Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things

Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things (1972)

Runtime: 86 minutes

Directed by: Bob Clark

Starring: A cast mainly full of non-actors, including future director Alan Ormsby and his wife at the time, Anya

From: Brandywine/Motionarts Films

What a movie to see as I finally subscribe to Shudder again. A few months ago I decided to take what was supposed to be a brief pause but it lasted for many more weeks than expected. I returned and saw that this was one of the many movies they added in the meantime. As the title amused me and I viewed another collaboration between Bob Clark and Alan Ormsby (Deathdream, i.e. Dead of Night), why not check this out? I knew beforehand that the production was rather sparse and was filmed in like two weeks in Florida.

Alan, the leader of a theatrical troupe (Ormsby himself) takes his charges to an island off the coast of Miami that served as a potter’s field. He wants to… dig up a corpse then do a Satanic ritual to resurrect it?! Yes. The movie is a horror-comedy, see, and there’s plenty of dialogue. The “gore” consists of red paint on bodies, although the zombie effects look good, especially considering that Ormsby also contributed to those in this affair that is said to have cost only $50,000. Of course the ritual goes awry; is it really a spoiler to mention that multiple zombies appear?

The movie won’t be for all tastes. It’s full of goofy characters; they mainly cower and are unwilling to stand up to their arrogant & increasingly tyrannical leader as his behavior becomes more macabre/tasteless. Yet I managed to be charmed by this silly film, one where most of the character names are the same as the actors that portrayed them. There is some tremendous 70’s clothing, especially from Alan. Hopefully none of the directors that are my Letterboxd mutuals ever act like the character, but if you ever decide to dress in his ensemble, I’d be pleased! I’m sure you could pull off the combo of bright orange silk shirt, red/white tie, and multicolored striped pants…

At times even I can admit the movie seems to be spinning its wheels until the action picks up; that said, there’s plenty of colorful dialogue, hit or miss comedy that seemed like a college improv group goofing off (to steal a line; many of the main cast WERE friends at the time) and various moments that kept my attention. One was wondering if Alan’s wife at the time-Anya-was just acting spaced-out or not… actually, I shouldn’t say that as she didn’t act that way in Deathdream. I was just amused by her bizarre character the most. Heck, randomly out of nowhere she pulled out what I would normally describe as a Leatherface mask but given the year, an Ed Gein mask would be the best descriptor. Fitting that Clark and Ormsby would soon after this make Deranged, something I still need to experience.

For all its low-budget faults, there’s also low-budget charm and it does manage to possess many creepy moments even before business picks up and the zombie attack is legit effective. Plenty will think Children is just boring and dumb but the movie worked for me based on what the filmmakers were going for. It manages to be memorable despite its DIY nature and for me was more chilling & just plain interesting than many modern horror efforts.