Jimi Hendrix

This is a 1973 documentary (or rockumentary, if you will) focused on the legendary musician: 

About time I cleared this documentary off of the DVR. You see, TCM played it way back in late April; despite enjoying the music of Hendrix for many, many years, it was just last night that I felt like putting the needle on the record.

The film was about what I expected: after some searing concert footage, his life story is told through interviews w/ a wide variety of people in his life… his fellow musicians who if they didn’t work with him, admired him as a guitar God, women he was involved with, and even Jimi’s father Al. There is also some archival clips from Hendrix himself. The songs the viewer hears aren’t all of his most famous tunes by any means, yet there’s plenty that is familiar: Hey Joe, Purple Haze, Red House, his covers of Wild Thing, Like a Rolling Stone, & Johnny B. Goode.

Technically, I could carp about how not all the interview footage shot by this team was in focus, and in 2023, not everyone will enjoy seeing either Pete Townshend or Eric Clapton on screen… let’s not discuss the reasons why! I will give this credit for honesty: drug use is discussed-and even shown at one point-even though that was how he died (probably… circumstances of how he passed away are still controversial now), and he also “had plenty of women” as his fame skyrocketed. My opinion is slanted due to my high opinion of his music but this was a documentary I’m glad to have witnessed; sure, learning more about the man himself would have been nice, but there’s Wikipedia for that and the performances were sublime.

Little Richard was the most colorful character review, because of course he was. When I finally subscribe to MAX again, the new documentary Little Richard: I Am Everything will have to be viewed; unquestionably it will greatly entertain me.

The Big Heat

The Big Heat (1953)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Fritz Lang

Starring: Glenn Ford, Gloria Grahame, Lee Marvin, Alexander Scourby, Jocelyn Brando

From: Columbia

I happened to pick a great noir to be my last one for November, 2023. Of course, in hindsight this was one that should have been seen MUCH sooner. After all, it's a gritty genre example from Fritz Lang where Glenn Ford is an honest cop who is on the warpath against corrupt SOB's which only escalates after a tragedy occurs. Heck, it feels like something you'd get right out of a 70's revenge movie, so of course I loved it.

A cop's suicide sparks an investigation. Ford is straightforward Sergeant Dave Bannion who starts asking too many questions; see, that case involves a mob boss who runs the city and unfortunately, part of the department is on his payroll. Bannion has a nice wife and young daughter; like I said, tragedy happens and that's when the movie becomes real dark as Ford starts to exhibit behavior not too different from the louts that the mob boss has as goons... goons like Lee Marvin, who even back then played a heel excellently, and Gloria Grahame as Marvin's moll.

Not surprising that with all the genres Lang could handle quite well, film noir was another where he shined while telling such a dark tale. I haven't watched all his genre examples by any means but this has to be his best—there is great filmmaking craft throughout, for example. Of course, how ruthless the story became is due to the script and the excellent performances from Ford, Marvin and Grahame playing such fascinating characters made for a gripping hour and a half. I dare not spoil the all-timer scene which revealed what a vile character Marvin's Vince Stone was, or the other moments that made me think this was just like a 70's revenge tale and a plot perfect for a neo-noir. It is in fact pretty despicable (at least in this universe) to look the other way and live a comfortable life because you don't want to rock the boat and instead it is key to live it up no matter who else is devastated by that corruption.

Don't be a kitten who lost its mitten like me: if you enjoy the genre yet haven't felt the singe of The Big Heat yet, it's a mistake you should rectify ASAP.

Cutter's Way

Cutter’s Way (1981)

Runtime: 105 minutes

Directed by: Ivan Passar

Starring: Jeff Bridges, John Heard, Lisa Eichhorn, Ann Dusenberry, Stephen Elliott

From: United Artists

A very good neo-noir… that I only need to see once. Personally, movies focused on tragic, tremendously flawed characters can be more than worthwhile if done correctly-that doesn’t mean I want to take such a journey often. The movie is centered on Jeff Bridges living with John Heard and Lisa Eichhorn; the trio are alcoholics and what a bombastic character Heard plays. His Alex Cutter is an acidly bitter Vietnam War vet who became physically handicapped; lest you have too much sympathy for Cutter, his first scene involves him casually using the N-word to describe a Black man… who is within earshot. He then doesn’t apologize for the incident; at best you can feel sorry for Cutter but you are not meant to like him.

Ostensibly the film is about Bridges (his character is named RICHARD BONE for some reason) seeing a body dumped into a garbage bin on a rainy night when his Austin-Healy broke down-not a surprise for an old British sports car-and Cutter wants to investigate with the murdered woman’s sister Ann Dusenberry. However, the crux of the focus is the characters and their interaction w/ each other; Bone starts to tire of his increasingly erratic and brash buddy Cutter. As others have duly noted, you probably will be reminded of a certain 90’s movie starring Jeff Bridges…

It's a dark journey straight out of a 70’s film which I was happy to see once; it is incredibly downbeat yet IMO it was not so miserable that it was an unpleasant trip. Bridges and especially Eichhorn deserve their flowers too for their characters that you’ll also be frustrated with due to their occasional narcissistic qualities. However, the pompous, searing, and rage-filled performance from Heard is what Mix in a Jack Nitzsche score, stylized cinematography Jordan Cronenweth which achives a certain aesthetic and the solid direction of Ivan Passar & while it is possible you’ll be turned off by the leads (which isn’t an invalid response, IMO), I was happy to have finally seen the film.

 

$10,000 Blood Money

$10,000 Blood Money (10,000 Dolari Per Un Massacro) (1967)

Runtime: 97 minutes

Directed by: Romolo Guerrieri

Starring: Gianni Garko, Claudio Camaso, Loredana Nusciak, Pinuccio Ardia, Adriana Ambesi

From: Zenith Cinematografica/Flora Film

This is one of those films where you don’t want to read the plot description beforehand; OK, the one on Arrow’s streaming site (where I saw the flick last night) is ambiguous enough but the ones on IMDb and even Letterboxd itself give too much away. While there was 1966’s Django and 1987’s Django Strikes Again-yes, there was one official Django sequel which starred Franco Nero; I don’t blame most for not knowing this as it probably wasn’t until a year ago that I discovered this fact-the film sometimes known as 10,000 Dollars for a Massacre is one of many that had a character w/ this name. It happened to be played by Gianni Garko here, best known for his takes on Sartana and I’d never seen him look more like Franco Nero; there was an obvious stylistic choice.

The plot sounds simple enough: a heel named Manuel kidnaps someone’s daughter as a bit of revenge—thus, this person hires Django to get her back. That said, this is more complicated than you’d first be led to believe. Django is someone who only agrees to the bounty after he’s offered… $10,000. There is a relationship with a woman; it’s also a relationship where feelings pivot on a dime more than once, but I can accuse a great Western or two of similar behavior. Unlike those plot descriptions, I won’t spoil the surprises.

There were some colorful characters; this includes Manuel’s father (the old “constantly laughing old outlaw” stereotype I’ve seen in other Spaghetti Westerns) and Django’s photographer friend. There are badass moments and some creative deaths, sure… personally, the biggest highlight was a score that at first sounded like just a riff on Morricone-which it was-before it pivoted into different directions. I really do rate it highly; it happened to be from a woman, Nora Orlandi, of The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh fame. There’s never been many female composers, whether classically or in the film world-that is unfortunate.

The movie makes its influences blatant; Loredana Nusciak plays a role not that dissimilar to her appearance in Django; Manuel is played by Claudio Camaso, the younger brother of Gian Maria Volante. Much to my relief, this has enough differences from a archetypical Spaghetti Western (such as being surprisingly subdued) to earn bonus points and thus make me feel that this was pretty good.

Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas!

Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas (2014)

Runtime: 79 agonizing minutes

"Directed" by: Darren Doane

"Starring": Cameron, Doane, and people best not to mention here to save their reputation

From: Samuel Goldwyn Films, who should have known better

I never thought I’d see myself in this position, but here we go… as typical, discussion on a messageboard gave me the idea to finally see this infamous motion picture. It has to be clarified right away that for those reading this of who are of faith and are proud to call themselves Christians, please not that my review will NOT be an attack on anyone who thinks that “they should put Christ back into Christmas” or should be insulting to those devoted people. Rather, I will discuss why a guy who comes off as a weirdo w/ a lack of self-awareness failed spectacularly in his justification to love the commercialized aspects of the holiday while being a Christian at the same time in a poorly made, totally amateur motion picture.

Cameron manages to bash both atheists who have “taken over” Christmas and the fundamentalist Christians who think that the holiday is too materialized; what is the saying about having your cake and eating it too? Much of the movie is Cameron’s character trying to convince his brother-in-law (Christian; yes, his name was Christian) that the commercial aspects of Christmas aren’t “pagan” in nature and thus he should enjoy Christmas trees, nutcrackers, and the other items that have become iconography for the holiday. The brother-in-law Christian is portrayed as a sanctimonious buffoon & presents flimsy strawman arguments which Cameron tries to refute—“tries” the key word here. His validation is just weak and flimsy for each talking point; some were obviously bunk those that know more than me say the other validations were at best misleading and at worst, total poppycock.

That’s not even taking into account the generally poor filmmaking craft that’s constantly on display, how cheap the movie appears, the off-putting attempts at “humor”, the generally weird points that Cameron sometimes attempts to make (I don’t even know what his stance was on conspiracy theorists; yes, there was a scene devoted to that); even if you aren’t put off by Kirk & his over-inflated ego smugly preaching to the audience, the “acting” and the “storytelling” alone is off-putting to the extreme. Darren Doane deserves plenty of condemnation also—he not only directed, produced, and wrote the movie, he portrayed Christian… rather poorly, to be frank. Heck, the film effectively ends at around the 55 minute mark and the credits roll 70 minutes in; there is plenty of padding, which I’ll explain in a moment.

This at times made me wonder if Cameron had all his marbles. The movie made me cringe often at how pathetic it was; the nadir was an extended dance sequence; yes, Kirk, Doane and other weird dorky white people do their vanilla version of “busting a move” to a terrible “electronic” version of Angels We Have Heard on High! That sequence is never-ending, to boot; you’ll never cringe harder at lame middle-aged Doane “breakdancing” or lame middle-aged Cameron doing the worm! By comparison, the “outtakes” that pad the ending credits are great.

As I’ve seen Christians on Letterboxd note that they hated the movie, that’s why I feel more free to note that this seemed like a shallow justification for Kirk Cameron to justify his wealth. Please don’t ever watch Saving Christmas during the holidays… or at any time.

Thanksgiving (The Movie)

So, my plans changed; I was able to write a review for the film after arriving home from a 12:10 PM screening of it today. I posted that on Letterboxd before I left that town I was staying in to come back home. Now that I am back home now, onto posting the review here: 

Thanksgiving (2023)

82% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 114 reviews)

Runtime: 106 minutes

Directed by: Eli Roth

Starring: Patrick Dempsey, Nell Verlaque, Gabriel Davenport, Jalen Thomas Brooks, Addison Rae

From: TriStar/Spyglass Media Group

Well, you can't say I did not see this in an appropriate setting. Wednesday afternoon, I made a 3 hour drive to a different part of Florida for Thanksgiving; as people from literally all over the world follow me (a fact which will never not blow my mind) on Letterboxd, in the United States that is always the fourth Thursday each November. Those festivities went well. As I had free time in the early afternoon today, why not use my AMC A-List pass to visit the city's cineplex for the first time? Much to my chagrin, the place was straight out of the early 90's; I mean, the days even before stadium seating, those old uncomfortable chairs, etc. The sound bled over from the next auditorium, which was most regrettable. Except for that, it WAS a fitting place to see a new film based on a 2007 trailer for a film which aped the grindhouse experience & the implied setting in that trailer was the 80's.

Only a small part of that trailer carried over into this film, which was set in modern times. I was crestfallen no one stated, “It's blood...”, then a police officer responded, “Son of a...” I'd love to have seen Michael Biehn say it again, but it could have been anyone else. Regardless, what helped the most at my screening was a small but raucous crowd. Thank heavens they didn't flap their gums during the screening but did laugh uproariously at the humor far more than I did and most importantly, had the pitch-perfect reactions to all the graphic gore, not to mention the killer's reveal. If not for them, perhaps all the F-bombs would have been more grating, or the story holes would have been more obvious, or the lack of subtlety would have stuck out more. Then again, I shouldn't complain too hard in any case; at least this isn't drab, somber, dreary “elevated horror” which is not only pretentious, but a lack of color saturation seems to be a prerequisite.

As for the story, a tragic event happens Thanksgiving night, so the next year the killer looks for revenge on those that they deem responsible. A John Carver mask is worn; unless you're a history buff, you won't know that John Carver was one of the original pilgrims that came over on the Mayflower & landed on Plymouth Rock in 1620.

For all its faults, at least this tried to be a fun slasher with practical gore that certainly entertained my crowd... along w/ me. The young cast that I didn't really know for the most part were fine; yes, this includes Addison Rae, who at least isn't being eviscerated like she was in reviews for He's All That. The fact that her role was supporting probably helped. For someone that age-wise is old enough to be the father of those high school kids, they were stereotypically dumb to me... in the beginning. It was nice seeing Patrick Dempsey and Gina Gershon; would you believe she's 61 years old right now? Doesn't look it... I mention that for no particular reason. There WAS a minor character best described as “Steve Buscemi as an 18 year old”, more in voice & attitude than appearance; I wouldn't have minded more of him.

Otherwise, there's the standard red herrings and a plot which perhaps wouldn't pass scrutiny upon second viewing. But, there still were solid laughs (I wouldn't dare spoil the best gag), there is a cat which did NOT die, and I am thankful... this was not a TURKEY. OK, one of the production companies (Spyglass Media Group) apparently were the ones that fired Melissa Barrera from the seventh Scream movie, but that has no effect on the rating and how about I quickly end this review NOW before asking for a gigantic s---storm in the comments...

Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone

Tuesday night, I revisited a pair of films via the DVR. The first was the Charles Bronson 10 to Midnight & the second, Whoopi Goldberg's Fatal Beauty. Both work as preposterous and trashy yet fun pieces of 80's entertainment. Saturday will be the return of proper reviews.

Shakedown (The Noir From 1950, Not the 80's Film)

Shakedown (1950)

Runtime: 80 minutes

Directed by: Joseph Pevney

Starring: Howard Duff, Brian Donlevy, Peggy Dow, Lawrence Tierney, Bruce Bennett

From: Universal

A noir for Noirvember that I heard described as being a 1950 version of Nightcrawler… sign me up. I don’t even recall how I first heard of this relatively obscure genre example but its availability on YouTube and the presence of some familiar noir faces (Howard Duff, Brian Donlevy, Bruce Bennett) further intrigued me.

Duff plays Jack Early-what a name-who works for a newspaper as a photographer and is best described as “unscrupulous.” Actually, that is too mild for Early… after first presenting himself as a desperate do-gooder who just wants a shot at a job as he’s desperate for work, his true colors shine and he’s a master manipulator who treats people rather brashly all for the purposes of advancing his career, figuratively discarding them when no longer needed & getting filthy rich. He boldly attempts to romance two women who are already attached, including a gangster’s moll. No wonder one character proclaims he’s a “ruthless opportunist” who will inevitably have a nasty downfall.

Perhaps it is a little far-fetched that this avaricious SOB didn’t suffer his final fate much sooner with his refusal to cower back and in fact acting defiant against multiple criminals as the name Jack Early became more famous. Be that as it may, I was still fascinated by the destructive lead and Duff’s portrayal of the character. Both Peggy Dow and Anne Vernon as the female targets of Early’s desires stand out for their different yet both compelling characters. As others have noted, both Dow and Vernon are still alive in their 90’s. By the by, this also features Lawrence Tierney; he thankfully has more to do than in The Prowler, playing exactly the character you’d expect him to. Oh, and an uncredited Rock Hudson briefly appears as a doorman.

This genre is a great one as even films many haven’t heard of can be a pleasant surprise and be incredibly amoral or contain some shocking moments.

The Prowler

The Prowler (1981)

Runtime: 89 minutes

Directed by: Joseph Zito

Starring: Vicky Dawson, Christopher Goutman, Cindy Weintraub, Lawrence Tierney, Farley Granger,

From: Sandhurst

According to hearsay, this is proper prep work before viewing the new Eli Roth picture Thanksgiving. At least, that is according to more than one mutual who has already reviewed the movie; they’ve said it’s a blend of this movie and other films which could be spoilers for all I know. Then again, whether or not those individuals were just referring to the opening act structure or something more is a mystery to me… don’t tell me as within the upcoming week you should expect a review of Thanksgiving from me.

As I’ve known of The Prowler for years yet never pulled the trigger, might as well view a film from a director who found success later (Joseph Zito, who directed both one of the most entertaining Chuck Norris movies in Invasion USA but also one of the best Friday the 13th films in The Final Chapter) and had effects work from the GOAT Tom Savini. This was not as good as Invasion USA or Friday the 13th Part 4: The Final Chapter-nor My Bloody Valentine for that matter, which this shares plot beats with-but was still a good time. After all, a killer dressed in military fatigues along with someone having a mental breakdown because they were dumped while serving overseas during World War II does stand out for creativity.

Specifically, a lady named Rosemary did this. Once this unknown beau returns, she and her new man are murdered during the night of a graduation dance; this killed the enthusiasm to have the dance after 1945; it was only brought back in 1980, so of course the killing starts anew. The story does lag at times and nothing about the plot is spectacular; thank heavens then that the Savini effects are still effective & the kills we do get are rather brutal.

Farley Granger appears for a few scenes, which at least is more than the thankless brief role Lawrence Tierney had. The film’s sleepy vibes-to borrow a phrase-won’t be for everyone but manages to be a slasher that actually explores an interesting theme or two. Hopefully Thanksgiving will give me similar thoughts; hopefully Eli Roth’s new film features an amazing 80’s rock band wearing jeans & sport coats like the band here (Nowhere Fast).

I Watch a Charlie Chaplin Short

Specifically, 1918's A Dog's Life: 

After a night off from watching cinema on Friday night, last night was a return to normal. A recent realization was that not only had it been over a year since I’d see any Charlie Chaplin, there had been more viewed by me from Keaton and Lloyd than from The Tramp himself. Thus, a popular short available on the Criterion Channel was selected.

Indeed it was The Tramp who was portrayed here, along with a dog literally named Scraps. He has bad interactions w/ the police (a mutual used the phrase ACAB; no comment), can’t find work at the unemployment office, and engages in various hijinks w/ Scraps. For example, he has to steal food to survive; you can’t get mad at him for that, right? Again, no comment on that—and actual thieves who steal wallets become the main plot in the second half. There are even some Chaplin family members who appear throughout.

As expected, there are plenty of creative sight gags and pratfalls through this 34 minute short. It’s more than just getting to see a cute dog, although I enjoyed that as a fan of canines; many other dogs are seen in one scene. A bar known as the Green Lantern is sometimes seen; there was no Hal Jordan around, let alone Hector Hammond. There is even time for romance in this tale where I’ll be doggone if a good time wasn’t had.

Safe in Hell

Safe in Hell (1931)

Runtime: 73 minutes

Directed by: William A. Wellman

Starring: Dorothy Mackaill, Donald Cook, Ralf Harolde, John Wray, Ivan F. Simpson

From: Warner Bros.

What a buckwild movie this is. This month, the Criterion Channel added a Pre-Code Divas section; I was intrigued. A few in the collection I had viewed before, but this was new to me… despite knowing of it for awhile. Even by Pre-Code standards, its frankness took me aback. It was also a gem from William A. Wellman, who was a quality director but I’d never seen anything like this from him.

Gilda is a young lady who because of awful circumstances must become a prostitute. She is assigned to a John who turns out to be an A-hole she knew previously. An accident happens so she skips town w/ her sailor beau, who just returned to town. This happens before the 10-minute mark hits. They travel to a fictitious Caribbean island of Tortuga and she has to chill there in a hotel until the scandal blows over. Regrettably for her, the men that reside in the hotel are unrepentant horndogs, real lecherous SOB’s who are excited that she is “the only white woman on the island” (an actual line of dialogue) and are upset that they “haven’t gotten to first base with her”-another line of dialogue, and I had no idea that term’s etymology went back that far. Even worse, the island’s jailer has also taken a shine to her.

Not only was this incredibly provocative, Safe in Hell was also rather harsh in tone. Yet this ride was endlessly enthralling for all its 73 minutes; a shame the Hays Code era was to begin in a few years. That prevented us from getting bold films filled w/ mature themes and decisions such as having two of the most honorable characters in that hellhole be Black: Clarence Muse as the hotel’s porter and Nina Mae McKinney as the hotel’s bartender. The performers were popular at the time so perhaps that was the reason why most of their dialogue wasn’t horribly stereotypical and they had dignity.

In another universe, Barbara Stanwyck or Lilian Bond could have played Gilda; Dorothy Mackaill is an actor unfamiliar to me; then again, many of her silent films are lost and almost all her sound movies are Pre-Code and are incredibly obscure. What a performance from her; the character had to go through a gamut of emotions and also had to be likable as she was forced to be a sex worker to survive and is a gal who decides to stay faithful to her boyfriend despite the maelstrom she stepped into of a phalanx of sweaty, lustful men pining for her. Fatalistic is a word I used in a recent review; it also applies here. There are enough fun moments where this was not 73 minutes of pure misery or a difficult sludge to get through.

Ponniyin Selvan: Part II

Ponniyin Selvan: Part II (2022)

Runtime: 164 minutes

Directed by: Mani Ratnam

Starring:  Vikram, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan, Karthi, Jayam Ravi, Trisha Krishnan

From: Several Indian companies

This will be an easy review for me to do; much of the content will be copied and pasted from my review of Part 1, done three months ago: 

“This Tamil-language picture was chosen as I heard it wasn’t the bats--- insanity of RRR (as fun as that is, variety is the spice of life) but instead was a 'historical action' movie based on a 1950’s novel where they tried to bring it to screen pretty much since then, only happening in these modern times. Of course, this still has multiple scenes of one dude beating up many at the same time--and here, one dude is flung by an elephant’s trunk into an impalement!

The setting is the 10th century and I understand is loosely based on real-life events. It sounds simple on the surface (in the Chola kingdom, there are political machinations, so the Emperor’s son tasks his buddy with delivering a message to his sisters) but of course it is more complicated as presented. A lot happens-none of which I dare spoil-none of which is difficult to follow despite the surplus of characters. Various entities wish to rule the Chola kingdom, and I’ll leave it at that. One surprising comparison I’ll make-and others have made: you may be reminded of… Braveheart.

Most of the actors I was not familiar with (the one name big to me: the still-lovely Aishwarya Rai Bachchan) but nonetheless this was a solid production which at times has great lighting-including the musical numbers-and despite some improbable action beats, the overall production was relatively grounded. The director (Mani Ratnam) is a veteran around for decades who gave us a serious crime movie well worth tracking down-1987’s Nayakan.”

Part 2 is more of the same, which was fine as I liked the first installment. There were some scenic locations and heavy drama mixed into the action beats and yes, musical numbers. Personally, it was a long yet at times rewarding journey after watching those two lengthy pictures.

The Lower Depths

The Lower Depths (Zondoko) (1957)

Runtime: 125 minutes

Directed by: Akira Kurosawa

Starring: Toshiro Mifune, Isuzu Yamada, Kyoko Kagawa, Ganjiro Nakamura, Minoru Chiaki

From: Toho

I saw this film due in part to request. A few days ago, a Letterboxd mutual asked me if I had any list here of Akira Kurosawa; specifically, one which ranked his films. Until last night, I had seen a dozen of his pictures but hadn’t created a list until I compiled one to fulfill that request. After seven days of slapstick comedy, something far more serious was in order. Thus, why not go with a Kurosawa I hadn’t viewed before? Sure, I don’t love this like I do the other Kurosawa movies I’ve raved over… that isn’t a slight on this and more on how great many of his pictures were.

I haven’t viewed the ’36 French movie from Jean Renoir (which had to be more upbeat due to the rise of Hitler and the politics in the country at the time; I stole that fact from the Criterion Channel), let alone the old Russian play from the greatly-named Maxim Gorky. Ostensibly, it’s a hardscrabble tale set in a tenement slum populated with poor, literally dirty characters; Toshiro Mifune--who I also have a list of on Letterboxd-has a romantic relationship with a lady but then attempts a relationship with her sister. However, there are also various ancillary characters which do add character to the story and it was fascinating seeing those personalities interact w/ each other, including the guy whose “bitol organs” are ruined due to alcoholism; there are plenty of others but I won’t spoil it for those that want to give this a shot in the future.

It is not a cheery pick-me-up sort of motion picture; after all, I’ve seen it described as both “fatalistic” and “Nietzschean.” That doesn’t mean there are not humorous moments or even scenes featuring people breaking out into song… both occur in The Lower Depths. It’s a thematically rich and usually interesting film which albeit was obviously adapted from a stage play about social realism; that aspect wasn’t too much a hindrance for me, but YMMV. Even if there are Kurosawa pictures I’d rather revisit first before doing the same w/ this, at least it was an interesting film and will be a gem for some.

Curse of the Pink Panther

Curse of the Pink Panther (1983)

Runtime: 110 minutes

Directed by: Blake Edwards

Starring: Ted Wass, the returning faces from previous installments

From: United Artists

While this franchise went down the toilet in the 80’s-& apparently 1993’s Son of the Pink Panther is just as putrid-at least the first five were quite enjoyable and I was happy to have finally gone through a series that should have been explored by me YEARS ago. I’d never gone through a franchise like this all in a row; hopefully everyone enjoyed (or at least not minded) although I’m now delighted to return to my typical wide variety starting w/ my next review. Judging by Letterboxd views, a large percentage of Pink Panther fans didn’t even bother with the rest of the franchise; might as well have those people hear about those movies from me, right?

Now, Curse turning out so badly was unfortunate and I don’t entirely blamed Ted Wass for that, as ill-suited as he was for the part. It could have been John Ritter playing the role (one of my Letterboxd mutuals will be crestfallen that this didn’t happen) and director Edwards wanted Rowan Atikinson-which is quite the idea as that was even before Blackadder, let alone Mr. Bean-but I don’t think either could have made this much better when the story was so tired and the gags either lame rehashes of better material or weird ideas that don’t really work, such as a long segment involving a blowup doll… don’t ask.

Curse continues the “plot” began in Trail. Clouseau is still missing so Dreyfus is asked to find another great detective to find him. He sabotages a talking computer (it’s the early 80’s, so people still thought that a talking sentient AI computer could be a thing) so it finds an incompetent NYC police sergeant played by Wass who just wasn’t as charming as Clouseau no matter how inept he acted. He tries to find both Clouseau and the Pink Panther diamond. What follows is buffoonery that usually isn’t terribly entertaining.

Not even the contributions of a name actor in a weird role, Leslie Ash sparking some excitement w/ her role that is sadly all too brief, and some decent action scenes made me enjoy this bomb of a film. They tried to give Clouseau a send-off (based on ideas from the proposed Romance of the Pink Panther film; as someone elsewhere informed me, that script is easily found online… and it is) but it has weird implications so your opinion of the character’s final fate is up for debate. Let’s see—there is also the opening credits where we see the Pink Panther cartoon character leave a 7-Eleven for absolutely no reason as this version of the classic theme uses what sounds like a Moog, given that there’s literally 20 seconds of random bleeps and bloops heard.

It was nice to see Niven (his final role; he died right before this was released), Capucine and Robert Wagner back together, even if it was a pale imitation of what they did in The Pink Panther 20 years beforehand-and Curse was a pale imitation of the series in the 60’s and 70’s. Alas, it would have been ideal if certain entities had not tried to Chase the Dragon and attempt to continue the idea way past its expiration point… no, I won’t check out Steve Martin’s version of Clouseau, either. I suppose there is the benefit of small miracles: if this hadn’t flopped so hard, we could have had up to FIVE more movies starring Wass as Sgt. Clifton Sleigh. No kidding, the studio wanted to continue the series w/ that new character. Thank goodness we aren’t in that part of the multiverse.

 

Trail of the Pink Panther

Trail of the Pink Panther (1982)

Runtime: 96 minutes

Directed by: Blake Edwards

Starring: Stock footage of Peter Sellers, returning regulars, returning names from way back when, Joanna Lumley, Richard Mulligan

From: United Artists

As infamous as this film is, it does give me plenty to discuss. A LOT could be written concerning why Trail happened in the first place despite Inspector Clouseau himself having passed away two years before release. Without the foreknowledge of the history behind the film, you’d think that director Blake Edwards looks pretty bad for dedicating the film to the late Peter Sellers then using deleted footage to try and earn a buck using his name. 

However, United Artists wanted another Pink Panther film and in fact wanted Dudley Moore to play Clouseau instead; both Moore and Edwards balked at that. There’s more that you can read on Wiki if that’s your inclination; the last wife of Sellers sued because Peter never wanted deleted footage to be used during his lifetime, this was shot concurrently w/ Curse and it was a troubled production… no wonder this was a mess, with a variety of different entities giving off a bad look.

The first 40 minutes was the deleted footage of Clouseau blended w/ a standard story of how the Pink Panther diamond was stolen once again, this time in a fashion that would be insultingly simple even if it was not compared w/ the quality heist sequence that opened Return. Despite their best efforts, it was just disjointed & felt like the movie was biding its time until “Clouseau’s plane vanishes;” from this point, reporter Joanna Lumley literally interviews characters from the 60’s Panther movies (David Niven, Capucine, Graham Stark as Hercule Lajoy, who worked w/ Clouseau in A Shot in the Dark) and new characters, such as Clouseau’s father… there was an irritating character I quickly got fed up with.

Robert Loggia returns playing a different gangster character than the one he played in Revenge; that is just one of at least a few puzzling moments throughout Trail. The fact that the movie tells the diamond to f--- off and doesn’t even mention the jewel once the Inspector vanishes is another issue. Worst of all, the movie stops rather than wrap up the plot in a satisfying manner. Curse was a Part 2 to the story but even then, Part 1’s typically feel rewarding while making you want more with the rest of the story. Here, the movie was lackluster even during the few occasions when they showed old Clouseau clips (when I just saw those moments days ago, they did not have any impact in this context) and it did not spurn interest in this tale continuing.

Because I had the time, almost immediately afterwards was Curse of the Pink Panther. That review will come tomorrow night; spoiler: that was NOT a satisfying conclusion to the story that began in Trail of the Pink Panther.

 

Revenge of the Pink Panther

Revenge of the Pink Panther (1978)

Runtime: 98 minutes

Directed by: Blake Edwards

Starring: Peter Sellers, the usual co-stars, Dyan Cannon, Robert Webber, Robert Loggia

From: United Artists

This is more what I like from an Inspector Clouseau movie. Basically ignoring the outlier that was The Pink Panther Strikes Again, Revenge is back to basics. Herbert Lom is back in his old position, Clouseau continues to wear wacky disguises, and Cato actually gets involved with the action instead of being an ancillary character. Robert Webber is the leader of the French Connection is actually the heel here; no, not Alain Charnier. The French Connection was an actual drug trade way back when; their foe that they wish to take out is not Popeye Doyle… it was Inspector Clouseau.

What made this feel not like a total rehash: the heels think that Clouseau was killed in a wreck. Our dim-witted hero had enough of a clue to realize this would be advantageous to him. He also meets up with Webber’s secretary (an incredibly charming Dyan Cannon) who gets dropped she she’s ready to drop the dime on him. What results is entertainment that isn’t as funny as several of the others in the franchise but there’s still some quality pratfalls, wordplay, gags, and a madcap finale that’s literally filled w/ fireworks.

No, I am not giving the movie bonus points for using a DISCO version of The Pink Panther Theme, although it was hilariously of its time. Tragically of its time was the casual racism. In the 70’s installments, Clouseau has referred to Cato as “my little yellow friend” several times, which is not great. Far worse was the yellowface done by Sellers and Cannon in one scene when they are in Hong Kong. Cato having a disguise in Hong Kong of “guy who wears Coke-bottle glasses yet is still blind” is another regrettable stereotype.

Otherwise, this would have been a nice capper to the Pink Panther franchise, due to the declining health of Sellers. Of course, they were thinking of filming one more called Romance of the Pink Panther, and not even the star dying would derail plans of continuing despite the poor taste of doing so. But yes I will be discussing that tomorrow, the infamous reputation of that project aside.