Runtime: 97 minutes
Directed by: Michael Preece
Starring: Franco Columbu, Ken Kercheval, Elizabeth Kaitan, Van Quattro, Tammara Souza
From: Franco Columbu Productions Inc.
What an interesting story I have about this movie. I saw it because of someone on Letterboxd telling me to see it. Don't worry, it was a fun list that they're doing and participation is of course voluntary. I explain it below:
If you want to know how I came across this obscure film when I did not even know of its existence until Friday night, site member Nathaxnne Walker recently created a list where anyone can give a number in a set of numbers and looking at one of those psychotronic video guides. I decided to participate, and what I got was this movie. Thankfully, it wasn't too difficult to track down, although yes I had to search for it using a trick of the trade and it wasn't an entirely 100% legal way of seeing it.
Star/co-writer/producer Franco Columbu is best known for being a bodybuilder who was in Pumping Iron and has been friends with Schwarzenegger for decades now. Movie-wise he is best known for being Future Terminator in The Terminator, which was a small role but at least it was memorable. The film has an opening crawl explaining that Franco wanted to make this movie because the problem of drugs recently reached his island home of Sardinia and he wanted to spotlight this. As noble of an intention as that is, the movie is pretty bad. It has unintentionally hilarious moments but isn't as ineptly amazing as Samurai Cop... I guess an average rating is appropriate.
The plot has Columbu (a former member of INTERPOL!) team up with a young female cop to take down a druglord who happens to live in Sardinia. The movies rushes to get you there... such things as “pacing” and “logic” and “plot progression” are things that this film can't quite master. At least it was interesting seeing that island and some of its customs. But yes you shouldn't go out of your way to see this unless you are a giant fan of terrible 90's action films. It's poorly made yet if you really want to watch this, you can laugh at such things as the early 90's wardrobe/soundtrack or how Columbu is only 5 foot 5 (i.e. 1.68 meters) and the movie does not try to disguise this fact via clever camera angles or other visual tricks. In addition, there are some people in the cast who you may recognize if you are a giant film fan. If you know Ken Kercheval, Robin from Friday the 13th Part 7: The New Blood (she's the lady cop, believe it or not), Gibbons the Cyberdyne security guard from T2, or a main player from the 5th Silent Night, Deadly Night (yes, the bizarre one which is some sort of parable about Pinocchio), you are probably a big movie nerd.
There is action, whether it's shootouts, fistfights, and what have you... none of it is done spectacularly, to say the very least. There is some nudity for those that enjoy such things... but there's sites like Pornhub so that isn't a big deal anymore.
What was the highlight for me was out literally out of nowhere, there's a scene where Franco appears shirtless with some wine, and he tries to romance his woman cop partner! He's quite a bit older than her to boot, so it's pretty comical. Him then making sexually suggestive remarks when they work out at a gym... not a progressive view on women he has. But as this is an old action picture, of course Franco ends up banging lady cop. Another highlight was the opening scene, where out of nowhere Arnold shows up. It's only a cameo that lasts for a few minutes and it's on YouTube. They work out and Arnold says that Franco's wine is made by him stomping on grapes.
In the future I'll try to watch at least once in a blue moon those random early 90's no-budget action films. I imagine I could one day stumble upon something as astounding as Samurai Cop that no one knows about because it's never gotten any notable publicity.
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