viewing any of their recent product. All the bad things I've heard about Tarot, Night Swim, Imagination-more than enough motivation for me to flee disappointing pictures that waste what could have been at the very least an inventive concept.

At least now I can speak with a bit of authority that a modern PG-13 Blumhouse film is rather lame; M3GAN this is not. John Cho receives an AI device (AIA) that is installed in his house. As the movie loudly bellows on several occasions, it's much more complex than Alexa. Expect many references to “data sets” and other hip buzz words. The expected happens: at first the family loves the assistance but soon... I wasn't exactly expecting the subplot involving some mysterious figures living in Walter White's RV, but what a hysterical resolution when that is finally revealed in the climax. Presumably it's to dunk on that motion picture, but Afraid showed AIA showing a movie on Netflix for the kids—it was THE EMOJI MOVIE, no kidding.

This did try to be modern and address such 2020's issues as creepy AI images, deepfakes, revenge porn, children having too much “screen time,” fears of those devices listening in on you/becoming obtrusive, etc. Unfortunately, it seemed as if AIA also wrote this script! The story, the dialogue, the characters, it's all so odd and disjointed—Afraid is only 84 minutes long yet this was a case where perhaps a few more minutes were needed, but that wouldn't have solved all its problems. I imagine all those fans of David Dastmalchian won't exactly be thrilled by the weirdo character w/ Moe Howard haircut who only appears in a few scenes anyhow. I know Letterboxd members would have preferred if I had seen Havana Rose Liu in Bottoms and all I can say about Keith Carradine's (!) appearance is I hope he was paid well.

Afraid is rather dopey and starts to fall apart in the final act; that said, the final 10 or so minutes were such a preposterous mess that it became rather funny, and the direction they went for the denouement: amazing. That's why I can't get that mad over this flick; besides the conclusion, the cast (especially Cho and Katherine Waterston) do try their hardest. Who knows how much modern horror I'll see this season but at least for 2024 Blumhouse, there will be no more of that.

Grim Prairie Tales

Grim Prairie Tales (1990)

Runtime: 86 minutes

Directed by: Wayne Coe

Starring: James Earl Jones (RIP), Brad Dourif, Will Hare, Marc McClure, William Atherton

From: East-West Film Partners

RIP James Earl Jones

Yesterday I went and saw a bad movie theatrically; that will be discussed tomorrow. After the screening, it wasn't until arriving back home that I looked at Twitter and saw the unfortunate news. Even as a kid, I knew that him (for example) guest-starring on a TV show was a big deal and he was someone I knew as the voice of both Mufasa & Darth Vader. As an adult it was nice to see him in films like The Hunt for Red October and Conan the Barbarian; as it's Spooky Season, I've already reviewed the amazingly bad Exorcist II: The Heretic and I've known of Grim Prairie Tales for years, about time to discuss a Horror-Western (I wish there was more of those) which is also an anthology.

The premise is simple: Brad Dourif-an appropriate actor for this time of year-is a clerk who is traveling through the desert. He encounters bounty hunter Jones and they literally sit around the campfire telling each other scary stories. The premise has always intrigued; sadly, due to what I presume are those nebulous “rights issues” again, the movie has never advanced past the laserdisc era. While there are copies on YouTube, via the “Bowels of the Internet” I found the 87-minute version of the picture rather than the 83-minute cut on YouTube.

What a shame then that among the quartet of stories, none of them I would say are even good, let alone great. While each has a moment or two, overall they are all some combination of too short, too muddled, lacking in scares, and all have weak conclusions. Yet, I'd like to think that this just gets a passing grade from me not because I want to give my props to Jones but because he and Dourif spend plenty of time interacting w/ each other and with actors of that caliber, no surprise that those sequences are the clear highlight of the film.

It's always nice seeing the likes of Will Hare, Marc McClure & William Atherton. It amused me to discover that two future famous cinematographers worked on the film. Janusz Kaminski made his feature-film debut here as the director of photography; only a few years later he started his still-continuing partnership w/ Spielberg. One of the grips: Wally Pfister. He was the DoP in many cheap 90's films (including SOFTCORE, no kidding) before he began his long partnership w/ Nolan. As flawed as this movie is, I'd still love to see it in HD or at the very least, a film print that someone stumbles across.

It's bizarre to note that an anthology film has better wraparound segment footage than the short stories between those wraparound segments, but 'tis true here. Be that as it may, it was still nice to finally experience Grim Prairie Tales after all these years. What a career Jones had both stage & screen. I can't be too sad that he lived to the age of 93 and millions around the world have appreciated his talents; again, RIP.

The Shadow

The Shadow (1994)

Runtime: 108 minutes

Directed by: Russell Mulcahy

Starring: A rather nice cast

From: Universal

In this special early Monday posting of a review, another recommendation was viewed by me. I’ll return to Spooky Season next time but yesterday a Letterboxd mutual left a comment on my (brief) review of Batman Begins and noted that the plot to this film is rather similar than that. I don’t care for Batman Begins but I’d have to view the entire Nolan Trilogy again to explain in better detail why if it wasn’t for Heath Ledger, all three films likely wouldn’t be rated highly by me… I’d just rather not invest all that time to do so, at least not anytime soon.

Regardless, The Shadow I remember at the time as a movie which didn’t do well at the box office but later was reappraised and found more love. Of course, in ’94 I was not familiar with the pulp character created in the 1930’s. Incidentally, as an adult I’ve played The Shadow pinball table at special gaming events where diehard fans can bring their own tables. The backglass image of Alec Baldwin—to be honest, it looks more like William Baldwin! Ironically, The Shadow in disguise does resemble William, although that image was of Lamont Cranston instead of his alter ego.

You know, the backstory to Cranston IS rather similar to Bruce Wayne in Batman Begins: a rich playboy learns mystical secrets from an ethnic character and becomes a crimefighter superhero in disguise. Here, a key difference is that Cranston was a vile villain-with an astounding head of hair-before he was reformed and uses his mind control to combat “the underworld.” Suddenly, John Lone shows up as a descendant of Genghis Khan with the same abilities so that’s enough motivation for him to take over the world. Meanwhile, Penelope Ann Miller is a dame who has the powers of telepathy.

The motivations of Khan & his plan of world domination—it doesn’t matter in this case how complicated or not it is. Rather, it’s the many attributes this has: the sweet score from Jerry Goldsmith that had “contributions” from Jellybean Benitez, of all people… the cast which has everyone from Penelope Ann Miller, Jonathan Winters and Peter Boyle to Tim Curry, Ian McKellan, and some famous faces that appear briefly—the 1930’s setting/vibe, and the awesome old-school tricks that brought the setting to life, from the matte paintings to the miniatures; the nascent CG hasn’t aged so well but it’s 30 years ago and didn’t appear often. Otherwise, it’s a marvel of production design.

Most 21st century superhero movies aren’t for me; give me pulp adventures like this that aren’t convoluted yet still are interesting with a flawed hero, competent villains (sometimes, even henchmen), female love interests that aren’t just damsels in distress but aren’t infuriating “girlbosses” either, a movie that is lit well despite the preponderance of night scenes—it does make me nostalgic for an era long-gone in modern movie-making.

Another nice recommendation, in other words.

 

Vegas Vacation

Vegas Vacation (1997)

Runtime: 93 minutes

Directed by: Stephen Kessler

Starring: The usual Vacation crew, plus Wayne Newton, Marisol Nichols, Wallace Shawn & Sid Caesar

From: Warner Bros.

A change of pace was needed for the weekend; so was me finally viewing this film in full when since the late 90's, I'd see it in bits and pieces, usually at someone else's house when it was on TV. The reason why it never happened until now despite experiencing the first three Vacation pictures in my youth: the middling opinion of it when it was released-how it was “the worst” of the series. What I saw wasn’t bad yet finally I had the motivations.

Turns out, it’s not bad, especially by modern comedy standards. Admittedly, Clark W. Griswold is dumber than in the other films by a notable margin; them leaning into that wasn’t always to my liking. Be that as it may, after the first 15 minutes or so, the film improves and there are occasional laugh, even if at times it seemed as if there’s a lack of payoff to jokes. As Clark becomes addicted to gambling, Ellen has a fling w/ Wayne Newton (his performance was a highlight) & Rusty and Audrey have their own adventures, the film is watchable.

Of course, Randy Quaid as Cousin Eddie and Miriam Flynn as Catherine are assets and IMO, it was nice seeing what Las Veas looked like back in the late 90’s. The family stays at The Mirage, a hotel just closed two months ago as in several years, a new Hard Rock hotel will occupy that space. Other places have changed in the 25 years plus so that was a gas for me, along with the total boomer soundtrack.

Siegfried & Roy appear in a scene; they are also iconic to Las Vegas, although “the accident” and the subsequent revelations that their famed white tigers probably weren’t treated all that well… unfortunate. At least there’s Wallace Shawn & I’ve always laughed at Nick Pappagiorgio--and it was nice to see how Rusty acquired the most famous movie fake ID until McLovin.

It is the worst of the four Vacation films-no, I’m not counting the reboot; from all appearances I’d consider 2015’s Vacation an affront against God so there’s no need for me to ever tackle that. Vegas Vacation was entertaining enough for me-even if it’s time in comparison to the other three-that a full viewing should have happened long before September, 2024.

 

May the Devil Take You Too

May the Devil Take You Too (Sebelum Iblis Menjemput: Ayat Dua) (2020)

Runtime: 110 minutes

Directed by: Timo Tjahjanto

Starring: Chelsea Islan, Widika Darsih Sidmore, Baskara Mahendra, Hadijah Shahab, Lutesha

From: A few different Indonesian companies

Shudder’s streaming channel on their platform dictated what I watched last night. Originally I had something else in mind-not related to horror-but I looked tuned into the Shudder app on my TV to discover if a film was about to start. It was this, the sequel to something I saw on Netflix six months ago. In short, the first picture regarded a family patriarch who made a Faustian bargain to achieve fame & fortune; eventually, that turned out as well as you’d suspect. Too was a film likely to have been watched sometime this year, so it made sense to stay on that channel.

The sequel returns lead girl Alfie and a step-sister. Via circumstances, they are forced to help some youths who are dealing with a similar problem; cue up the pale black-haired ghosts who vomit black bile! Those are a cliché and Asian horror is not a subgenre I’ve dived too deep into. Be that as it may, while it was like the first in being too long at almost two hours and there’s not as much gore as you’d expect for a picture directed by Timo Tjahjanto, this doesn’t mean there was a lack of entertainment, thrills, and chills from a movie mainly set in one location and was built as a thrill ride. The poor CG was regrettable, but… 

Nice atmosphere, a lack of cheap jump-scares, and expanding the story told in the first film made this a worthy sequel. To be frank, I do prefer the action films from Tjahjanto, which meant that the inclusion of action elements was welcomed by me. The Night Comes for Us is an extremely bloody and visceral action film well worth seeing on Netflix for genre fans; the recent news that Tjahjanto will make his Hollywood debut by directing Nobody 2 is delightful & increases my desire to see the sequel. With any luck, this sojourn to Hollywood will turn out better than it has for many foreign directors throughout history.

Curucu: Beast of the Amazon

Curucu, Beast of the Amazon (1956)

Runtime: 75 minutes

Directed by: Curt Siodmak

Starring: John Bromfield, Beverly Garland, Tom Payne, Harvey Chalk, Larri Thomas

From: Universal

This had to be the nadir of the Universal Monster movies. It was a film unknown to me until Vinegar Syndrome Labs released it awhile back. The disc wasn’t picked up by me; rather, a movie that can’t legally be streamed anywhere was found by me at ::site redacted:: and as I wanted to see more 50’s film during Spooky Season this year as it hadn’t really been done the past several years…

Curucu, Beast of the Amazon was set and filmed in Brazil; this provided the few highlights for me. What sunk the picture: the lead of the film had a great name (Rock Dean) but what a chauvinistic jerk he was, a misogynistic pig who upon seeing Beverly Garland as a doctor, notes that “she couldn’t get a man so she settled for a career.” He said this about a doctor! His behavior does not improve from there; he’s a womanizer, constantly condescending towards her, belittling, and was just someone that sucked the life out of the film for me.

To be fair, the plot itself had its issues. A monster (what a goofy-looking costume it was) is terrorizing plantation workers in Brazil—oh yeah, there’s also colonialism involved in seeing a bunch of white A-holes not only bossing around Brazilians, but Brazilians from the Amazonian jungles. Slab Bulkhead… excuse me, Rock Dean is tasked with a trek into the jungles to find this monster while Garland tags along to find one of those miracle cure drugs a la Medicine Man. Expect plenty of stock footage-including that of water buffalos… yes, the animals from Southeast Asia!-and trapsing around the jungle rather than any horror scares.

The film has some moments-like a fun final shot-but when I wasn’t bored, I was irritated by the succubus that was the lead; no offense to the actor (John Bromfield), the character was just grisly death for me. Plenty do like the film at least a little more than me so if you can’t track down the stream like I did, Vinegar Syndrome still has the disc available for purchase. Sometime later this season I’ll view more Universal horror from back in the day-hopefully something more to my tastes.

 

Calamity of Snakes

Calamity of Snakes (1982… or 1983)

Runtime: 86 minutes

Directed by: William Cheung Kei

Starring: Kao Yuen, Lo Pi-Ling, Wei Ping-Ao, Ou-Yang Sha-Fei, Chou Chung-Lien

From: Chi He Film Company/Kee Woo Film (H.K.) Co.

 
Those that are virulently against animal cruelty, please stay clear of Calamity of Snakes. I’ve known of this picture from Taiwan for awhile now. On a whim, this was experienced via Arrow’s streaming site. This was despite the foreknowledge that many snakes would be shown killed on camera. Boy does it ever: skinned alive, chopped by shovels/knives, flattened by construction equipment, sliced via samurai sword, lit ablaze, killed by a mongoose, etc. Perhaps you can wish for a curse on the film’s producers a la the curse that was marked on the heels of this film & their minions for killing a literal pit of snakes rather than lose any time on luxury apartments being built.

The rich A-hole boss DEMANDED that building be done in 8 months and by gum that’ll happen. Who needs the proper authorities to safely dispose and relocate them, right? Big mistake. The wacky residents of those apartments-including an overweight woman who is constantly the source of fat jokes, to the point that there’s a visual joke comparing her to a hog-will have a really bad time in the final act. Note that literally hundreds of snakes are shown throughout; of course some are rubber but many are clearly alive so if you are more petrified of them than Indiana Jones & have ophidiophobia, this will be more terrifying to you than The Exorcist.

Calamity of Snakes was designed to be absurd. Besides the lo-fi effects of snakes obviously being tossed onto the ground/someone via unseen hands, on two occasions the viewer witnesses the delight of giant pythons flying around in the air and using its own body as a weapon as if it’s a martial arts opponent. There is a literal battle in a warehouse which was a treat. The snake deaths are regrettable, especially when the movie lingers on it.

Otherwise, this is a wacky picture not to take that seriously-what a fiery finale. After all, it is filled with soundtrack tunes, a tune from the album that the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra did of classical music in a disco style, and a song from The Alan Parsons Project, all unauthorized. I mean, two songs from The Dawn of the Dead, two from Maniac, For Your Eyes Only, The Eyes of Laura Mars… thankfully, some random person on YouTube noted all the examples of this as I couldn’t have ID’ed them all myself.

Those that want to view something wacky and desire something from a foreign country for whatever reasons, Calamity of Snakes could be for you. One last note: those that believe the English title is simply proclaiming a group of the same animal like a murder of crows or a gaggle of geese does… incorrect. There are several different words in that case, such as pit or den (which would have worked here) but I can’t explain why they choose calamity besides it being a great word in general. The original title translated in English I looked up on two different sites and both are hilarious:

RUM SNAKE WAR
UH HUH, SNAKE FIGHTS

Both are applicable to this film…

The Hellstrom Chronicles

The Hellstrom Chronicle (1971)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Walon Green/Ed Spiegel

Starring: Lawrence Pressman

From: Wolper Pictures

A faux apocalyptic documentary that uses great real-life insect macrophotography to prove its point? Why the heck not? This could be the wackiest entry on my list for Spooky Season this year. If the Criterion Channel would have been able to get the rights to it, most assuredly this would have been perfect for the Surreal Nature Films collection they had earlier in 2024.

As is, this Oscar-winning documentary (! More on that at the end) is difficult to track down in HD quality. There is more than one 360p print on YouTube but that looks especially bad for something filled w/ nature footage. Olive Films released it on disc so good luck purchasing it now as physical media without paying a king’s ransom for it. For the record, I DID track down an HD stream-not in the usual spot that obscurities were found. If you know which exact terms to use for a Google search…

Most of the film is impressive-especially for the time-macrophotography which brought the world of insects to life. Various aspects are shown: species vs. species, procreation, the life cycle in a colony of bees, humans attempting to kill locusts to stave off their devouring of resources, etc. It is presented in a rather curious of-its-time fashion: That Guy actor Lawrence Pressman portrays fictional scientist Nils Hellstrom, an eccentric who believes that insects will outlive all humanity & explains why. A bizarre way to frame that footage, undoubtedly. It was believe it or not marketed as a sci-fi thriller upon release but allegedly, not too many carped about the misleading advertisement.

Besides the footage, the sensationalistic narration & commentary from Hellstrom is quite amusing as it seriously paints a picture that insects are fed up with man polluting the world (not to mention attempting to kill mosquitos that spread diseases like malaria) so one day they’ll eradicate us all. It does have horror elements sprinkled in and it is most pronounced in the finale that portrays a colony of ants as an unstoppable killer. Perhaps not a surprise that writer David Seltzer later went on to write The Omen and the killer bear Prophecy. A major asset was the rather groovy score which at times was fusion jazz and was always pretty sweet. Imagine my surprise during the end credits discovering it was from… Lalo Schifrin. I suppose that’s why it was so good.

The film is odd yet rather entertaining, even if perversely so at times. Whether or not it should have won an Oscar for Best Documentary can be debated… that is not even including the small detail that it somehow beat the excellent Nazis in France during WWII documentary The Sorrow and the Pity. I’ve seen both, and it is rather absurd Sorrow did not win. Even back then the Oscars could make some terrible decisions.

 

Too Late for Tears

Too Late for Tears (1949)

Runtime: 100 minutes

Directed by: Byron Haskin

Starring: Lizabeth Scott, Don DeFore, Dan Duryea, Arthur Kennedy, Kristine Miller

From: United Artists

I finally fulfilled a request made several months ago. A mutual on Letterboxd asked me in a comment if I had seen this film; my response was that I hadn’t but promised that eventually it would be viewed. Despite its constant presence on YouTube, it took until last night for me to finally pull the trigger.

Lizabeth Scott and her beau Arthur Kennedy are driving in a convertible when because of circumstances, $60,000 that was meant for nefarious means literally falls into their backseat. Kennedy is the milquetoast type who wants to turn over what would be almost $800,000 in 2024 to the police but Scott is full of avarice so she wants the money kept. As it belonged to Dan Duryea, that really complicates things.

The cast is fine and all and while I was amused by the ruthless Duryea wearing a bow tie-although the most frightening aspect of him was his pronunciation of the word "tedious"-Scott as the steely cool, ruthless Janet was the highlight. She still had her vulnerable moments but you’d be surprised at how she tried her hardest to gain or regain control despite the obstacles in front of her, despite the twists & turns the plot took.

Too Late for Tears is a dark noir which is not oppressively so. Scott as the main cog of the machine does make it distinctive and it is yet another genre effort which is worthy of tracking down. A swell recommendation, in other words.