Thursday, March 30, 2017

An Update

I rewatched both Severance and Dredd; both are a lot of fun in their own ways. Tonight I should be watching something new.

Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Life

Life (2017)

66% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 151 reviews)

Runtime: 103 minutes

Directed by: Daniel Espinosa

Starring: Jake Gyllenhaal, Rebecca Ferguson, Ryan Reynolds, Hiroyuki Sanada, Olga Dihovichnaya, Ariyon Bakare

From: Columbia Pictures

Even though for awhile now I have heard that this movie was heavily inspired by Alien (which it was; then again, Alien was not exactly an original idea to begin with), I was hoping that with its cast-headed by three well-known actors-this would at least be acceptable popcorn entertainment. Personally, I thought the movie was just that.

People likely know the general plot of how some astronauts on the International Space Station bring a microscopic alien organism from Mars onto the ship, where things naturally go wrong... various lines suggest that this is the “near future” and not “2017”. In either case, this is not a movie where you want to scrutinize its plot too closely. I know, many films can be labeled as such but I imagine Neil DeGrasse Tyson would be offended by some of the things that happen at the ISS or how NASA is portrayed, even if it's the “near future”.

Even if it's not the most logical movie, it was still one I found to be pretty entertaining. The cast does a swell job, and I appreciated how there was some diversity. It was filmed well and I also appreciated how the scenes were never difficult to make out or comprehend. It was never boring and there are some nasty deaths. While this unfortunately isn't a horror or sci-fi classic that will be beloved for years to come, I am thankful it's not an insufferable bore or a frustrating waste of time, either. I am glad there was a relatively modest R-rated movie that despite its obvious influences was still technically an original idea instead of a damn sequel, superhero movie, reboot, or what have you.

Add in a few moments that I'll vaguely describe as being “like from movies of decades past” and an appropriate ethereal score, and I can happily say this was “fine”, even if I can't say this is something you need to watch theatrically ASAP.

The Holy Virgin vs. The Evil Dead

The Holy Virgin vs. The Evil Dead (1991)

Runtime: 87 minutes

Directed by: Chin-Ku Lu

Starring: Donnie Yen (!), Pauline Yeung, Ben Lam, Hei Man Chui, Ken Lo

From: Chung Ngai Movie Productions/J.S. Productions

Yes, this is a real movie I saw (from Hong Kong, which in general I think is a wacky place), and yes it can be seen for free on Amazon, at least if you have Prime. This English title has nothing to do with the real Cantonese title. Still, this action/horror film is rather bizarre, as I explain below: 

I'll be real here: I only discovered this marvelous motion picture when I stumbled upon it while I was looking for something else on Amazon Prime. The title caught my eye and while I figured the title was something catchy from the foreign distributor-I was right. There are no Deadites or even virgins, although the camera does move around a few times like it's a Raimi film-the plot not only captured my attention, but so did finding out the star was DONNIE YEN. No kidding.

I have to note now that there's more than one version of this out there. The one on Prime is the “tame” version, rather than the original, which I understand has a lot more sex/gore/graphic violence (and a LOT of nudity, apparently) than what I saw tonight. While that's unfortunate, the movie was still so goofy and daffy, it was still something I enjoyed. Yen and some other people deal with what is identified in the subtitles as The Moon Monster. Oh, it's a demon but it looks like a tall Asian man with long flowing hair, because that's who played MM. However, the touch of him sometimes glowing green electricity from his eyes and dressing like The Terminator did after he took Bill Paxton's friend's clothes in the first film... those were unexpected touches.

As I also expected, the movie was rather nonsensical and in fact baffling at times. The fact that the subtitles weren't always in perfect English did not help in that regard. Yet I was still charmed by this wacky film. I laughed out loud a few times; even in neutered film it can be quite entertaining as all those unexpected moments happened and I am bemused at how much of the action is undercranked. I will say it only added to the surreal nature of this tale. I mean, there's people flying on wire, martial arts (including from Moon Monster! Not what you'd expect from a big dude who is often referred to as “the sexual maniac”), charming low-fi special effects, and time spent in Cambodia. Wild, really.

Hopefully one day I can see the full version and I can give this another review, one that will be more accurate.

Monday, March 27, 2017

Don't Bother To Knock

Don't Bother to Knock (1952)

Runtime: 76 minutes

Directed by: Roy Ward Baker

Starring: Richard Widmark, Marilyn Monroe, Anne Bancroft, Donna Corcoran, Elisha Cook, Jr.

From: 20th Century Fox

Here's a movie I did not even hear about until recently, when I stumbled upon it on Netflix Instant. Of course it's leaving Instant in a few days so I watched it late Saturday night. It's an enjoyable film noir, as I explain below: 

It's been way too long since I've seen any film noir, and as this movie will expire from Netflix Instant at the end of the month, this was the perfect time for me to finally get on that wagon. I know that in the future I'll start watching the genre more often than I have been in the past half year.

The movie is set in a fancy New York City hotel in the span of about a few hours. Richard Widmark is a pilot who is hooked up with Anne Bancroft (making her film debut) but he played the type of character you'd expect Richard Widmark to play, meaning “gruff” and “arrogant”, so she wants to end things. He does not take it well. Meanwhile, Marilyn Monroe (her first starring role) is babysitting a young girl-thankfully that character and the actress are both fine-and he wishes for rebound sex with her, to paraphrase using modern vernacular. Most of us who are fans of the ladies would like to do the same thing, but she's not who she first appears to be...

It's not the most hard-boiled of noirs nor is it the darkest or the nastiest or possessing of the toughest dialogue-although there are some good lines. Rather, it's “just” a solid and entertaining noir which never wears out its welcome at only 76 minutes and the cast as a whole is fine (others include Elisha Cook, Jr. and Jim Backus), with the best performances I've ever seen from Marilyn. The film is pretty creepy and unsettling overall, with some unforgettable moments. Sure, there are some stereotypical characters but that didn't bother me too much and as it's all set at night and part of the film is in a bar where jazzy vocal songs are sung, so even though you don't ever see a gun, this definitely is a worthy entry in the genre that I wish would stay on Netflix longer so people would have more of a chance to see it.

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Don't Torture A Duckling

Don't Torture A Duckling (Non Si Sevizia Un Paperino) (1972)

Runtime: 102 minutes

Directed by: Lucio Fulci

Starring: Florinda Bolkan, Barbara Bouchet, Tomas Milian (RIP), Irene Papas, Marc Porel

From: Medusa Distribuzione

Here's another movie I saw due to a recent death, regrettably. I've seen Milian in a few Italian movies of the past so that made me sad. At least this movie is worth seeing (don't be put off by its odd title), as I explain below: 

Not only was it time for me to continue my slow journey through the giallo genre (although I will try to pick that up soon) and to see a film from Italy, but unfortunately I had heard from a mutual on Letterboxd that Tomas Milian had passed away. While he appeared in things such as Traffic, JFK and Amistad, people who have seen old European genre cinema will be well familiar with the Spaghetti Westerns and Poliziotteschis he was in. I've seen that Cuban-born actor in a few Poliziotteschi films the past couple of years, so I was saddened by this piece of news. He did not appear in too many horror films but this was the right movie at the right time.

Anyhow, this movie with the unforgettable title (which actually does relate to something that happens in the film, believe it or not) revolves around a small southern Italian village where several boys-around 12 years old-are murdered. The players involve include a rather promiscuous woman named Patrizia (Barbara Bouchet; what a bizarre and creepy yet memorable first scene she had here), a newspaper reporter (Milian), more than one person who'd be called “mentally handicapped” in this day and age, and even a witch.

The movie doesn't always make a lot of sense. I'd say that's a Fulci trademark*-which it is-but that can also be said about plenty of old Italian horror. Even with that (or maybe because of that) I was pretty entertained by this, although it's definitely strange and greatly unsettling. It's not just the child murder aspect or the first scene with Bouchet that made my skin crawl. All that and the expected Fulci looniness... it's definitely a compelling watch, and there's plenty of misdirection. It has an unforgettable ending to boot and yes, this is where the trademark Fulci gore begins in his career, although what you see here is mild compared to what was to come.

Between what I said above and the film's comments about religion, this was quite the ride and an unforgettable experience. Don't let the title turn you off from checking this out. Bouchet and the way she looked and dressed throughout should be enough to appeal to some people... as it did to me.

* Really, what a madman he was. I mean that in the nicest way.

Thursday, March 23, 2017

The Gong Show Movie

The Gong Show Movie (1980)

Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Chuck Barris (RIP)

Starring: Chuck Barris, his girlfriend at the time (Robin Altman), various random people, including failed acts from The Gong Show

From: Universal, amazingly

I figured that with Chuck Barris just passing away, it was time for me to watch and review this. While I think this is a pretty bad film, it doesn't mean I have any problem with Barris as a human being. I talk about this at length below:

Believe it or not, I have actually seen this movie one before-many years ago-as in “before it officially came out on disc” (nevermind how I saw it). I got the Shout Factory Blu last year, but it wasn't until last night that I actually watched it. Honestly, I remembered the movie as not being too good. Regrettably, it was the death of Chuck Barris on Tuesday that finally inspired me to watch the Blu and see this for the first time in what may be around 10 years. Even though the star/director isn't even buried in the ground yet, I have to be honest here and say that I still think this is not too good. In fact, it was even worse than I remembered. I have no problem with Barris as a human being and I know he led an interesting life-I am not counting his alleged claims of his CIA days, either-so I won't let a bad film ruin my opinion of him.

Basically, this is Chuck Barris doing his version of 8 ½, only he is rather far from Fellini, to utter the understatement of the week. You follow him for a week as he doesn't enjoy his job due to hassles from network executives, people harassing him, people wanting to audition for the show anywhere, and other problems. I don't know about you guys, but for me it's not exactly easy to have sympathy for the problems of a successful producer and host of a popular show (even if the show was seen as “trash” by a lot of people) who the public only knew as a TV host of a weird and satirical program filled with bizarre human beings. You see that he has a statuesque and pretty girlfriend-Robin Altman, who he married around this time and almost 20 years later they divorced-and really, who cares about his problems, no matter how much of what you saw here was legit and how much of it was just made up in a (failed) attempt to be amusing.

I understand that he actually DID have various stresses going on at the time he made the movie (an odd moment of art imitating life) due to a controversial show he did called 3's A Crowd that was like The Newlywed Game, except that it was a man, his wife, and his secretary... even then that was seen as being gross to women so that caused a crapstorm. I imagine part of the reason this did not turn out well was that he had real life problems to deal with as he starred, directed, produced, and wrote this at least somewhat fictionalized look at his life... oh, and even contributed a few songs for the soundtrack to boot. Heck, I think The Gong Show may have gone off the air around the time that this was released and died a quick death at the box office. A major studio (Universal) released this, which is still amazing to me. Maybe it made sense at the time...

For a movie that was co-written by underground legend Robert Downey Sr., this was-except for a few chuckles-painfully bad and rarely funny, and more annoying than anything else. Also annoying to me was how this obviously was an excuse to see vulgar moments from The Gong Show (a few of those moments somehow made the air; the rest were edited out and never broadcast) and various bad auditions. I am not quite sure why the movie was even made. I mean, you can view various people that became famous later on (Rip Taylor, Danny Devito, Phil Hartman, Ed Marinaro, and even Vincent Schiavelli) but that's not enough of a reason for me to recommend this by any means.

Admittedly, I am too young to have seen the original Gong Show when it was on the air in the latter half of the 1970's. I have seen episodes of various revivals, and much to my surprise they are thinking of another revival for this summer. I don't think it'll work, as the original show was an absurdist product of its time and was best for the wacky 1970's. That's not even taking into account how you can't swing a dead cat around on the Internet without hitting upon strange human beings doing strange things. Look at YouTube... which I say is the best way to see clips of The Gong Show; it's preferable to watching this.

Anyway, even if I think this movie is quite the boondoggle, I am still saddened that Barris passed away. He lived to 87 and he got to do such things as write a popular song you still hear on the oldies stations (Palisades Park), created a cult hit in The Gong Show, and also created legendary game shows in both The Dating Game and The Newlywed Game. RIP to him.

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Confusion Na Wa

Confusion Na Wa (2013)

Runtime: 106 minutes


Directed by: Kenneth Gyang


Starring: Ramsey Noah, OC Ukeue, Ali Nuhu, Tunde Aladese, Gold Ikponmwosa


From: Cinema Kpatakpata


Here's something different from me, a Nigerian movie. Thankfully it's watchable and not bad. I just wish that some things would have been done differently... you'll see what I'm talking about below: 


In my life I have only seen a few movies from Africa. Thus, I figured I should see this film-which I spotted on Netflix Instant-and despite it being on Instant for everyone to see, at least judging by IMDb and this site, not too many people in the Western world have checked this out; it's unfortunate as it's fine. The title, it's based on the Fela Kuti song Confusion, which to me deserves a thumbs up.


The movie follows a group of characters in the span of a 24 hour period. Two disillusioned young men (both can be described as being a ne'er-do-well, and one of them does something very heinous & gross to a young woman) steal the phone of a sleazy guy and they attempt to blackmail him. That's the main plot; we follow other people and see that in the final act they are all connected to each other; it includes a guy who deals with the stresses of his corrupt job, a corrupt police force, a subplot straight out of Moonlight (except that homosexuality is still looked down unfavorably there, as I've heard for years now. Thankfully the movie itself doesn't look down upon homosexuality), people cheating on each other, and more. Thankfully there are a few characters around who at least have some morals.


The movie is definitely uneven and I wish there wouldn't have been that gross subplot, even if it was important for the third act; they should have done something else instead. That said, I can still rate this movie as fine. The general plot could have been done in any country but for me it was interesting to see life in Nigeria, whether it was what people wore, seeing what a decent-sized city there looks like, the music, the beliefs, etc. English is the main language in the country so the dialogue you hear here, it's mainly English with a movie of the local dialect known as Igbo. I only know that the “Nollywood” scene exists but I haven't even really seen clips of too many films from Nigeria so apperance-wise I can't do any comparisons but I can say it looks professional.


In addition, there is some rather amusing (if some rather vulgar) dialogue which made me laugh and there was more talk of The Lion King than I expected; the highlight there was a rather interesting theory of what that film was really all about. If you enjoy dark comedies and/or films where you follow disparate characters over a short amount of time that meet up with each other, this is worth a shot.

Monday, March 20, 2017

The Devil's Rain

The Devil's Rain (1975)

Runtime: 86 minutes

Directed by: Robert Fuest

Starring: Ernest Borgnine, Tom Skerritt, William Shatner, Eddie Albert, Keenan Wynn

From: Sandy Howard Productions

This is a film I had seen once before, but that was many years ago. I figured it was time to see this again. I can only rate it as average but at least it has a noteworthy ending. I talk about it below:

This is another movie where I saw it many years ago but hadn't seen it since. Saturday night was the time where I finally gave it a second spin. I remembered that aside from the memorable ending, the movie wasn't so hot. Well, I won't be that harsh this time, but aside from that gooey and melty ending (where they did milk it for all it was worth) the movie should have been better than it was.

The plot revolves around a centuries long battle over a special book which Satanist Ernest Borgnine wishes to acquire, so he could have a lot of power... or something like that. He and his cult do battle with one family, which manages to have Ida Lupino, Tom Skerritt, and William Shatner, who definitely delivers some of his Shatnerian acting skills; the cast has other famous faces, like Eddie Albert, Keenan Wynn and even a small role for John Travolta; it has to be said that it was on this set where he met an actress (I won't reveal her name) who introduced him to... Scientology. Dun dun dun... indeed. Speaking of cults, right?

The effects are nice and there are some creepy moments, but unfortunately despite the nice cast, a spooky setting of the rural American Southwest (actually filmed in Mexico) and some solid (unintentional) laughs-those that watch this, wait until you see what Borgnine turns into-it's not as scary or terrifying as you'd expect from the plot, and it falling right into the Satanic Panic of the 1970's and 1980's. There are better examples of this out there, although the movie is thankfully still watchable and I can't say it's bad... there are just a few slow stretches, that's all. Plus, this movie has another 70's staple... ESP.

While I wish the movie would be more noteworthy than just a gonzo ending, at least it's average.

Sunday, March 19, 2017

Planeta Bur

Planeta Bur (1962)


Runtime: 82 minutes

Directed by: Pavel Klushantsev

Starring: Vladimir Yemelyanov, Georgi Zhzhyonov, Gennadi Vernov, Yuriy Sarantsev, Georgiy Teykh, Kyunna Ignatova

From: Leningrad Popular Science Film Studio

This is a random Soviet sci-fi movie I watched on Friday night. It is a fine watch, thankfully. I talk about it below:  


I've known of this Soviet science fiction movie for a long while now, but I finally sat down and watched it last night. It can now be found on Amazon, where it can be rented for only a few bucks. There are also other places online where you can see it... whether you call it Planeta Bur, Planet of Storms, Planet of the Storms, Планета бурь or Planeta Burg (as it's called on Amazon), this movie is most noteworthy to the West as Roger Corman did one of his many tricks to stretch a dollar as far as it can go, and he used footage from this movie to make THREE films... Voyage to the Prehistoric Planet, Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women, and Queen of Blood.
This movie, the plot is that three spaceships heading to Venus suddenly becomes two after an incident involving an asteroid. This causes conflict. Those that have seen Prehistoric Planet, you know what sights are seen, as PP is an English dubbed version of this, except that they added some scenes of Basil Rathbone and the Russian woman in this was replaced with an American one. Various odd creatures are seen on a world that does look like some odd barren piece of Soviet land (as that's of course where it was filmed) but at least it does look somewhat otherworldly.
I will presume PP has greatly dumbed down dialogue and doesn't have such things as speculation of space travel by ancient civilizations, talk of aliens visiting centuries ago, life on other planets and evolution. Not only are there various adventures on Venus, but the one female character has to stay on the ship and there's a threat of jeopardy because she becomes overemotional about the rest of the crew on Venus because OF COURSE... that was only slightly more surprising than this having Communist propaganda. Somewhat surprisingly, the big wacky robot was actually named John in the original version, too.
The director (Pavel Klushantsev) is little known in the West but aside from the Alien franchise obviously being inspired by certain elements from this movie, people such as Spielberg and Lucas have noted the influence of his work on them. After all, Star Wars was not the first fictional property to have a land speeder. Sure, this movie is kitschy in that 60's sci-fi retro futurism way, but the effects do look good for the time and even with the sexism, it's still a charming flick.

Friday, March 17, 2017

From The Dark


Runtime: 90 minutes

Directed by: Conor McMahon

Starring: Niamh Algar, Stephen Cromwell, Ged Murray, Gerry O'Brien

From: Abandoned Films/Workshed Films

Yep, I watched an Irish movie today, as there was no better time than today to post a review of such a thing. Thankfully I can say this horror film was fine. I talk about the shamrockin' film below:

What better time to post a review of a fully Irish production, directed by a guy from Ireland and starring a female lead from The Emerald Isle? While I discovered what The Big Bad was beforehand (although it's made clear in the opening scene what it is, so that is no big deal) I otherwise did not know what I would think of this, and it was indeed possible I would give this a low score. I was thankful then that I can say this is fine.
The plot definitely sounds cliché: a young couple are driving in rural Ireland, and the guy is a total tool so he gets them lost and they get their car stuck. They have a real bad night as they deal with a creature; I won't reveal what that creature is except to say it's not a leprechaun.
The movies does some things right. Most of the effects are practical, which I definitely enjoy in this day and age. The creature is mainly hidden in the shadows or obscured. This is not done because it looks bad (rather, it looks decent) but for the effect of atmosphere. I wish that more low-budget horror did things like this so they don't look as cheap as they are, or use horrid CG that looks so fake it ruins your enjoyment. The quite small cast all does a fine job, especially Niamh Algar as our hero, Sarah. I was amused that she was the one who took charge while her boyfriend Mark was a real A-hole and also a buffoon. Sarah deserves a better boyfriend, one who doesn't always yell at her or cuss her out or constantly interrupt her. Anyhow, the movie also has a sort of gimmick and once it starts, the movie finds various ways to keep it interesting so you never become bored.
The film looks fine and there's an appropriate creepy musical score from Ray Harman. While there are some dopey moments, overall this was an enjoyable watch set in the rural Irish countryside and I presume it's not only notably better than a lot of the horror you find on Netflix Instant (where I watched this) but also better than some of the horror that's gotten wide release in the United States the past 6 months or so.

Thursday, March 16, 2017

Kong: Skull Island

Kong: Skull Island (2017)

79% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 256 reviews)

Runtime: 118 minutes

Directed by: Jordan Vogt-Roberts

Starring: Tom Hiddleston, Samuel L. Jackson, Brie Larson, John C. Reilly, John Goodman

From: Warner Bros/Legendary

I saw this movie late Tuesday afternoon; a small chain which has locations in the Orlando area had a discount day that day so I saw it on a giant screen for less than 10 bucks. It's not the 1933 classic but I was still pretty entertained. I talk all about it below:

When I first heard there was going to be another King Kong movie, I groaned. I often bemoan the lack of original ideas in Hollywood nowadays. Then, I saw the previews, saw they were doing their own thing and it would be part of a bigger picture, and I was suddenly more interested. While it has its flaws, it is still fun.

I won't say too much about the plot. After all, I kept myself in the dark about it and it wasn't until relatively recently that I even discovered it was set in the early 70's. A random group of people get together to investigate the newly discovered Skull Island, only to find out that King Kong (and other things) live there. There's also John C. Reilly with an epic beard, and a plot that was actually inspired by Apocalypse Now, believe it or not. The characters aren't always the most interesting or layered, but that's the modern Hollywood blockbuster for you; the same goes for the dialogue. That also goes for the mostly obvious early 70's song choices. They (the characters and the songs) were still fine; one character in particular, she really did not do much of anything and I presume there's alternate edits out or an extended edit where she does more.

The talented cast certainly does help. So do the very scenic locations, and all the destruction that happens during the action scenes. Kong not being as realistic as in the 2005 Peter Jackson movie is OK, as he does more destruction here, at least. The climatic battle was pretty great, at least to me. In addition, there are plenty of awesome moments (some of them involving Reilly) that will make for great gifs and images in the future. I enjoyed this movie, although I doubt that Hollywood will ever make a Kong that is a classic like the 1933 original.

I did find out some things about the movie before I went and saw it. There is an obvious homage to an infamous horror picture, and it's not something you'd ever expect in a big budget Hollywood film. I also knew about the scene after the end credits are completed, and what it contained. Even if I didn't... those end credits spoil it anyhow, which greatly amused me. The future will hopefully be promising, and I'll leave it at that. Choosing more out of left field indy directors who you wouldn't expect to helm something like this... that would be a swell idea.

Wednesday, March 15, 2017

The Suspect

The Suspect (Yong-Eui-Ja) (2013)

Runtime: 137 minutes

Directed by: Won Shin-Yun

Starring: Gong Yoo, Park Hee-Soon, Jo Sung-Ha, Yoo Da-In, Kim Sung-Kyun

From: Several South Korean companies

I saw this movie last night. I do not say as much about it below as I normally do. It's sadly a “meh” movie. I can say that it's the sort of thing that borrows a really dumb moment from Quantum of Solace involving parachutes. Need I say more?

As this will expire from Netflix Instant in a few days, this ended up being the South Korean movie I am watching this month. If only I would have enjoyed this more. Many people have compared this to a Jason Bourne movie; truth be told, as of now I still actually haven't SEEN a Jason Bourne movie. The whole “shaky-cam” thing of the Paul Greengrass ones have always turned me off. However, sometime later in the year, I plan on diving into the series and hopefully it's not something I regret doing. Sad to say, this movie also has shaky-cam, and I was not a fan of that. Hopefully the Bourne movies have better storytelling, where things aren't so muddled or confused.

The plot: a special agent from North Korea (Ji) defects to the South; that naturally get the North upset. Plus, Ji is hunting down those who did great harm to his immediate family. There's more but that's the gist. While there's plenty of action to be seen, the way that it's shot is a real downer for me as that made it less enjoyable. I already griped about the storytelling... while there are still exciting moments and even moments that made me laugh, overall I am meh about this. I was hoping for better, even though I had heard mixed things about this from here and elsewhere.

I'd normally have more to say but I think I summed things up pretty well so I'll leave it at that. I enjoy movies from South Korea in general but of course they also have movies that I feel let down by.

Monday, March 13, 2017

Nightlight

Nightlight (2015)

Runtime: 85 minutes

Directed by: Scott Beck/Bryan Woods

Starring: Shelby Young, Carter Jenkins, Chloe Bridges, Taylor Murphy, Mitch Hewer

From: Herrick Entertainment

Would you believe that this movie is from the perspective of a FLASHLIGHT? Yes, it's found footage, but what a twist. It's also not terrible, although I can't even say it's good, which is a shame. I explain all that below:

Late April of 2015, I read an article on a horror website where this movie was mentioned as being released in a few AMC Theatres, none of which were near me. What was said about the movie made me chortle, and as I read more about it, it was true... this is yet another found footage movie set in the woods, although this is different... this was not a movie where we are seeing film recorded by someone with a camera. No, it was a POV movie... from the perspective of a flashlight. I kid you not. Amazing, although it does explain the common found footage complaint of “why is that person still filming?”

The plot isn't too original: a “not cool” teenage girl (Robin) is invited to hang out with a quartet of asstagonists (i.e. alleged protagonists who are actually A-holes) in the woods, where they say that they play “flashlight games”. No, I had no idea what the F that was either. Turns out, it means that they dick around in the woods and act like a bunch of tools. Well, spooky things start happening. It has to be said that Robin knew someone (Ethan) who killed themselves in those very same woods... is it a wise idea to go there?

I wish this movie could have been better, as the general idea was fine-and once you know what it's all about, it's actually a downbeat and sad tale-but it was the execution that was lacking. There actually are some creepy moments throughout; regrettably, it does fall into cliché too often. The Blair Witch Project was an obvious inspiration, to boot. Sure, Robin wants to be “cool” and that means hanging out with massive tools, but that is part of the story... although it can be tough putting up with those A-holes. I was at least amused at how the flashlight managed to switch between different people and that's how we got to see as much as we did.

It's disappointing this isn't something I can recommend, as in practice it's better than all the dreck that populates the found footage genre. It looks fine and I can't complain about the young cast of mostly unfamiliar faces. The plot should have been done differently and better and not be vague at all the wrong moments... and the movie would be more than just something with a wacky gimmick.

Saturday, March 11, 2017

Hell's Ground

Hell's Ground (Zibahkhana) (2007)

Runtime: 77 minutes

Directed by: Omar Khan

Starring: Kunwar Ali Roshon, Rooshanie Ejaz, Rubya Chaudhry, Haider Raza, Osman Khalid Butt

From: Bubonic Films/Mondo Macabro

Would you believe that this is a gory horror flick from Pakistan? Would you also believe it's pretty entertaining for what it is? I talk all about it below: 

This is a film I heard about in 2007 (it played at a few United States film festivals; after all, the first gory horror flick from Pakistan will naturally get attention) but completely forgot about until I stumbled across it yesterday and as it can be rented from Amazon Video (albeit, the print doesn't look too good), it was something I had to spend a few bucks on immediately.

I heard this compared to The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, and that is fair as that was a big inspiration. However, other films also inspired, from Romero zombie movies to Jason Voorhees. One character even has the classic poster of the William Lustig Maniac hanging in his bedroom. The story, it's not exactly original: a quintet of teenagers lie to their parents in various ways so they can get in a crappy old van and travel to a rock concert. They take a wrong turn, and... they have to deal with more than one calamity. Not only is pollution rearing its ugly head, but there's a killer who wears a unique getup and wields a pretty great weapon... which at least as of now is revealed by the poster on the movie's page here at Letterboxd. It certainly is distinctive.

As I said already, the movie is pretty gory at times, so those of you that love such things should enjoy seeing that. Things are cliché (there are stock characters, including “the bitch”; in addition, marijuana is smoked; that makes this feel like something from the 70's or 80's... which works for me. While it does seem derivative, I was still entertained so I can't complain. Plus, for a nerd like me it was interesting to see life in Pakistan... from how the cities to the countryside looked, the music, the food, etc. Plus, I learned that English is commonly spoken there and it is common for people to switch between their native language (such as Urdu) to English and back. I know precious little about the country, despite the fact that it has almost 200 million people. Thus, while this doesn't have too many surprising moments, I was still entertained. The fact that this was decently made and the setting of being in the woods at night is naturally spooky, that helps also.

For those that have seen the infamous 60's cult film known in the West as Dracula in Pakistan, the star of that (Rehan) has a cameo appearance here, which was a nice thing to do. While the setting is the big draw here, for those that dig The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and/or 70's to early 80's horror, there's a decent chance you'll dig this too.

Friday, March 10, 2017

The Vampire's Coffin

The Vampire's Coffin (El Ataud Del Vampiro) (1958)

Runtime: 81 minutes

Directed by: Fernando Mendez

Starring: Abel Salazar, Ariadna Welter, German Robles, Yerye Beirute, Alicia Montoya

From: Cinematografica ABSA

Here is a random Mexican horror film which is on Netflix Instant. It's thankfully fine. I explain why below: 

This is a motion picture I only recently discovered was on Netflix Instant, and as they now rarely have movies that are this old or older, I figured I should give it a whirl, and I do say it's worth seeing. I do wish that I could see the film known in Spanish as El Vampiro (The Vampire) and this film is a sequel to that and two of the main characters of Vampiro reprise their roles here... as that can't be found on Netflix nor the other streaming sites... I am SOL there. It's OK with me, as there are reviews on the Interwebs which explain the plot of The Vampire. Basically, it's set at a rural home where a doctor named Enrique meets up with a young lady named Marta and her family house happens to be right next to a vampire. Don't you hate it when that happens?

In this movie, you see that the climax of Vampiro must have involved having a stake driven through his heart and being placed in a coffin, as that is where you see him in the very beginning; his grave is actually robbed. It's done by another doctor, who wants to research the corpse for SCIENCE. Well, the stake is removed, and you can figure out what happens next. Vampiro goes after Marta as Enrique tries to protect her, and hypnotism is involved. That is fairly standard as it comes to the vampire mythos. I am not sure about how Vampiro can disappear and reappear at will.

The movie is on the silly side. After all, the strings are easily seen whenever a bat flies around, and multiple gunshots are fired in a hospital room and no one else hears it. Yes, like in Halloween II a decent amount of the movie takes place at a seemingly almost abandoned hospital. Other settings include a graveyard and a wax museum which so happens to have a macabre display up. I can still say the movie is fine, partly because it does set up atmosphere and mood with its settings.

It is also decently directed and the cast does a swell job, especially German Robles as Vampiro, who is appropriate as a suave yet menacing character, which is perfect for that role. Thankfully the movie is watchable and while it is cheesy, it should still be acceptable for fans of vampire pictures.

Thursday, March 9, 2017

Pirates Of The Caribbean: Curse Of The Black Pearl

Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Runtime: 143 minutes

Directed by: Gore Verbinski

Starring: Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Geoffrey Rush, Jack Davenport

From: Walt Disney

It was about time I saw one of these movies so I could review them here; the only review until now was for the mediocre 4th film. While all the sequels to this original were mediocre at best, at least this is still cool. I talk about it below: 

It's been almost 10 years since I had seen any of the first three Pirates movies; the first one is cool but the second and fourth are meh and the third one... atrocious; wait until I review that one. I don't even know if I'll see the new one on the big screen; nothing about it I have seen so far makes me give even a sliver of a damn about it.

I imagine everyone by now is familiar with the plot, revolving around undead pirates who wish to find one last gold piece so they can become human again, so I won't dwell on that. I will mention that Elizabeth Swann was a stronger woman character (not just a damsel in distress) than I remembered, which seems somewhat appropriate considering I watched this yesterday, which was International Women's Day. Personally, I understand why Will Turner would steal a ship to rescue her... I would steal a lot of things to try and rescue Keira Knightley, personally.

The movie is a fun adventure in scenic locations with a cast that does a nice job, but naturally it is Captain Jack Sparrow and his eccentric manner which is the most memorable aspect of the film. I imagine that even today there are plenty of people who swoon over the character, although probably not as many as in the past, due to those revelations that he may possibly not be a great human being. The character is still a blast, a version of Keith Richards from a few centuries ago. The contributions of Geoffrey Rush in particular were appreciated, but it was Captain Jack who will forever be unforgettable.

Unfortunately, aside from various story nitpicks, there are a few too many goofy moments and in what I did not know at the time was a harbinger of things to come, there was a plot twist or two too many and things start to become overly convoluted... those two things ruined the second and especially the third movie, and it started here. But, it doesn't really ruin the movie. I can still say it's a rollickin' good time, with the expected moments that are in the Pirates theme park ride at all the Disney parks, and a memorable score from Klaus Badelt. If only the other movies in the franchise could have been as fun as this was...

Another Update

I just wanted to say that the only movies I've seen since Monday were a rewatch of Lake Mungo (my opinion hasn't changed; I am still "meh" about it) and a film I'll review a little later.

Monday, March 6, 2017

Belladonna of Sadness

Belladonna of Sadness (Kanashimi No Beradonna) (1973)

Runtime: 93 minutes

Directed by: Eiichi Yamamoto

Starring: This is another animated film, this time from Japan

From: Mushi; yes, that's what that animated studio was called

What a double bill this was late Saturday night on TCM Underground. As odd as Fantastic Planet was, this was all the more odder. Wait until you read the details below: 

I was able to see this movie late Saturday night courtesy of TCM Underground; I heard all about it since it was remastered last year but this was finally the opportunity for me to check it out; wow, what a film it was. I certainly wasn't expecting something so erotic and sensual... not to mention full of phallic imagery, or all the genitalia-related imagery in general.

This animated movie (where the images usually look like watercolor paintings; at times it seems like 255 million colors are being used at the same time) details how a town in olden times was ruled by a despot king who was an awful human being. It follows a young couple, where the woman has something very heinous happen to hear and in a moment of weakness, the Devil arrives. He agrees to help her, but of course there's a price to be paid...

What a wild psychedelic freak-out of a movie this is. All those crazy images, bright flashing colors, to the jazz-rock soundtrack that veers into prog rock at times (this was done by Masahiko Sato), it's definitely better seen than described. There are several long bits where it's just the soundtrack and outrageous visuals. I won't spoil the ending but you do find out why the setting appears to be a few hundred years ago. It really comes out of nowhere, unless I don't know much about that real life setting and witchcraft/selling your soul to Satan was a part of that uprising...

No matter, this is a rather unorthodox look at a woman being empowered; I wouldn't be surprised if some women don't enjoy the female lead here, for a variety of reasons. Me, I dug this weird, surreal provocative journey, a product of its time, both good and bad.

Sunday, March 5, 2017

Fantastic Planet

Fantastic Planet (La Planete Sauvage) (1973)

Runtime: 72 minutes

Directed by: Rene Laloux

Starring: This is an animated movie

From: Several different companies in both France and Czechoslovakia

I am glad that TCM Underground is a thing. They show the oddest cult movies; while I enjoy watching regular TCM too, it's nice to see such oddities once in awhile. This is a famed European animated film that is quite odd, yet quite engrossing at the same time. I explain why below: 

Late last night, TCM Underground debuted both this and Belladonna of Sadness; what a psychotronic double-header that was, two weird and wild animated 70's films from foreign countries. As I had not seen either of them and this month is all about foreign movies, this was perfect for me. The next day I'll talk about Belladonna. For now, I discuss this French/Czechoslovakian co-production, based on a French book by Stefan Wul.

The plot is set in the future; weird giant blue humanoid aliens known as Draags who are A-holes (I will presume that James Cameron had seen this movie a long time ago; at least he knew to change things around where the influence wasn't so obvious) have taken human beings from Earth to their strange world and call them Oms. It's a tale where a young human being lucks out and gains enough knowledge to try and lead an uprising against those blue A-holes. This movie is animated but it's NOT for kids; there are some horrifying moments and then there's all the topless women...

The animation was not only stop-motion, it was the version of stop-motion known as cutout. It provides a distinctive look and as the alien world has plenty of bizarre sights, the movie is always a treat to look at. It's not a vibrant and colorful world but its austere nature is fitting for how the Draags act. The story is not revolutionary yet it's always compelling as it's classic tropes seeing someone who is oppressed try to stop the oppressors. There are definitely allusions to real life struggles from the past between different groups of people. It's definitely a product of its time, from how there's likely a Czechoslovakian statement against Soviet Union occupation and its bitchin' 70's funky/jazzy score from Alain Goraguer. Yet, it doesn't feel dated and it still feels relevant today.

I am glad I finally saw this movie, in other words. In several ways it was a great fit to be watched in conjunction with Belladonna of Sadness. It does make me wish for more adult animation that is actually intelligent and not crude or stupid or engaging in anti-humor.

Saturday, March 4, 2017

The Silent House

The Silent House (La Casa Muda) (2010)

Runtime: 86 minutes

Directed by: Gustavo Hernandez

Starring: Florencia Colucci, Abel Tripaldi, Gustavo Alonzo

From: Tokio Films

No, this is not the 2011 American remake (Silent House) with Elizabeth Olsen, which in general went over like a fart in church. I hope that isn't actually worse than the original (from Uruguay) as The Silent House isn't too good, as I explained below: 

I enjoy this one month out of a year gimmick where people watch foreign films. It's fun to (unofficially) participate and it's always interesting for me to see flicks from unfamiliar places. It's not rare for me to see something from the UK or Far East Asia or Italy... it's entirely different to see pictures from places like North Korea, Senegal, Tajikistan, Bahrain, Uganda, or Israel. In this case, I haven't ever seen anything from Uruguay before; the remake has not been seen by me either... I just know that most people hate it. Then again, this movie has never been that popular either...
Using a shot in one take gimmick (but it's faux a la Birdman)-much to its detriment-a young woman is with her dad and they are spending the night in an abandoned house in the middle of nowhere so they can start renovating the next morning... only for things to go wrong and the young woman-Laura-to be in a lot of trouble.
Personally, I thought the one take gimmick did not work for this movie, like at all. The fact that the movie is hardly horrifying or even slightly chilling aside from a few moment is a big problem, but so is the real time gimmick. It results in plenty of boring moments where Laura wanders around the house with a lantern... even though you see later there's still enough light outside where it's not night time. Maybe the windows were boarded shut, I don't know... if it would have been scary that thought wouldn't even be in my mind, or if we knew much of anything about the few characters that are in the movie. What we get instead are long stretches that even Ti West may find to be boring as s---.
On another site, I saw a review which made me laugh; the reviewer was somehow befuddled by the plot. While things aren't spoonfed to you, once you piece together what's going on, it's not hard to figure out at all. The fact that this was someone reviewing it for a site that people in general know (comingsoon.net) makes it all the more hilarious to me. The general idea of the plot was not bad to me and the big twist in the plot was not a big issue to me either; like I said, a lot of it being boring and not so scary and the characters being total blank slates are the big issues.
I wish I could have liked this movie more; after all, the cast tries their best with what they had to work with and if done in a different way it could have been pretty cool. As the remake keeps the shot in one take gimmick, I will presume it's as not good as most people say it is. Hopefully one day I'll see a movie from Uruguay that I think is at least passable.

Friday, March 3, 2017

[Rec] Is Still Pretty Cool

That's what I saw last night, and I am glad I still enjoy that film. That is all.

Southern Comfort

Southern Comfort (1981)

Runtime: 106 minutes

Directed by: Walter Hill

Starring: Keith Carradine, Powers Boothe, Fred Ward, Franklyn Seales, T.K. Carter

From: Cinema Group Ventures

I figured it was about time I saw this movie and reviewed it here. It's not my favorite Walter Hill movie, but it doesn't mean I didn't like it. I talk all about it below: 

During March, I won't always be watching foreign films; sometimes I'll see ones from America. I stumbled across this and I figured it was time to give this a whirl.

The plot doesn't sound too complex on the surface: in 1973 Louisiana, a group of people in the National Guard go out in the swamp for a routine training exercise... which quickly become out of the ordinary when they “borrow” something from a group of Cajuns and the Cajuns are very unhappy. As they have real guns and the part-time National Guard soldiers mostly has blanks and they can't get along with each other... it's a bad situation. It's not laissez les bon temps roulez for them, in other words.

The movie is not just watching the Cajuns on the hunt; it's seeing how our protagonists interact with each other and deal with this crises; needless to say some handle it rather badly and there's plenty of conflict. Thankfully the Cajuns aren't always on the attack; it builds suspense as you usually look around when you can (while the actors are emoting or are in a critical scene) to see if they are hiding in the background waiting to strike. While there are some uneven moments overall this is a compelling moment with some quality kills. A talented cast (such as Keith Carradine, Powers Boothe, Fred Ward, and others) is a nice asset, as is a great ending.

Thankfully, the movie does capture the feel of Creole country, the unique feeling and aesthetic of Cajun culture, and not just because it was filmed in Louisiana and Texas. From what people say here, it's actually an accurate look at how those people live and act... well, aside from them being murderers at a slight provocation. The music from Ry Cooder is note-perfect to nailing that aesthetic and there are moments where you hear some great Cajun and Creole music from some authentic artists. It does factor into the great ending. Whether or not it's a parable about the Vietnam War (the year it's set in, I do say that it is), it is a movie worth seeing.

Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Two Notes

First, Bill Paxton passing away suddenly is pretty awful; I've seen plenty of his movies so that sucks. I rewatched Next of Kin for Letterboxd; Paxton's role is small in that but no matter how big the part, he always delivered. Secondly, LOL Oscars. I can't believe they screwed up the Best Picture announcement and also made two acting legends look so bad. A shame. Moonlight is pretty awesome so I am glad it won in an upset.

Force Majeure

Force Majeure (Turist) (2014)

Runtime: 120 minutes

Directed by: Ruben Ostlund

Starring: Johannes Kuhnke, Lisa Loven Kongsli, Clara Wettergren, Vincent Wettergren, Kristofer Hivju

From: Several Different European Companies

March is the month of foreign movie watching on Letterboxd; it won't be all I watch this month but it will be the majority of films. I picked this one to watch first as it has high marks. Despite an ending that was iffy to me, I still enjoyed this picture, which does have some awfully purdy scenery. I talk about this Swedish/French/Norwegian/Danish movie below:

As I've done since I first joined (Letterboxd) in 2013, whenever this theme month comes around, I don't officially participate but I still watch random films from across the world. I decided this was the time to finally see this much-ballyhooed movie. Before I talk about it, let me clarify that its English title means, to paraphrase, “an extraordinary event happens and because of it, both parties are free from a contract as they can't fulfill their obligations.”

Man, this was not the easiest movie to watch. A normal family (the parents, and two young children) are on vacation at a ski resort. They are outside eating at a restaurant when a controlled avalanche happens, but it doesn't look all that controlled. The dad decides to leave his children and wife in the dust; the wife is REAL unhappy about it. From there, there is no shortage of awkwardness and simmering anger as a marriage falls apart... although you can assume that the marriage likely had its troubles before then.

I've heard this describe as a comedy and there are some darkly humorous moments. Personally, I say that this is a rather uneasy look at a relationship unraveling; all of us have experienced it in some way during our lives and it's never a fun experience. If seeing how it affects their friends is bad enough, far worse is seeing the impact it has on their children; I thankfully have parents who-while they have their standard arguments-have been married since before I was born. I can only imagine how this plays for those who had parents that divorced as kids.

The ending, I am not quite so sure about or what messages it was trying to say. Even then, I can give this high marks. There are some tremendous scenes and I appreciated how the directing was restrained and thus we got plenty of long scenes and lengthy takes; I appreciate such things when in this modern time most of what we get is cameras swooping around and too quick editing. I know that there are plans for an American remake (because of course) and I know it won't be shot the same and I will presume it will be inferior to this. Anyhow, the cast does a swell job-even the little kids-and I am glad this first movie in a month where I will be watching plenty of foreign films was well worth seeing.