The Princess Bride

Yeah, I'm still in shock over the news that broke last night. What a family tragedy all around.

RIP Rob Reiner and his wife Michele Singer Reiner

What a crummy weekend between TWO mass shootings and the circumstances of how Rob & his wife were murdered. Having just watched the Spinal Tap sequel on Friday in Kansas before flying back to Florida (it was selected because the movie was new to HBO Max, wasn’t long, and there was interest in a theatrical viewing before the middling reviews rolled in), I wish the film would have been better-liked by me. That said, that doesn’t diminish the tremendous start to his directing career but I’ll discuss that at the conclusion of the review.

More than one of his films was seen by me as a kid and never again as an adult; that includes The Princess Bride. As tackling North for the first time in 30 years doesn’t seem a fitting tribute (even as a naïve young teen, that movie sadly was a flop), instead I’ll finally discuss a flick so beloved, more than one moment/line has become ingrained in Western pop culture to this day. 

Sorry for the obvious comment, but it actually is inconceivable that I waited so many years to finally view The Princess Bride again. A detailed plot description is not necessary; Peter Falk reads his grandson Fred Savage The Princess Bride (the book) when the latter is sick in bed. Those two offer occasional interjections into the playful sendup of an adventure fairy tale involving Princess Buttercup, a Farm Boy, and a man with a Zorro-esque mask. The movie is still a lot of fun.

What a cast. The heroes are likable while the heels are amusing in their own ways. What a trio Wallace Shawn, Mandy Patinkin, and Andre the Giant were. Of course, as a pro wrestling fan it’s always nice seeing the man born Andre Roussimoff. In the 70’s he was quite mobile for his huge size-unfortunately, by this point and his legendary match with Hulk Hogan in the Pontiac Silverdome for WrestleMania III, his body broke down and was rather immobile. Thankfully, movie magic made this not obvious.

I do know the lore of how Reiner’s dad Carl gave him this book, inspiring Rob to adapt the novel when Truffaut, Redford, and Jewison weren’t able to. Thanks to Norman Lear and the support of then-head of 20th Century Fox Barry Diller, the film was made and while not a box office smash, became beloved in later years. The film looked great (not to constantly belabor this point, but especially compared to most modern pictures) and offered scenic views of the English/Irish countryside, along with quality sets. The Mark Knopler score was fitting for the setting; Dire Straits made some great songs, including Money for Nothing… regrettable usage of a homophobic slur aside.

I can’t speak for the tastes of the current generation but the hope is that The Princess Bride is timeless, a tale that can captivate both adults & children even as 2025 concludes. This long-overdue rewatch did brighten my spirit and made me feel better about what appears to be a family tragedy. Without a doubt, in the years away I’ll visit and revisit more of Rob Reiner’s work.

Portrait in Crystal

Portrait in Crystal (Shui Jing Ren) (1983)

Runtime: 84 delirious minutes

Directed by: Hua Shan

Starring: Jason Pai Piao, Lau Yuk-Pok, Wang Yong, Chen Szu-Chia, Teng Wei-Hao

From: Shaw Brothers

This sure was a bizarre early 80’s Shaw Brothers film. I mean, not all the entries in that category have been viewed by me, but I’m referring to the likes of The Boxer’s Omen & Buddha’s Palm here. If you thought those films featured inscrutable plots hard to follow, wait until you see Portrait in Crystal!

Ostensibly, the story concerns a pair of dudes who create crystal statues--the leader of the two decides to bleed on the statue to “give it more life”… even though his chubby pal correctly noted the lore that this would make the statue come to life. As the statue was of a woman, we see a female in a cool outfit kill a bunch of dudes, but there are reasons why this occurs. That isn’t told in a clear fashion, nor are the misadventures that the duo engage in. No one-at least on Letterboxd-seems to have a firm grasp of the plot, as a matter of fact. 

While not as bonkers entertaining as The Boxer’s Omen, the film still has great sets, looks better than most modern movies, has an interesting score (whether or not it uses uncredited music from elsewhere is unknown), fun action, moves as a nice clip and is never boring. This has everything from laser animations-always popular in this region of the world during the time period-to a torture sequence straight out of a pinku movie, to borrow a phrase. Also, a dude wears a featureless white face mask, for reasons that become obvious in the final act.

This Hua Shan joint is a lot of fun; he is best known for the wildly entertaining Super Inframan but from multiple Letterboxd mutuals, he also directed some other wacky films, especially Bloody Parrot-like this film, a recent addition to Arrow’s streaming service. More than one stated in their reviews for Crystal that Parrot was a superior film/experience-one day I’ll find out.

Spinal Tap II: The End Continues

Spinal Tap II: The End Continues (2025)

66% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 134 reviews) 

Runtime: 84 minutes

Directed by: Rob Reiner

Starring: The gang from the first film, plus many others, including mostly pointless cameos

From: Bleecker Street

I’d rather discuss other things rather than this movie. Now I’ll mention that I made it back home to Florida fine-albeit, a long flight delay meant that stepping foot at home didn’t occur until after 3AM! It was still better than my flight back last December; I suffered the worst case of food poisoning in my life and it wasn’t a pretty sight-no, I didn’t have the grilled halibut. I’ll mention some details concerning the trip to Kansas at the end of the review, for anyone that cares. Now, it’s the time to mention that while Spinal Tap the band hasn’t been seen by me elsewhere aside from the 1984 original movie, that original movie is great-a droll mockumentary so authentic to the irrationality of a successful rock band, several acts before and after 1984 thought the movie was about them. A sequel would have been created much sooner, if not for rights issues that took three full decades (!) to resolve.

That’s why I’m especially disappointed that the film mostly missed the mark for me. The idea of a band reuniting for one last concert is a fine one, & rock and roll bands have had feuding members for the better part of the last 70 years. As stated often by me, comedy is the most subjective of genres-while II contained some chuckles, the majority of the humor just did not entertain me. Some of the potential even felt squandered. What sank the movie for me was the music producer character who based on his name was a spoof of Simon Cowell. This film’s Simon was a dumb and not funny caricature of a music producer; I loathed that character.

Furthermore, the references to such modern-day aspects as cryptocurrency and K-Pop felt like senior citizens addressing those topics—that means “not cool.” This is a modern movie trope I haven’t mentioned yet, but only due to my avoidance of such films: a conflict, whether it’s built up throughout or suddenly begins, is resolved quickly and felt superfluous. Sadly, that occurred here. AND, the onslaught of cameos from famous musicians mostly felt pointless.

To reiterate, some chuckles were present and the catchy tunes (whether old or new) were nice. As a whole, though, The End Continues sadly does not go to 11-apologies for the low-hanging fruit of a joke that might may be look like a hack. In fact, I’d rather smell the glove than ever watch this again, while the OG effort will forever be rewatchable.

As for the annual sojourn to Kansas, as always it was nice to see my sister & her family, even if all three of my nephews are a handful. The ability to drive a car out there this time meant that a few interesting locations were visited along the way, not just in Kansas. Getting to see a cleaning robot (w/ cute face) at a Quik Trip gas station was neat, and stumbling across a Golden Chick restaurant was unexpected-it is a small chain based in Texas which has an outpost in Wichita. Visiting a Jack in a Box and Whataburger was rare… even if the former is opening an outpost in Orlando and the latter might return to Central Florida.

However, a Holy Grail place was visited in Dallas: In-N-Out! Somehow, one had never been visited before in my almost 45 years on this planet. After the hope for years that one would be had: the fries were good (as long as they aren’t cold) and the pink lemonade was good… but the burger was quite tasty. That does help demonstrate why the chain is so beloved, even if I still do get why some find the onslaught of praise through the decades at least a bit overwrought. All the fun and travel the past 3 weeks aside, I’m happy for a return to normalcy for at least the rest of 2025.

The Man with the Golden Arm

The Man with the Golden Arm (1955)

Runtime: 119 minutes

Directed by: Otto Preminger

Starring: Frank Sinatra, Eleanor Parker, Kim Novak, Arnold Stang, Darren McGavin

From: United Artists

I saw Man on Turner Classic Movies this morning; they had a marathon of Sinatra movies due to today being his birthday. It's a famous anti-drug screed from the past that had never been seen before now. While of course it being a product of 1950's Hollywood this is far less explicit than something like Christiane F or Trainspotting, the message is still effective.

Ol' Blue Eyes portrayed the somewhat improbably-named FRANKIE MACHINE, a heroin addict who takes the rap for a rat fink and becomes clean while serving his time in prison. Technically, “heroin” is never said and in the novel this is based on, the drug was morphine, but the context clues suggest H. He tries to stay clean and become a jazz drummer; however, he still has his old friends and some of them are also rat finks. He also has a wife in a wheelchair (Eleanor Parker), although Kim Novak-a flame from the past-seems to be a better partner for him, not because of his wife requiring a wheelchair.

As others have proclaimed, Darren McGavin as the guy who forced H on an addict attempting to recover for good might as well have twirled his mustache if he could. The movie was still controversial for its time in its frank depiction of drug addiction-including attempting to go cold turkey-and demonized the drug rather than the individuals hooked to the poison. The cast was swell... Frank Sinatra as the lead, McGavin, Parker, Novak, and while I finally noticed that Arnold Stang resembled a tortoise w/ glasses, he did a fine job as Frankie's annoying/energetic lackey. 

Buttressed by solid direction from Otto Preminger and a great score from Elmer Bernstein, The Man with the Golden Arm is well worthy of your time if the premise/individuals involved pique your interest whatsoever. It also has a sweet opening credits sequence from the legendary Saul Bass.

 

Fast Times at Ridgemont High

Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)

Runtime: 89 minutes

Directed by: Amy Heckerling

Starring: A great, deep cast

From: Universal

I'd love floor seats to Van Halen for $12.50.

This was a film viewed by me many years ago; slice of life pictures aren't always my bag and despite some memorable moments (especially “that one scene”) I was lukewarm at best with the movie. However, now my movie tastes have changed and Fast Times is now better appreciated by me.

Based on Cameron Crowe's book of the same name where he went undercover as a high school kid (!) the film shows the lives of a gaggle of students at the titular high school, from freshmen through seniors. They're teenagers, so naturally the focus is on sex and relationships, although such topics as “cool cars”, jobs, and difficult teachers are also addressed. A key aspect is that the characters felt real & relatable. A few people are painted as jerks but all (even Ray Walston's amusingly grumpy Mr. Hand) are shown to have their good qualities also. Judge Reinhold's Brad acts more confident than he should for someone that crashes out at customers at his fast food job, but he is nice towards his sister Jennifer Jason Leigh and won't tell their parents about her rather serious elective medical procedure.

I went to high school in Illinois instead of So Cal but how messy and chaotic those teen years/school could be felt real. People fought over a woman, a near-brawl happens during school hours, a dude is too shy/nervous to ask a woman out so she thinks he doesn't like her, a stoner is happy to flaunt his truancy, and yes, what I'll call “self-gratification!” Teen sex was addressed honestly, including the consequences. I was a fool for not fully appreciating the movie, its authenticity, the mix of laughs and drama, the cast full of famous faces, including more than a few who would become quite famous in later years. It is amazing that nerdy Mark Ratner was based on someone who later wrote some computer books in the For Dummies series-Andy Rathbone.

The So Cal setting was charming, as was all the period fashion and the joke that several high school girls modeled their appearance after Pat Benatar. Related, the soundtrack was great; I enjoyed most of the tunes that were from a wide variety of artists, including several people that were in the Eagles. That created a good mood for me, even during the film's most sobering scenes. As said too often by me, this rewatch was long overdue, especially considering my opinion is now more in line with the general consensus. Director Amy Heckerling also deserves her props for the swell job she did. As astounding as this will sound, somewhere in the multiverse, DAVID LYNCH would have been the director; honest.

We Got the Beat from The Go Go's was a great opening credits song, but at the risk of sounding like a Gross Man, “that one scene” of Phoebe Cates in her red bikini—the scene and the usage of Moving in Stereo from The Cars will forever be legendary. I want to stress that she did well in her role-I'm not being all heart eyes about her because she was (& still is) an attractive woman.

Final Destination

Final Destination (2000)

Runtime: 98 minutes

Directed by: James Wong

Starring: Devon Sawa, Ali Larter, Kerr Smith, Kristen Cloke, Seann William Scott

From: New Line Cinema

I don't even need to ask... people will be appalled that I had never seen ANY Final Destination movie until today. I knew of several deaths throughout the franchise due to cultural osmosis (chiefly, the one involving the logging truck) but I've never been interested. Perhaps it was visiting the liberal video store in college one evening, where they were playing the installment that had the opening where some woman stopped her car on an entrance ramp and backed up many cars behind her... that was so dumb it turned me off of all those films. However, it was over 20 years ago so seeing this on my sister's HBO Max account gave me the inspiration to say that I at least gave one of these a chance.

The opening act, I wasn't expecting to hear such topics as “use the bathroom before going on a flight to Paris... you don't want a 'hot chick' to smell your stinky poo if they use the airplane lavatory right after you!”, see Seann William Scott wear the classic New York Rangers alternate jersey (the one with the Statue of Liberty's face on the front) or spot a poster of the John Waters movie Pecker hanging in Devon Sawa's room at the beginning. 

Of course, I knew the premise that Sawa had a premonition-correct, in this case-that his airplane bound for Paris would blow him... due to circumstances, including that of the aggro male type, several others get off the plane with him and Death fixes that mistake via preposterous kills. Yes, after viewing, I read up on some of the lore... how the original idea was proposed for an X-Files episode, the “180” references are due to the film's original title, and the perhaps questionable decision to base part of the plane's explosion on the real-life 1996 TWA Flight 800 explosion, including the usage of stock footage from that used as news footage in a scene. The decision to use John Denver's music when he died in a plane crash... that can also be debated.

Final Destination the movie is quite silly; that aggro male behavior, the decision to name your daughter CLEAR RIVERS (although yes, I understand the concept of “hippie parents”), those elaborate deaths, the realization that the scene in the airport lavatory was actually foreshadowing a kill. That said, Destination did address survivors' guilt, Sawa's obsession over the incident, and the impact of that tragedy. The premise is of course a great one; even the writers have admitted they were “inspired” by the moody 1984 horror movie Soul Survivor, which is one I recommend.

Ultimately, I was entertained by Final Destination, including how “2000” it was. Of course, I knew that Tony Todd was a familiar face in the franchise; it was bittersweet that Bloodlines allowed him to have a quality send-off both for his mortician character and of Todd himself. His one scene part was a macabre delight. Don't expect me to check out the sequels-that doesn't mean that the second installment will never be checked out far in the future-but I was amused... including Sawa referring to Death as “you f***” during a crazed rant. 

After all, using the names of people involved in horror movies from many decades ago for character names here was a charming touch.

Larceny, Inc.

Larceny Inc. (1942) 

Runtime: 95 minutes

Directed by: Lloyd Bacon

Starring: Edward G. Robinson, Broderick Crawford, Edward Brophy, Jack Carson, Jane Wyman

From: Warner Bros.

It's time for me to catch up on movies I've seen while in Kansas. So far, it's been two, although I hope to view then review one sometime Thursday proper.

As I am now in Wichita-and will be until I fly back to Florida on Friday-I have the opportunity to see more than one movie and participate on this platform again. The drive here was as exhausting as in August of last year, including the traffic and all the hours on the road. I'll give more details in a later review but I visited some locations that can't be experienced in Florida.

Larceny played on Turner Classic Movies this morning. As the movie was a comedic version of a heist movie and featured quite a few recognizable faces, I was happy to see an old-timey picture. Turns out, not only is this a Christmas film, Larceny was quite delightful. Robinson plays a hoodlum nicknamed PRESSURE who teams up with his lunkheaded friend JUG and their pal WEEPY to purchase a luggage store once the first two are released from prison... instead of proving that they're reformed and wish to succeed in a legitimate business, a bank is next door and they wish to rob it via drilling in the basement. I've heard that Woody Allen's 2000 movie Small Time Crooks was “heavily inspired” by Larceny.

The absurdity is that despite their best efforts, they were victims of circumstance & the luggage business becomes a success for them. The film-by my tastes-is hysterical, the humor still landing after over 80 years. Not a surprise that Woody would want to remake it, credited or otherwise. Robinson of course nailed his smooth-talking debonair part. Broderick Crawford was a delight as the dim-witted Jug and I was quite amused by Edward Brophy as Weepy. There's also Jane Wyman as Pressure's moll, Anthony Quinn as a foil, Jack Carson, Harry Davenport, George Meeker, and several faces I won't reveal here who would become famous (or in one case, much more famous) in later decades. This Warner Brothers production offered many of their stock players. To my delight, Fred Kelsey had a small part-I best know him for appearing in a few Three Stooges shorts.

I was happy to have finally seen this underrated early 40's comedy from Lloyd Bacon where Robinson was swell at spoofing his tough guy persona; this includes dressing up as Santa Claus at one point. It's unknown how many more reviews will be done in the upcoming week--to reiterate, I'm doing fine in Kansas at the moment.

Chimpanzee

Before I post my review for the 2012 DisneyNature documentary Chimpanzee, an announcement: Now's the time for me to announce that until Saturday, December 13th, I won't be on Letterboxd as frequently. It's vacation time; I'll explain later why I'll be even more preoccupied with other things than the previous times I was on vacation. I still hope to post some reviews, but they won't be daily by any means-the next one won't be for a few days.

The review for Chimpanzee: 
 

Now felt like the time to see another DisneyNature documentary. A few have been viewed; as I always say when diving into that world, the more serious, “adult” sort of nature documentaries (such as the ones narrated by Sir David Attenborough) are more my speed. That said, what DisneyNature does is still good and full of great footage of animals & the worlds they inhabit. The narration from celebrities can be too goofy at times and/or cloying-I can comprehend that it’s for an all-ages audience and to list a specific example, I’d be fine with my four nephews & one niece viewing something like Chimpanzee.

Chimpanzee follows a young member of the species named Oscar. The viewer follows his clan as we see the stunning jungle habitat they reside in (the Tai National Forest in Ivory Coast), feuds w/ other clans, some peril, etc. Along the way, educational facts are presented. As I’ve stated in other reviews, the assumption is that more than one chimpanzee was used as “Oscar.” Other nature documentaries do craft narratives, after all. It is wacky that they decided to have a villain named… SCAR.

Celebrities always provide the narration; in this case, it was… Tim Allen. I know, a controversial figure now but he was fine as a narrator. At one point, he does impersonate Tim “The Toolman” Taylor; perhaps those in power wanted him to do that to placate audiences. My carping, re: certain details of these documentaries don’t mean that I don’t like them as infrequent viewing or that they don’t have anything to educate/entertain me, let alone Joe Q. and Jane Public. While not theatrical releases anymore, DisneyNature still makes these documentaries. It won’t be a future project to view all of them—but that doesn’t mean rare viewings won’t occur.

Carry On Jack

Carry on Jack (1964)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Gerald Thomas

Starring: Bernard Cribbins, Juliet Mills, Kenneth Williams, Charles Hawtry, Donald Houston

From:Anglo-Amalagated Film Distributors

It’s actually been years since I’d seen a Carry On movie from the 60’s. Yeah, those aren’t watched that often anymore and many from the 60’s were already witnessed by me. The same, I was happy to see one of the films that I have on DVD as part of a set purchased long ago; furthermore, I’m sure the Dr. Who fans will like that this starred Bernard Cribbins as the lead. Who knows what you guys will think of his name: ALBERT POOP-DECKER.

Yes, this had the randy and bawdy humor you’d expect from the franchise, albeit less frequently than typical. The setting is naval in general and specifically, the time of Horatio Nelson-the opening shows him passing away, establishing the year as 1805. It involves the War of the Third Coalition-the particulars aren’t important but it was Britain and several other countries versus France/Spain and several areas that would later become a part of Germany. Poop-Decker is inept but is forced to become part of the crew of the ship Venus. Juliet Mills cosplays as a guy to find a long-lost love.

An important detail: of course, the setting and plot wouldn’t easily allow for the inclusion of the distaff regulars to the franchise: Hattie Jacques, Joan Sims, etc. However, Jim Dale only appears for a few minutes and only two other regulars appear-at least they were Kenneth Williams and Charles Hawtrey, portraying exactly the sort of archetypes you’d expect. Be that as it may, two familiar character actors make their only appearance in this universe: Donald Houston and Cecil Parker.

While atypical, the film was still silly and still entertained me. Nice ship sets was an asset, as was the inclusion of pirates in the final act. It won’t be all those months later that I finally see another Carry On picture-however, what I’ll select for next time should be more the archetypical movie you’d expect.

Something Wicked This Way Comes

Something Wicked This Way Comes (1983)

Runtime: 95 minutes

Directed by: Jack Clayton

Starring: Jason Robards, Jonathan Pryce, Diane Ladd (RIP), Royal Dano, Vidal Peterson, Shawn Carson

From: Disney

A belated RIP to Diane Ladd. In the upcoming month or two, there’s more than one person who’s passed away this year that I need to tip my cap to. As I’m subscribed to Disney+ for December, I’ve only seen some of Ladd’s movies-this was a small yet important role-and until its addition to the platform two months ago, this movie was infamously hard to track down.

I’m fascinated by this era of Disney where they weren’t quite sure what they were doing in the world of cinema and they didn’t have subsidiary companies like Touchstone or Hollywood Pictures to release pictures not meant for a family audience, that’s how we had oddball films (like this, Return to Oz and The Watcher in the Woods, which I hope Disney+ adds one day) that tried to be of a darker tone from the Disney label.

In this tale where a Mr. Dark brings an ominous carnival to a bucolic small Illinois town during an October at least 100 years ago, the talent involved was impressive. An adaptation of a Ray Bradbury novel, the stars included Ladd, Jason Robards (as a really old father; the movie stresses that point), Royal Dano, Pam Grier in a supporting role, and Jonathan Pryce as Mr. Dark. This was in gestation for years-Bryna Productions was the production company, meaning Kirk Douglas was involved. James Horner provided a proper whimsical score-it wasn’t the original soundtrack, but more on that later-and the rural setting was pleasant.

Regrettably, I only liked rather than loved the film-perhaps if there had been childhood viewings, a different tune would be whistled. Like with Watcher, this had production issues, reshoots, an unhappy Disney, and other drama which undoubtedly did harm to the potential this had. The idea that this carnival grants the told & untold desires of the town’s residents (only of course it’s of the Faustian bargain variety) is a swell one, and I’m sure the book is better. The presumption is that the overblown special effects finale were part of the reshoots. Be that as it may, it was still a movie I liked. The town’s setting is pleasant, as was the carnival-aside from the whole evil aspect thing.

The cinematography was quality; that was due to future De Palma chief cinematographer Stephen H. Burum. Pryce did a nice job; somewhere in the multiverse are versions where either Peter O’Toole or Christopher Lee would have been Mr. Dark. Disney wanted to save money, you see, so they cast a talented actor, but one who was almost always in the world of theater at the time. The film’s from the perspective of two young boys; the actors and the characters were both fine, not intolerable to follow.

A shame that there were those issues, those reshoots, the replacing of the original Georges Delerue score (from a short listen on YouTube, it is more ominous) and other problems. There are still nice practical effects and a few effective scares as well. Plenty do love the movie more than moi-for their sakes, I’m glad the film is on Disney+. The Blu release was a limited exclusive deal back in ’21 as part of a now-defunct program—the prices on eBay are as expensive as you would expect. There are rumors of an upcoming remake; now this is the sort of movie that does need one… if they don’t screw it up with various tropes and movements I’m not a fan of in modern cinema.

Breaking News

Breaking News (Dai Si Gin) (2004)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Johnnie To

Starring: Richie Jen, Kelly Chen, Nick Cheung, Yong You, Shiu-Hung Hui

From: Several different Hong Kong companies 

Breaking news: I was happy to see this Johnnie To movie. I’ve only scratched the surface of his filmography, despite seeing 2013’s Drug War soon after release and finding it to be great. This will leave the Criterion Channel after today, forcing a watch now. 

I knew we were in good hands in the opening minutes. A police stakeout goes horribly awry. There’s a LONG tracking shot lasting a few minutes-panning along and moving up/down via a crane, capturing both the cops and criminals. The shootout continues after that-law enforcement looked particularly bad as media happened to be nearby, filming and photographing the bungled operation, including a cop holding his hands up in fear to a criminal pointing a gun at him.

How do they handle this embarrassment? Better training, a reprimand for the mistakes made, improved planning? Of course not! Instead, they manipulate the power of the press via engaging in a PR campaign. Let’s be glad such things couldn’t happen now anywhere in the world… both sides are followed.

I dare not reveal much more of the plot-the satire, the quality action scenes well-filmed, the humanizing moments. The score from Ben Cheung Siu-Hung and Chung Chi-Wing was uniquely effective… percussion, flamenco guitar, what sounded like bagpipes, and other interesting sounds. Yeah, a decent amount of the film is in a blue hue that is indicative of the early 2000’s-even then, that amused me. I missed out on not giving Breaking News a shot much sooner.

 

The Long Goodbye

The Long Goodbye (1973)

Runtime: 112 minutes

Directed by: Robert Altman

Starring: Elliott Gould, Nina van Pallandt, Sterling Hayden, Mark Rydell, Henry Gibson

From: United Artists

What better way to announce my safe return home to Central Florida after spending a few days in Fort Myers than viewing one of Robert Altman’s most famous movies before it leaves the Criterion Channel after Sunday? Considering the noir and neo-noir I’ve viewed in my life, it seems like a misstep on my part that I’ve never tackled this until earlier in the day. Of course, I’ve viewed some other Philip Marlowe pictures before, but never one set in the 70’s.

Right away, I laughed that the movie opens w/ Marlowe’s forced journey to a 24-hour store to purchase cat food for his constantly-meowing feline. It reminded me of a previous journey to Kansas (this one with my father and late mother) when she helped out sis and fed one of the two cats she had at the time. It wasn’t 3 AM but feeding time was late; the kitty constantly meowed as mom prepared the food, much to my mom’s consternation! No, mom did not smoke constantly like Marlowe did here, nor did she act laconic like Elliott Gould’s portrayal of a man who deliberately felt out of lockstep with his surroundings… a 40’s or 50’s detective who lives right by a bunch of attractive young women who do yoga and love being topless.

Our private eye associates w/ a cad named Terry Lennox; much to his misfortune, Lennox is missing & accused of murdering his wife. The film had some interesting casting; Lennox was played by Jim Bouton… yes, the former baseball player who caused controversy by writing a 1969 book called Ball Four, where people at the time were shocked that pro sports players were human and thus did drugs, drank, and were womanizers. What innocent times back then. Anyhow…

It’s not my favorite movie involving the character nor my personal favorite from Altman-that said, The Long Goodbye was still a very good time. In fact, you might say that it was OK with me… the film was a satirical look at the life of a private eye involved in a convoluted case with various shady characters, some of them real reprobates. Marlowe was a jerk, albeit a funny jerk. It was a nice cast with several other recognizable faces… yes I did know that Arnold Schwarzenegger appeared in a scene as a hood, but not that an actor famous at the time had an uncredited part. I wasn’t familiar with Nina van Pallandt but that Danish actress did a swell job.

The biggest assets the film had came from a trio of legends: Gould’s performance as the lead, the jazzy score from John Williams, and the cinematography from Vilmos Zsigmond. The film was downbeat, although given the decade and its neo-noir style, this should not have been a surprise. I’m personally happy that in 2025, several famous 70’s pictures were finally partaken in by me.

Time for Me to Catch Up

I'll be making three posts in total tonight. The first is for the 1920 Buster Keaton short Convict 13, posted on Letterboxd this past Friday night: 

While I have been having fun on my Thanksgiving break, I am still glad to have some time to talk about a silent short. I'll be returning home and in about 24 hours, I hope to have a review of something else, short or feature-length. 

I felt like Buster Keaton, as it's been awhile. Keaton starts off unsuccessfully playing golf for the purposes of wooing Sybil Seely-a lady I've mentioned before as the 1920's version of Milana Vayntrub. The titular Convict 13 is a prisoner who escapes and runs into a knocked-out Buster. Unsurprisingly, the prisoner exchanges clothes with Keaton, and of course Keaton literally runs into prison. While behind bars, his main foe is the prison's main foe... a large human portrayed by Joe Roberts.

This was not top-tier Buster; that's not a slight as Keaton still had his creative moments and funny pratfalls. Black comedy is also present-they attempt to hang our hero but the rope is like a bungee chord. There's also an old gag that is used at the conclusion of the short which evidently was used by Buster during his vaudeville days, at least according to a mutual's review. The final 10 or so seconds could have been a groaner even back in 1920-it sure is in 2025... even then, there's more carnage and people being knocked out cold than you'd expect, so I can't carp about Convict 13 too hard.

Marco

Marco (2024)

Runtime: 145 minutes

Directed by: Haneef Adeni

Starring: Unni Mukundan, Siddique, Jagadish, Abhimanyu Shammy Thilakan, Kabir Duhan Singh

From: A few different Indian companies

This went a step too far.

As always, during the week of (American) Thanksgiving, I am like many in the United States in that my movie-watching won’t be as frequent due to the aspect of traveling to other cities to hang out w/ loved ones. Not only do I expect to post at odd times, it won’t be every day and I won’t be able to like as many reviews as usual.

As for Marco… it’s an Indian movie I was finally able to track down. Months ago, someone on a messageboard informed everyone that Marco was even more violent than another Indian release from last year, Kill. Kill I have seen—and that was bloody gruesome. My interest was piqued, yet it was just now the reason why I couldn’t find it streaming anywhere in America w/ English subtitles: it’s an exclusive title for SonyLIV. Thankfully, YouTube has that as a service you can subscribe to… I am doing a free one-week trial, you see.

Concerning the film: the titular Marco is part of a crime family, even though he was adopted in rather than it being by blood. Some A-holes kill the blind Victor (via a dip in acid!), who is the sibling he was the closest to. It might as well be a bromance. Despite this being my first motion picture in the Malayalam language, it has the same characteristics that I’ve viewed in the pictures in the tongues of Tamil, Telugu, or Hindi.

Marco doesn’t appear right away-the plot is established then he receives quite the introduction… children argue over his character then we see him escape kidnapping via the killing of dogs (regrettable, even if Marco explains that he had to and he’s a dog lover) and like the sort of movies from India I end up seeking out, it’s macho OOT moments-typically in slow-motion-as he wrecks multiple dudes… most of the time while smoking a cigarette! He smokes more often than a Chow Yun-Fat character! It’s funny: like the YouTube copy I saw of the 2019 Tamil film Kaithi, there are messages that tobacco and alcohol are bad each time they are seen on screen-believe me, that is seen constantly in Marco the movie.

The first hour has some action but it’s only after this point that most of the grisly moments occur. A memorable scene involves… a chainsaw. Dog dying isn’t the only questionable moment; there seemed to be an implication that a key character was being punished right after they admitted their bisexuality. Be that as it may, I was still entertained by this trash (at least up to a certain point) which did attempt to create a story before the worst of the carnage occurred.

The obvious digital moments weren’t always beloved by me—even then, limbs are broken like prime Seagal, limbs are chopped off, there is more than one trap that Jigsaw probably had in his mind… I was digging that, then they not only blatantly stole a line from Heath Ledger’s Joker, they went the direction of those extreme French horror movies from the early 2000’s-or a few Korean movies of the same era-none of which I liked because in part they were just too gross, too much.

To give a hint as the direction this goes, another message popped up: “Violence against women and children is punishable by law.” Kill was a lot of fun, definitely graphic but they didn’t go overboard in attempting to shock or nauseate the audience. One scene here just turned me off. It’s a shame, as the film at least attempted some stylish moments ripped off from other sources… there’s a short POV fight segment, a simulated long one-take fight, a scene in black and white until the red of blood appears.

Of course, “too much” possibly or probably won’t be the case for you; YMMV. Additionally, checking out Indian movies that aren’t the same archetype (such as, checking out pictures from the past) may be beneficial for me. As derivative as Marco could be, I was happy to finally cross this off the list… not to mention, it wasn’t a movie I thought was bad.

Gorgo

Gorgo (1961)

Runtime: 78 minutes

Directed by: Eugene Lourie

Starring: Bill Travers, William Sylvester, Vincent Winter, Christopher Rhodes, Joseph O’Conor

From: King Brothers Productions

What memorable wanton destruction in the final act; that was my main feeling concerning Gorgo after viewing the restored version on Arrow’s streaming site. The only foreknowledge I had beforehand was that this was Britain’s attempt at a kaiju movie. I was invested in the story so the methodical pacing for the first two acts was not an issue—the effects (at least when they attempted to superimpose images to reflect destruction) haven’t aged well-at least the model work and the guy in a suit stomping over miniature sets still are old-school cool.

The plot isn’t too terribly original: a ship wrecks off the coast of Ireland due to volcanic activity that also released a prehistoric creature, bipedal in nature and looking like a lizard of sorts. It’s captured and because the pair that run the ship are greedy A-holes (one of them Heywood Floyd from 2001, i.e. William Sylvester), they swerve two Irish academics and instead sell the titular Gorgo to a London circus as a sideshow act. Regrettably for them, that creature is just a baby—his mother is on the warpath looking for her offspring.

I can nitpick over how despite the presence of several voices of reason (including a little orphan boy, who lives in an Irish village but stows away on the ship and suddenly is unofficially adopted by our two male leads) and opportunities to prevent the destruction of London, it happens due to sheer stupidity… I am more forgiving of those flaws when the final act delivered on the destruction of London. 

As sociopathic as it may sound, that’s not my intent when describing how some expected landmarks were wrecked, how many innocent deaths occurred, all the carnage, the skies turning orange due to all the fires in the area… those moments were well-realized, awkward superimposed images aside. The radio announcer that often provides OOT commentary to the audience (both fictional and us, the viewers) was tremendous.

The majority that view kaiju movies are predominately interested in seeing the calamity, the annihilation the creature delivers. In this case, Gorgo (the movie and the creature’s mother) was satisfying; the visuals were grand and while cliché in this genre, the message of hubris by humanity and how greed/avarice can have devastating consequences… that was delivered well and henceforth, I was charmed by this movie that wasn’t as campy as I erroneously presumed it would be. 

For clarification’s sake, I’ve never viewed the apparently similar Reptilicus-the draw of seeing Danes attempt to enter the kaiju market strikes me as curious. One day in the future I need to check out that ’62 film. I’ve also never peeped the UK’s other giant monster movies from this era: Konga and The Giant Behemoth. The former starring a young Michael Gough interests due to his presence alone.

Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin

Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin (2021)

Runtime: 99 long minutes

Directed by: William Eubank

Starring: Emily Bader, Roland Buck III, Dan Lippert, Jaye Ayres-Brown, Tom Nowicki

From: Paramount Players/Blumhouse

This isn’t MY Paranormal Activity!

Truth be told, there are lists I’ve created on Letterboxd where I discuss franchises-and those lists will forever be incomplete because it’s been determined by me that viewing those installments would just be infuriate me by (among other things) totally waste my time. As I know I’m the only one who really cares about such things, that’s why it’s not a big deal.

In hindsight, there was no need to see this unrelated sequel which involves no characters from the preceding movies, paranormal or not. A young lady named Margot is followed by a truly unendurable dude named Chris (and a random sound dude whose distinguishing traits are “he’s awkwardly annoying” and “he’s really tall”) who film her finding the family that abandoned her at a hospital as a baby. I don’t categorize this as found footage; many moments break that illusion. Even if it was… this motion picture set at an Amish community-I suppose this community won’t complain too hard if you make a bad movie filled with dumb, irritating characters where their sect is involved w/ demons.

Even if this was called Next of Kin and did not have the Paranormal Activity name attached to it, this movie would be bad. I’m glad it’s not just Next of Kin, if only because there’s two much better films from the 80’s w/ that title… either the slow-burn Aussie thriller from 1982, or the movie from ’89 where Patrick Swayze, Bill Paxton, and Liam Neeson are a trio of hillbilly siblings (!) from Appalachia. There are some moments that aren’t bad and the snowy landscape of rural New York State provides some nice scenery.

Otherwise, this movie was just lame and besides not following the found footage format AND added in unnecessary jump scare noises (no, really), they couldn’t even be arsed to set up a camera to film events at night when everyone’s sleeping. Your feelings on the Paranormal Activity are almost irrelevant, except that you’d likely be even more offended. As is, while I know some out there enjoyed the film, personally I couldn’t recommend it to anyone.

 

Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension Revisited

Paranormal Activity: The Ghost Dimension is a Christmas movie.

Boy, this movie was not as good as the (limited release) theatrical 3D showing from a decade ago. It was a random path I took for me to suddenly realize that the majority who hated the film were likely right & thus a viewing at home in 2D would change my opinion—this was true, and I am someone who enjoyed all of them except the 4th installment.

As explained before, the first Paranormal Activity is one I’ll always have a soft spot for. It was a movie championed on a long-defunct podcast a full two years before it came out. The early screening in Orlando will forever be an all-timer: evidently, I was one of the few at the sold-out showing who knew anything beforehand… the first act, people were laughing and scoffing at the film. Once the scares happened—the mood drastically changed, and the crowd was terrified.

Ever since then, I enjoyed seeing most of the sequels on the big screen, even if the crowd experience w/ those was never as incredible as the first movie. Yeah, the story for the franchise was clearly made up on the fly with each movie-no way could Oren Peli have predicated this would receive five sequels. At home, what a goofy movie this is. Yeah, they tried for meta commentary at times and the family we follow feature a goofy pair of brothers that drink Pabst Blue Ribbon, get stoned and have facial hair, including one sporting a pornstache!

Still, this is a motion picture where this family find a souped-up 80’s camcorder custom-built with six lenses and this allows them (alongside the viewer) to “see spirits,” meaning swirly shapes. That is goofy-not to mention how they found VHS tapes of another family at the house. Otherwise, it felt familiar as Tobi the spirit-yes, that’s the official canon spelling, not Toby- targets the little girl of the family-the types of scares also felt old hat by this point when the movie wasn’t utterly preposterous. There is a franchise resolution of sort, although even a decade ago I was like the mainstream in thinking it wasn’t entirely satisfying for a series that involved witches, cults, time travel, and general weirdness.

For all the flaws contained in Ghost Dimension, I still don’t hate the movie-blame my affinity and connection with the franchise. For better or for worse, it popularized the found footage genre, a trend (or plague, depending on your tastes) popular for years. In my original review for Ghost Dimension, the purported claims of this being the finale were met somewhat skeptically by me. Of course, there was a standalone sequel that gave off the stench of “it has hardly anything to do w/ the rest of the series” so that’s why I never gave Next of Kin a chance. Will curiosity ultimately win me over in the future?

Night of the Juggler, Revisited

This is a cult classic from 1980 that I reviewed over a decade ago; finally, I watched the restored 4K version that I bought on disc two months ago: 

Finally, I watched the 4K disc I’ve had of this film for the past two months. Night of the Juggler I first learned about many years ago via a messageboard-in fact, it was seen and reviewed by me almost 11 years ago already. At the time, everyone only had VHS rips or rips off of rare cable TV airings—for reasons still unknown to me, until Kino Lorber this year, Juggler never made it to the disc era. There certainly were rumors-including that the rights were owned by a soap company (?!) and they prevented release. No matter the truth, the UHD quality sure beat the initial viewing.

The movie is as loud and chaotic as its hot summer day New York City setting. James Brolin is a working blue-collar man (truck driver) who is an ex-cop; he has an ex-wife but still loves his daughter Kathy, who is celebrating her 13th birthday that day. Kathy is kidnapped by a psychopath after being mistaken for the daughter of a rich property developer who purportedly ruined his South Bronx childhood neighborhood.

Brolin’s Sean Boyd witnesses the kidnapping-his rage meter runs hot for hours-the movie is one set during a long day and night. A particularly wild scene is early on-Boyd hops in a cab driven by an OOT Puerto Rican. Sure, that character’s portrayed by a young Mandy Patinkin (decidedly not of Puerto Rican heritage) but that part was hysterical and his screentime was brief. There’s car chases, foot chases, carjackings, fights, stabbings, brawls, etc. in a vibrant New York City. Shooting on vacation was a key asset in bringing character to this film. Another colorful character was Dan Hedaya, playing even more of a Hedaya-esque character than typical. Various different ethnicities are shown & the finale takes place during a salsa concert in Central Park.

Sure, the movie has moments and lines definitely of a “politically incorrect” nature 45 years after the fact-including racial slurs-but that’s the vibes of the film. Boyd (who limps for part of the film because Brolin broke his foot during filming) feels he can’t trust the typical NYC law enforcement, instead relying on people like street-smart Julie Carmen. One of my favorite aspects is seeing the bad New York City of old; well, plenty of that is on display, from Bronx locations that look like a warzone to the adult establishments that used to fill Manhattan.

Night of the Juggler is wildly entertaining, often fast-paced and a product of its time in the best ways. The main cast was quite enjoyable, not just Brolin as the loving albeit loose cannon father who delivers a great physical performance. Cliff Gorman was suitably creepy as villain Gus Soltic-in another sign this was from the past, his relationship with Kathy becomes what I’ll deem “increasingly inappropriate.” He does have a somewhat wise scheme to get the ransom money-the film also has a somewhat credible path for Sean to follow to find his daughter in such a populated area. Thankfully there’s Richard S. Castellano as a Lieutenant who is gruff yet is a cop who attempts to do his job right.

The special features haven’t been dived into yet; the presumption is that there will be an explanation as to why the movie was first filmed by Sidney J. Furie but was replaced by Robert Butler. In any event, if the description sounds enticing and tasty for your palette, Night of the Juggler is well worth a viewing.