Near Dark

Near Dark (1987)

Runtime: 94 minutes

Directed by: Kathryn Bigelow

Starring: Adrian Pasdar, Jenny Wright, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton, Jenette Goldstein

From: F/M

Caleb could have avoided all this if he had only kept his hormones in check…

“Right before it leaves the Criterion Channel” was perfect for me to check out a film that for reasons unknown to me is rarely found on streaming… at least legally. Given all the talent involved-including a Tangerine Dream score that was as bitchin’ as I suspected-this review was LONG overdue.

In rural Oklahoma Adrian Pasdar’s Cody was a poor dupe who happened to run into Jenny Wright’s Mae one night. Because he was horny and wanted a kiss from her, she turns him into a vampire and he joins their clan. As the clan includes Lance Henriksen, Jenette Goldstein and Bill Paxton (naturally, the highlight for me) it was quite the clan indeed. Even in ’87 vampire lore probably felt hackneyed or at least too familiar; Near Dark at least feels fresh with the way the vampires are portrayed and the traits the film introduced. They were an interesting collection of characters so that alone was enough to keep my attention. Some great aesthetic moments and the score only make it better.

The highlight is an extended scene in a bar which I dare not spoil except that Paxton was hilarious and I was NOT expecting to hear John Parr’s Naughty Naughty as that’s a New Wave tune rather than a George Strait song at a honky tonk place… you DO hear a song from him near the conclusion of said scene. Near Dark simply has a lot of style and while set in modern times, there’s always a Western flavor that permeates throughout. Family is another key theme; all those elements came together to make a vampire picture that has aged like fine wine.

Cut And Run

Cut and Run (Inferno In Diretta) (1985)

Runtime: 88 minutes

Directed by: Ruggero Deodato (RIP)

Starring: Lisa Blount, Leonard Mann, Willie Aames, Richard Lynch, Michael Berryman

From: It’s an Italian movie but New World released it on the United States, and that’s the print I saw

RIP Ruggero Deodato. Before last night I had only seen two of his movies, despite thinking the back half of Cannibal Holocaust is brilliant (except for the whole "slaughtering animals" thing) and one of the best poliziotteschi films is Live Like a Cop, Die Like a Man. As there was nothing I needed or felt like checking out on the last Thursday of 2022, I had a few films that are easily found online. It’s officially on YouTube (via the Filmrise channel; the same cut is also on Tubi) and for a long while now I’ve known of the awesome opening/ending credits song-from Claudio Simonetti-so that’s what I went with.

The most important thing to note now: two different cuts were released back in the 80’s. There was a “tamer” version that was released in the United States, the UK and some other places; the rest of the world got a cut a few minutes longer that includes graphic gore. It wasn’t until after the fact that I learned this. I can always visit the bowe… er, I mean “purchase the Blu-ray from Code Red” for the extended version. Was there anger at missing out on even more sleaze and blood? On the contrary, it was fine to see a movie that was still trashy, still had nudity, and was in HD.

Its cast also stood out: Lisa Blount, Leonard Mann, Richard Lynch, Michael Berryman, Willie Aames (!), Richard Bright, John Steiner, Karen Black for a few minutes, and Eriq La Salle. Turns out, La Salle plays a pimp for several scenes, and imagine my surprise at seeing Berryman as a badass who kills fools via machete; it’s a happy surprise, to clarify. The plot is nonsense revolving around various factions feuding over THE 80’s substance: cocaine. The basic plot is that reporter Blount goes to South America to try and track down Lynch, who not only is part of a drug operation that involves natives and Berryman, but was also a part of Jonestown. I know, kind of skeevy to attach a horrible tragedy to a fictional villain’s backstory; then again, such behavior is almost expected with old Italian genre movies.

The same goes for its occasional incoherent nature. Another plot point is that Aames and the director’s hot younger girlfriend at the time were stuck in the camp. He always wears a Mickey Mouse shirt, which is just classic. What was seemingly implied yet never explicitly stated was that the feud going on in South America had spilled over in America, including a slaughter in Miami straight out of Cocaine Cowboys-the documentary, I mean. As it’s Miami in the 80’s, perhaps Griselda Blanco was responsible for those deaths…

Any criticisms aside, overall I was at least entertained by this nonsense. There are some scares, action scenes, nudity, an 80’s-riffic score, some footage from South Florida-the rest being the scenic areas of Venezuela-blow darts, and animals that thankfully do not die. From now on, I’ll try to see something from the director at least once in a blue moon.

 

Another Buster Keaton Short Was Watched Last Night

This time it was 1921's The High Sign: 

Not only a 21 minute short that fit my schedule last night, but a notice to everyone that sometime next week I’ll finally see Babylon. It’s been awhile since I’ve had any Buster Keaton in my life (will these experiences happen more frequently in ’23? Perhaps) so this was selected as I stumbled across it on YouTube awhile back and kept it in a list for the right time.

Buster cons his way to working at an amusement park; people are led to believe he’s an expert marksman so he’s hired by a gang to kill a target… and the target unknowingly hires him too to take out the gang. There are plenty of sight gags and pratfalls as you’d expect, along with funny intertitles. I don’t want to spoil much except that there’s a very tall man, gun-related jokes, chases, and a house full of trap doors.

It’s never not creative but the final few minutes are especially so—I’m referring both to the plot and the pratfalls. One last note: there is a hand signal that the gang uses; not only is it unique (and is what you see Buster giving on the film’s poster), that is used for more than one gag.

Crimson: The Color Of Blood

Crimson: The Color of Blood (Las Ratas No Duermen De Noche) (1973)

Runtime: 99 minutes

Directed by: Juan Fortuny

Starring: Paul Naschy, Carlos Otero, Ricardo Palmerola, Olivier Mathot, Silvia Solar

From: A few different French and Spanish companies

A movie we could have only gotten from 70’s Europe. Via Arrow’s streaming service adding it earlier in the year was how I learned of a movie that has many different titles; the print that Arrow has is copyrighted 1985 and not only has Anglicized names, it uses the title The Man with the Severed Head that was implemented in the Commonwealth countries. Not only did it star Paul Naschy (a star in the Europe of the past who I’ve seen precious little of) but the plot description both intrigued & puzzled.

You see, some places (including Letterboxd) state that Naschy receives “a head transplant”, yet I saw other places state that it was a brain transplant; while neither is something you can do even now, they are still drastically different procedures! What actually happens: Naschy is a criminal who is part of a heist gone awry; during the getaway, he’s shot in the head. In this universe, it makes sense to go to doctors off-hours and off the grid to do a brain transplant, and-why the hell not?-the brain used is that of Paul’s nemesis, known as The Sadist. Admittedly, a decapitation is done to acquire the brain. It was not even a full transplant; rather, the parts that were damaged by the bullet were taken out and replaced.

The movie is flawed and even I could nitpick; however, that won’t happen as there was just enough to entertain me. It’s a loony story which was treated seriously and if you love sleaze, those feelings will be satisfied. Besides what was originally filmed, someone after the fact added in the most blatant spliced in saucy footage I’ve ever seen. This was unknown to me so the first time it happened was rather staggering. Apropos of nothing, a Naschy henchman suddenly has sex w/ a random woman. There are a few other awkward moments after that of the same description.

I managed to be entertained by this oddity which at least has serious conflict over the end result of the operation, where Naschy struggles with having the feelings of someone else fighting w/ him in his brain. There’s a shootout, groovy music, plenty of skeezy characters, and a random dance act shown in a club done w/ characters you only see in that scene which is Padding with a capital P… at least it was a charming performance performed well.

Talk Radio

Talk Radio (1988)

Runtime: 110 minutes

Directed by: Oliver Stone

Starring: Eric Bogosian, Ellen Greene, Leslie Hope, John C. McGinley, Alec Baldwin

From: Universal

Another movie seen via request. As has happened a decent amount of times by now, a messageboard discussion spurned me watching a film I otherwise wouldn’t have. Someone in a thread brought up Under Siege 2, and brought up the performance of Eric Bogosian as the villain-there was outside the box casting which managed to work… at least from what I remember the last time it was viewed. There was then discussion of Bogosian and I admitted that movie was my only exposure to him… which technically is wrong as he not only provided voices in Beavis and Butt-Head Do America, he apparently is in the “cinematic masterpiece” known as Blade: Trinity. I have no memory of that, and it’s a film I last saw 4 ½ years ago.

A fan of his may have been aghast but for certain recommended Talk Radio. Makes sense, as it was his most famous starring role (it may be his ONLY starring role for all I know), was greatly expanded from his own one-act play and fitting for someone who has been a monologist, this of course is full of dialogue as he portrays a controversial talk radio host. The character of Barry Champlain is one that riles up the dregs of society by targeting hatred and satirical barbs at the callers who phone up the Dallas late-nite radio show he hosts solo. Concerning the views he presents on the show, Bill Maher is perhaps the best comparison and I’ll leave it at that.

The character is also Jewish-Champlain is not his real surname yet he admits his religion-so you know the absolute bottom of the barrel filth that is sometimes directed his way. As some of the callers express some vile views concerning Jewish people, minorities and the like… why was I reminded of social media… oh yeah, because it’s also filled with that trash! I was also reminded of all cable news networks (not just Fox News) and the apparent end goal of angering their viewers.

The key thing to note here: Barry Champlain is a real jerk. It may seem funny at first that he rips apart ignorant people—then you realize he’s a real caustic person who doesn’t treat his love interests well at all, to the point that his ex-wife had rather good reason to leave him. It may not seem enjoyable to follow such a person-some movies like that aren’t appealing to me. Yet, that was the point of the movie—Barry does not realize he’s an SOB who isn’t much better-if at all-than the people he berates and castigates on his show. What a performance from Bogosian, although the cast as a whole is solid and all the leads (Ellen Greene, Leslie Hope, John C. McGinley & his hilarious hair/beard combo, Alec Baldwin) deliver quality performances. Then again, McGinley’s hair is only the third best; what eclipses that will be left for those to see for themselves.

While it’s not the first film I’ve seen by Oliver Stone, it’s the first reviewed here. I mentioned controversy before, and talk about someone who embodies that term. My opinion of him personally won’t be shared here, but in the future more of his work will be discussed here. For a movie mostly set in a radio station, it never was boring between the editing and the cinematography, the latter of which was rather claustrophobic. Talk Radio is not always an easy watch by any means—it was still a great recommendation as it was a fascinating movie about a repulsive, deeply flawed character.

I Revisited Die Hard

It was a movie I've seen many times but as it's a personal favorite it was a real present to experience it on Christmas night.

How The Grinch Stole Christmas!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays, everyone! Due to my schedule I am posting this review at what is a bizarre hour for me. It wasn't the original plan to watch this last night; instead it was something on TV but to my horror it was in the wrong aspect ratio. I'll explain further when I see that movie likely in the far-flung future—for now, this was a more than adequate substitute. After all, I've reviewed both the 2000 live-action film and the 2018 animated film; both are rather lousy even if not compared to something made for television in the 60's that did it much better in only 26 minutes.

It's not a plot I need to elaborate upon so instead I'll mention that its messages are still worth learning today. The animation and music are both fine (except for the one song that's legendary) although of course it's the story and Boris Karloff narrating the plot/voicing the title character that make this stellar. Unlike in the movie versions, the Grinch here is a right bastard, a creature truly a “three decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich with arsenic sauce.” That makes his eventual turn all the more satisfying rather than the bizarre backstories or softening others later attempted with the character. You're a Mean One Mister Grinch is an unforgettable song which explains how rotten Mr. Grinch is using colorful verbiage, sung by the unforgettable vocals of Thurl Ravenscroft.

It's a timeless tale which should have been experienced as an adult WAY sooner than “late last night.” On the other hand, the other classics from the holiday season I saw on television (Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman) can always be reviewed next December.

Day of the Outlaw

Day of the Outlaw (1959)

Runtime: 92 minutes

Directed by: Andre de Toth

Starring: Robert Ryan, Burl Ives, Tina Louise, Alan Marshal, Venetia Stevenson

From: United Artists

It seemed like the perfect movie to watch right before Christmas the day after the majority of the United States was hit with a snowstorm and/or a cold spell. It is part of the Criterion Channel’s “Snow Westerns” collection; that description explains the setting and genre. Furthermore, the main villain is played by Burl Ives, who many best know for either voicing Sam the Snowman in the Rankin-Bass Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer or singing Holly Jolly Christmas. 

After viewing the film, Tarantino obviously saw this before he wrote The Hateful Eight. At the time I enjoyed the movie despite it featuring way too much of a woman being verbally or even physically abused. Upon second viewing away from the theatrical experience, my opinion could very well drop. At least this movie had less of that. The setting is rural Wyoming-actually filmed in rural Oregon-during harsh winter conditions as it’s Robert Ryan (one of the town’s founders) versus one person in particular, Alan Marshal. He claims a “valid” version for the beef but it actually concerns a dame, played by Tina Louise. As the snow is about to melt due to the heat, a gang headed by Ives rolls into town and that greatly complicates matters. You see, he’s shot so is in need of surgery…

Among the compliments I can give is that the characters aren’t always black and white; Ryan comes off as a jerk with his forceful opinions while Ives is a lout who at least doesn’t allow himself or his gang to drink & carouse w/ women until they reached their destination after a recent robbery. There’s plenty of tension as the townspeople deal with the interlopers that are keeping them in their small hamlet; plenty of time is spent in a general store although there’s also plenty of time in an open snowy area then the snowy woods. There are memorable performances although Ol’ Burl was the true highlight. 

To reveal much more would be a crime but it is a treat to see fascinating characters interact w/ each other. The general story can fit any setting (modern times, way in the past, outer space, etc.)-the rural Western setting allowed for a nice tableau and was perfect even for me down here in Florida, where it is cold by the state’s standards.

Conan The Barbarian

Conan the Barbarian (1982)

Runtime: 128 minutes

Directed by: John Milius

Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Earl Jones, Max von Sydow, Sandahl Bergman, Ben Davidson

From: Universal

A good old fashioned sword and sandal adventure… for adults. This was actually watched on Monday night but it fit my schedule best to talk about it now. It was after I had a few alcoholic beverages during the night, which seemed appropriate for a manly John Milius motion picture.

Based on the literary character created by Robert E. Howard-although apparently it was a rather liberal adaptation-it has a rather classical story: as a kid, Conan’s parents are killed by an evil warlord and he’s forced to be a slave. Freed as an adult, he teams up w/ some disparate characters to finally earn his revenge. Simple yet easy to follow and it’s rather easy to root for our heroes… especially Arnold as the title character.

The movie is a bloody good time, in more than one way. The aesthetic, the tough action scenes, the dastardly bad guys, the adult material (the R-rated violence and nudity), the lovely practical effects, the grit, the grime… they don’t make ‘em like this anymore. The cast and the script are big highlights, although to be frank what does the most heavy lifting is a truly epic, bold score from Basil Poledouris that at least made me wish I could be on those adventures w/ Conan. Sure, there are some moments that have aged poorly due to what modern sensibilities are now but it did not ruin what was a fun movie for me that still managed to have various subtleties.