Grunt! The Wrestling Movie (1985)
Runtime: 90 minutes
Directed by: Allan Holzman
Starring: Greg “Magic” Schwarz (yes, that’s his name), Steven Cepello, Marilyn Dodds Frank, Jeff Dial
From: New World Pictures
Now, here’s something interesting for Memorial Day. It’s a movie that I got on VHS tape when I was a kid. My dad got it for a dollar (he over-paid) at a store as he knew I was a huge pro wrestling fan at the time. I watched it, and even back in those days when I enjoyed watching feces, I thought this was awful. I then didn’t watch it again for many years, until finally today. I wanted to see if it was as bad as I remembered it being.
So, here’s how this lame cash-in on the then-popular WWF turned out. It’s a faux-documentary about an old wrestler named Mad Dog who wrestled for the title in ’79 but ran into trouble when he accidentally decapitated his World Champion opponent (!). He gets into trouble for that, falls into a depression, then allegedly kills himself. But, six years later, the title is finally stripped from the dead champion (yes, that’s the type of “humor” you have in this movie) and it’s going to be up for stakes in a battle royal. A new wrestler creatively called The Mask arrives on the scene, and the director (Dial) and a weasel fan club president-really-want to find out if The Mask is Mad Dog or not.
Who cares?!
That’s my reaction to the whole thing. It’s like Spinal Tap, only the complete opposite in terms of droll humor. Here, “jokes” are made about arm transplants to get rid of tattoos, or the director being named Leslie Uggams… no, not that Leslie Uggams, he says often. The real Uggams is an African-American singer/actress from back in the day. Like I said, that’s the type of comedy you get in this movie. It’s an idea for a short that is brutally stretched out to an hour and a half. You get to see some old wrestlers that hardcore fans would know, like Dick Murdoch, Adrian Street, Dan Spivey, John Tolos, and some local wrestlers from the dying days of the Los Angeles wrestling scene. Plus…
The movie has Wally George appearing as himself briefly. Think Rush Limbaugh… or maybe better yet, Glenn Beck in terms of schtick. He apparently had plants on and he’d rant and rave about liberals and Soviets and all that. See what I mean about Glenn Beck? The studio audience was Springer-ish, too. Bizarrely, he was the father of Rebecca De Mornay! True story. If Fox News would have been around back then… he’d be a big star. I guess we should be happy then that it wasn’t. And yet he was the best actor in this film! Trust me, much of the “acting” you see is rather poor.
So, the wrestling action you get to see (to pad out the run time) is fine, I suppose for the time period, but the stuff besides that is mainly awful and a total fail when it comes to being funny, so it’s not worth watching unless you are a hardcore fan and you wish to see those old faces or laugh ironically at it 26 years after it came out, especially at the 80’s-riffing tunes you get to hear throughout. If you do that, I’ll presume you won’t enjoy how you often get the message from the movie that pro wrestling sucks and that some of the people involved with it hate pro wrestling. What a message pro wrestling fans want to receive, right?
I'll be back Friday night.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
The Nomi Song
The Nomi Song (2004)
Runtime: 98 minutes
Directed by: Andrew Horn
Starring: Klaus Nomi
From: Arte
Here’s a documentary that while not a part of The Criterion Collection I still was able to watch via Hulu Plus. It’s all about a rather strange yet intriguing character from the late 70’s and early 80’s, but before I get to talking about Klaus Nomi and the film, I have to mention that I first heard about it in ’04 when I went to a now defunct small-time theatre in Orlando (really, a room attached to a bar that had a projection screen) to see something else and I overheard the bartender there talking to another customer about this movie. But, I had never heard of Nomi before and as this was back before YouTube, I didn’t bother trying to find out more about him.
Then, a few years later, back when I had HDNet, I watched Urgh! A Music War, a cult music film filled with performances by many punk, reggae, and new wave bands of the time. Nomi performed there and I was captivated by the sight of a man wearing a black and white quasi tuxedo outfit with strange hair and white makeup with black lips. Besides his rather strange look, he happened to have a wide vocal range and could sing high-pitched like an opera singer. After watching that, I now wish I had seen that documentary. Now, thanks to Hulu, I finally was able to.
The film explained how the guy born as Klaus Sperber immigrated to New York and did various things there while starting up a musical career. He sang backup to David Bowie when he appeared on Saturday Night Live in ’79 and he did rather elaborate performances around New York after that until he became one of the first people of some renown to acquire AIDS and die due to complications of it back in ’83. When he did perform the songs were quite the odd blend of opera songs that matched his range, some original tunes, and covers that ranged from 60’s pop to Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead. As you can see, a one of a kind character.
As an aside, if you watch some videos of his songs on YouTube, you’ll see people comparing him to Lady Gaga, of all people. Me, I’ve always thought that some of her tunes were cool (especially considering that otherwise, a lot of Top 40 the past oh, 5 or 6 years, is pretty rancid; however, her last few singles sounding like rip-offs of earlier pop songs… not cool) but her entire persona… God-awful! Talk about forcing it and trying way too hard. Yet, of course a lot of people find it “fascinating” and “awesome” when I just roll my eyes at her stupid attempts at getting controversy, from meat dresses to whatever else she does that’s pure nonsense. In contrast, what Nomi did never came across as forced or trying too hard. Strange, yeah, but not attention-whore sort of fame-grabbing that you always get from the girl who lovingly calls her fans “little monsters”. Between the two, I’m choosing the German, for sure.
Anyhow, the documentary does a real nice job of explaining his life story and show how he went from a young German in Germany to a cult figure in the underground New York scene through interviews with people he knew, archival interviews with Klaus himself, and archival interviews with his family. And of course, there's old performances of him in the small clubs that you can watch. He didn’t hit it big right after he made it to New York, but once he did, he became a bizarre and memorable figure that even today is a well-known cult figure.
If the character and the movie sounds interesting to you, I recommend tracking it down. I'll be back on Memorial Day night, where I may review a movie that recently was released on the big screen.
Runtime: 98 minutes
Directed by: Andrew Horn
Starring: Klaus Nomi
From: Arte
Here’s a documentary that while not a part of The Criterion Collection I still was able to watch via Hulu Plus. It’s all about a rather strange yet intriguing character from the late 70’s and early 80’s, but before I get to talking about Klaus Nomi and the film, I have to mention that I first heard about it in ’04 when I went to a now defunct small-time theatre in Orlando (really, a room attached to a bar that had a projection screen) to see something else and I overheard the bartender there talking to another customer about this movie. But, I had never heard of Nomi before and as this was back before YouTube, I didn’t bother trying to find out more about him.
Then, a few years later, back when I had HDNet, I watched Urgh! A Music War, a cult music film filled with performances by many punk, reggae, and new wave bands of the time. Nomi performed there and I was captivated by the sight of a man wearing a black and white quasi tuxedo outfit with strange hair and white makeup with black lips. Besides his rather strange look, he happened to have a wide vocal range and could sing high-pitched like an opera singer. After watching that, I now wish I had seen that documentary. Now, thanks to Hulu, I finally was able to.
The film explained how the guy born as Klaus Sperber immigrated to New York and did various things there while starting up a musical career. He sang backup to David Bowie when he appeared on Saturday Night Live in ’79 and he did rather elaborate performances around New York after that until he became one of the first people of some renown to acquire AIDS and die due to complications of it back in ’83. When he did perform the songs were quite the odd blend of opera songs that matched his range, some original tunes, and covers that ranged from 60’s pop to Ding Dong The Witch Is Dead. As you can see, a one of a kind character.
As an aside, if you watch some videos of his songs on YouTube, you’ll see people comparing him to Lady Gaga, of all people. Me, I’ve always thought that some of her tunes were cool (especially considering that otherwise, a lot of Top 40 the past oh, 5 or 6 years, is pretty rancid; however, her last few singles sounding like rip-offs of earlier pop songs… not cool) but her entire persona… God-awful! Talk about forcing it and trying way too hard. Yet, of course a lot of people find it “fascinating” and “awesome” when I just roll my eyes at her stupid attempts at getting controversy, from meat dresses to whatever else she does that’s pure nonsense. In contrast, what Nomi did never came across as forced or trying too hard. Strange, yeah, but not attention-whore sort of fame-grabbing that you always get from the girl who lovingly calls her fans “little monsters”. Between the two, I’m choosing the German, for sure.
Anyhow, the documentary does a real nice job of explaining his life story and show how he went from a young German in Germany to a cult figure in the underground New York scene through interviews with people he knew, archival interviews with Klaus himself, and archival interviews with his family. And of course, there's old performances of him in the small clubs that you can watch. He didn’t hit it big right after he made it to New York, but once he did, he became a bizarre and memorable figure that even today is a well-known cult figure.
If the character and the movie sounds interesting to you, I recommend tracking it down. I'll be back on Memorial Day night, where I may review a movie that recently was released on the big screen.
Monday, May 23, 2011
House
House (Hausu) (1977)
Runtime: 88 minutes
Directed by: Nobuhiko Obayashi
Starring: Kimiko Ikegami, Miki Jinbo, Kumiko Oba, Ai Matubara
From: Toho
So, I finally watched a movie on Hulu Plus and saw a movie put up by Criterion, which you can buy on DVD and Blu-Ray as it was a release by them last fall. I was looking around for stuff to watch and there’s some titles by them that I wish they would put up on Hulu (mainly some foreign crime dramas) but they haven’t yet. So, I went with this film, which I’ve wanted to see for awhile now, as from clips I’ve seen online it looked like one of the strangest movies of all time, no lie. I know I’ve mentioned it before, but there’s a great videostore in my old college town of Normal, Illinois known as The Movie Fan where you could get an incredible-and liberal-selection of films and I saw some odd ones there, either by myself or with a group of several people in various combinations. In fact, some people and I used to call the strangest movies as “Movie Fan Movies”, something I’ll never forget.
Well, after I saw this film, this is definitely a Movie Fan Movie.
It’s hard to describe this movie as not only is it hard to do, but it’d spoil a lot of just what is so damn strange about this. But, in short, it revolves around a group of seven young Japanese women (with names such as Gorgeous, Kung-Fu, and Melody) who go to the house of the aunt of Gorgeous, due to reasons I won’t get into. It’s a big old mansion and soon after they arrive, strange things start happening…
Well, I’ve seen clips of this before online and it’s total WTF stuff. I then saw the whole movie and really, everything about it is strange! Really, from the very beginning it's so avant-garde and not a minute goes by where you won't see something that is just out of the ordinary.
From the way it was filmed to the sets, the music and the special effects and the rest, it is just bizarre all the way through and it’s definitely watchable, just to see what happens next, as likely you won’t be able to predict most of what happens. I figuratively sat there, mouth a-gape at all the peculiar sights I was seeing. It’s thus rather difficult for me to review but I’ll say that if you want to watch something that will be unlike most movies you’ve ever seen, then it’s worth tracking down, even if to laugh in disbelief at all the deliberately cartoony effects and shots, or wondering why and how this film ever got made by a major Japanese studio. It’s perfect to watch if you do drugs, are on drugs… or want to know what it’s like to ingest something like shrooms or acid. I’ve never done that sort of thing before, so now I know what it’s like to see killer pianos or dangerous bananas.
I’ll be back Thursday night.
Runtime: 88 minutes
Directed by: Nobuhiko Obayashi
Starring: Kimiko Ikegami, Miki Jinbo, Kumiko Oba, Ai Matubara
From: Toho
So, I finally watched a movie on Hulu Plus and saw a movie put up by Criterion, which you can buy on DVD and Blu-Ray as it was a release by them last fall. I was looking around for stuff to watch and there’s some titles by them that I wish they would put up on Hulu (mainly some foreign crime dramas) but they haven’t yet. So, I went with this film, which I’ve wanted to see for awhile now, as from clips I’ve seen online it looked like one of the strangest movies of all time, no lie. I know I’ve mentioned it before, but there’s a great videostore in my old college town of Normal, Illinois known as The Movie Fan where you could get an incredible-and liberal-selection of films and I saw some odd ones there, either by myself or with a group of several people in various combinations. In fact, some people and I used to call the strangest movies as “Movie Fan Movies”, something I’ll never forget.
Well, after I saw this film, this is definitely a Movie Fan Movie.
It’s hard to describe this movie as not only is it hard to do, but it’d spoil a lot of just what is so damn strange about this. But, in short, it revolves around a group of seven young Japanese women (with names such as Gorgeous, Kung-Fu, and Melody) who go to the house of the aunt of Gorgeous, due to reasons I won’t get into. It’s a big old mansion and soon after they arrive, strange things start happening…
Well, I’ve seen clips of this before online and it’s total WTF stuff. I then saw the whole movie and really, everything about it is strange! Really, from the very beginning it's so avant-garde and not a minute goes by where you won't see something that is just out of the ordinary.
From the way it was filmed to the sets, the music and the special effects and the rest, it is just bizarre all the way through and it’s definitely watchable, just to see what happens next, as likely you won’t be able to predict most of what happens. I figuratively sat there, mouth a-gape at all the peculiar sights I was seeing. It’s thus rather difficult for me to review but I’ll say that if you want to watch something that will be unlike most movies you’ve ever seen, then it’s worth tracking down, even if to laugh in disbelief at all the deliberately cartoony effects and shots, or wondering why and how this film ever got made by a major Japanese studio. It’s perfect to watch if you do drugs, are on drugs… or want to know what it’s like to ingest something like shrooms or acid. I’ve never done that sort of thing before, so now I know what it’s like to see killer pianos or dangerous bananas.
I’ll be back Thursday night.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
It’s Still Friday Night In Hawaii…
Well, today has been even more hectic than I expected. I’ve been catching up on Twitter and of course I am super-bummed about the news concerning Macho Man Randy Savage, so this was placed on the back-burner until now. I’ll quickly mention a few movies I saw, and that’s about all I feel like doing right now. It is the movies I watched on Sunday and Monday that I haven’t discussed yet.
The first one I saw was Rolling Thunder, a film beloved by people as diverse as Gene Siskel and Tarantino, and yet for reasons unknown by me, it’s never officially come out on DVD. Sure, you can order it on demand from MGM, but it’s just not the same as buying a big special edition of the film in a brick and mortar store. It’s quite the entertaining yet still heartbreaking tale of an obviously damaged Vietnam vet who goes on the warpath against an exceptionally sweaty James Best-far away from his Dukes of Hazzard character-and his buddies for their killing of his family. It’s worth seeing and when you do see violence… it’s quality. Seeing it on MGMHD is the best way to see it.
The second movie was Foxy Brown. It’s similar to Coffy, although I prefer Coffy to this by a small margin. It’s still a fun movie that has such oddities as some of the acting from Antonio Fargas, a tremendous fight scene involving the denizens of a lesbian bar (!) and the main villain being a woman. And, not too surprisingly, it is filled with nudity.
Finally, there’s Leviathan, one of the many underwater movies from ’89 with a quality cast (including Richard Crenna, Daniel Stern, Peter Weller, Amanda Pays, and Ernie Hudson) and a story that is quite derivative of such films as The Thing and (quite clearly) Alien anhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifd yet it’s enjoyable to watch. If yhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifou want a detailed recap (including spoilers) of the film that’s better than anything I can punch up, read the second half of this column. Hey, it's a film where tainted vodka plays an important part in the plot!
I’ll be back Monday night.
The first one I saw was Rolling Thunder, a film beloved by people as diverse as Gene Siskel and Tarantino, and yet for reasons unknown by me, it’s never officially come out on DVD. Sure, you can order it on demand from MGM, but it’s just not the same as buying a big special edition of the film in a brick and mortar store. It’s quite the entertaining yet still heartbreaking tale of an obviously damaged Vietnam vet who goes on the warpath against an exceptionally sweaty James Best-far away from his Dukes of Hazzard character-and his buddies for their killing of his family. It’s worth seeing and when you do see violence… it’s quality. Seeing it on MGMHD is the best way to see it.
The second movie was Foxy Brown. It’s similar to Coffy, although I prefer Coffy to this by a small margin. It’s still a fun movie that has such oddities as some of the acting from Antonio Fargas, a tremendous fight scene involving the denizens of a lesbian bar (!) and the main villain being a woman. And, not too surprisingly, it is filled with nudity.
Finally, there’s Leviathan, one of the many underwater movies from ’89 with a quality cast (including Richard Crenna, Daniel Stern, Peter Weller, Amanda Pays, and Ernie Hudson) and a story that is quite derivative of such films as The Thing and (quite clearly) Alien anhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifd yet it’s enjoyable to watch. If yhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifou want a detailed recap (including spoilers) of the film that’s better than anything I can punch up, read the second half of this column. Hey, it's a film where tainted vodka plays an important part in the plot!
I’ll be back Monday night.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Original Gangstas
Original Gangstas (1996)
Runtime: 99 minutes
Directed by: Larry Cohen
Starring: Fred Williamson, Jim Brown, Pam Grier, Ron O’Neal, Richard Roundtree
From: Orion
Here is a movie that I’ve known about since it originally came out in ’96 (I actually remember advertisements for it on TV) but I only got to see it on Sunday night during the long day of movie-watching I had. It sounded interesting (a bunch of old blaxploitation vets get together to kick ass again against some young punks) but while it is watchable, it’s not like a blaxploitation version of The Expendables. Now, THAT would have been great for the 90’s to see these old favorites and young guys like, say, Ice T., Wesley Snipes, or Mario Van Peebles kicking ass against each other or together. It just wasn’t meant to be, though, and that makes me sad.
But, as for this movie, it’s a low-budget affair and while I would say it’s not like the best movies from the “soul cinema” of the 70’s, it still manages to be entertaining. You can tell that Williamson was one of the guys who produced this as he was the focus throughout. He plays a former pro football player (of course, something he was in real life) who returns to his hometown of Gary, Indiana-a rather nasty place, at least from the times I’ve driven by it on the Interstate in the past-to tend to his father, who was shot by a young punk. It deals with a gang in his old neighborhood, and ironically he was one of the original founders of that gang, but in those days it didn’t involve shooting people. Some other people get involved, such as the Brown and Grier characters, as their son manages to get murdered by the gang too. They try to stop the gang from terrorizing the neighborhood but the politicians in the city act like politicians and despite the efforts of people such as the Reverend played by Paul Winfield, the trio have to resort to violence to get their message across…
It’s interesting that I mention The Expendables earlier, as with that movie, here you have some characters be the main focus and much less focus is on the other ass-kickers in the film. Meaning, the roles of O’Neal and Roundtree are rather small. That’s fine, I suppose, but I wouldn’t have minded seeing more from them. I mean, all of the veteran actors* were more interesting than the young punkhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifs who played the young punks.
• Besides the people already mentioned, there are small roles from the likes of Charles Napier, Wings Hauser, and Robert Forster.
Along with the violence you get to see-which was fun to watch-there’s also drama involving people abandoning their city, said city falling into disrepair, and those sorts of themes. Dramatically, it was fine. It’s just that you can complain about the story at time. For example, the plan that Williamson comes up with to deal with the gang… it involves quite a bit of collateral damage. Good going there. Speaking of Fred, I’ve come to understand that he was friends with Larry Cohen (a famous helm of many B-movies) so that’s why he directed this, but they aren’t pals anymore and since then he’s badmouthed Cohen for the job he did here. You could argue either way of it’s warranted or not but that’s unfortunate to hear.
Anyhow, I say that if you make sure to keep your expectations in check, then you might end up enjoying this as a 100 minute time-waster, if not much else than that.
I’ll be back Friday night with something new.
Runtime: 99 minutes
Directed by: Larry Cohen
Starring: Fred Williamson, Jim Brown, Pam Grier, Ron O’Neal, Richard Roundtree
From: Orion
Here is a movie that I’ve known about since it originally came out in ’96 (I actually remember advertisements for it on TV) but I only got to see it on Sunday night during the long day of movie-watching I had. It sounded interesting (a bunch of old blaxploitation vets get together to kick ass again against some young punks) but while it is watchable, it’s not like a blaxploitation version of The Expendables. Now, THAT would have been great for the 90’s to see these old favorites and young guys like, say, Ice T., Wesley Snipes, or Mario Van Peebles kicking ass against each other or together. It just wasn’t meant to be, though, and that makes me sad.
But, as for this movie, it’s a low-budget affair and while I would say it’s not like the best movies from the “soul cinema” of the 70’s, it still manages to be entertaining. You can tell that Williamson was one of the guys who produced this as he was the focus throughout. He plays a former pro football player (of course, something he was in real life) who returns to his hometown of Gary, Indiana-a rather nasty place, at least from the times I’ve driven by it on the Interstate in the past-to tend to his father, who was shot by a young punk. It deals with a gang in his old neighborhood, and ironically he was one of the original founders of that gang, but in those days it didn’t involve shooting people. Some other people get involved, such as the Brown and Grier characters, as their son manages to get murdered by the gang too. They try to stop the gang from terrorizing the neighborhood but the politicians in the city act like politicians and despite the efforts of people such as the Reverend played by Paul Winfield, the trio have to resort to violence to get their message across…
It’s interesting that I mention The Expendables earlier, as with that movie, here you have some characters be the main focus and much less focus is on the other ass-kickers in the film. Meaning, the roles of O’Neal and Roundtree are rather small. That’s fine, I suppose, but I wouldn’t have minded seeing more from them. I mean, all of the veteran actors* were more interesting than the young punkhttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifs who played the young punks.
• Besides the people already mentioned, there are small roles from the likes of Charles Napier, Wings Hauser, and Robert Forster.
Along with the violence you get to see-which was fun to watch-there’s also drama involving people abandoning their city, said city falling into disrepair, and those sorts of themes. Dramatically, it was fine. It’s just that you can complain about the story at time. For example, the plan that Williamson comes up with to deal with the gang… it involves quite a bit of collateral damage. Good going there. Speaking of Fred, I’ve come to understand that he was friends with Larry Cohen (a famous helm of many B-movies) so that’s why he directed this, but they aren’t pals anymore and since then he’s badmouthed Cohen for the job he did here. You could argue either way of it’s warranted or not but that’s unfortunate to hear.
Anyhow, I say that if you make sure to keep your expectations in check, then you might end up enjoying this as a 100 minute time-waster, if not much else than that.
I’ll be back Friday night with something new.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Slaughter
Slaughter (1972)
Runtime: 91 minutes
Directed by: Jack Starrett
Starring: Jim Brown, Stella Stevens, Rip Torn, Cameron Mitchell, Don Gordon
From: AIP
So, apologies for this going up a little later than I had planned, but I had to take care of something else first. It was minor, but it still had to be done. Now, the past few days have been even busier than anticipated when it comes to watching movies, as I’ve watched quite a few the past few days. Most of them I think I’ll talk about in one big post where I say a few brief things about each one, but I picked this one out to talk about as there’s some enough material for me to talk about. First off, it’s nice to watch another blaxploitation film as I haven’t seen as many as I’d like to.
Now, this one is a little different, as much of it takes place in Mexico (where it in fact was filmed) but it’s still a very entertaining entry into that genre due to the amount of exciting action it has and frequent humor, both intentional and unintentional. First off, I have to mention that if you’ve seen Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds film and remember the awesome guitar riff that introduced the montage to Hugo Stiglitz, you should know that it wasn’t a modern guitar riff but rather one that began the title song for this film, done by the great Billy Preston. It also made for great opening credits for the movie. Besides the great guitar opening, the entire song is pretty awesome in that funky 70’s way.
The first 10 or 15 minutes are pretty wild, with the parents of former Green Beret Slaughter (Brown; but of course he’d have a character surname like that) getting blown up via a car bomb, Slaughter going to his apartment, shoots up the bathroom after hearing someone in there, only to discover it’s a girl who at the time claimed was a groupie. He calls her a bitch and throws her out naked! Then, he finds some of the people involved for killing his parents and he engages in a car vs. personal airplane contest. He gets in trouble with the Feds (led by Mitchell) and he ends up working for them in order to help them get “The Syndicate” in Mexico.
Yes, that was all in the beginning of the movie.
After that, things calm down, but he is (reluctantly) partnered up with Harry (Gordon) as they try to get to the bottom of the Mob’s usage of… a computer. Of course, at that time, a giant machine, but still progressive for ’72. But that’s secondary to his interaction with two characters, Dominic (Torn; he proves that even back this far, he still had bad hair) and his reluctant lady pal, Ann (Stevens; much to my surprise, she looked rather nice in a bikini back in this time period). From there, you have a lot of fist fights, gunplay, intrigue, and even a nice car chase. It’s all great entertainment and it’s never boring. I am glad I was able to see it on MGMHD on Sunday. If you enjoy this genre and haven’t seen this, I would say it’s a must to track down.
I haven’t seen its sequel, Slaughter’s Big Rip-Off, but I understand it’s lesser than this. Still, I’d like to see it, as the villain is… Ed McMahon. Yes, THAT Ed McMahon, Johnny Carson’s sidekick, who I understand plays a “tail-chasing crack hustler”, and I *have* to see the host of Star Search and pitchman for American Family Publishers playing a lecherous drug dealer!
I’ll be back Wednesday night and I’ll hopefully be more punctual.
Runtime: 91 minutes
Directed by: Jack Starrett
Starring: Jim Brown, Stella Stevens, Rip Torn, Cameron Mitchell, Don Gordon
From: AIP
So, apologies for this going up a little later than I had planned, but I had to take care of something else first. It was minor, but it still had to be done. Now, the past few days have been even busier than anticipated when it comes to watching movies, as I’ve watched quite a few the past few days. Most of them I think I’ll talk about in one big post where I say a few brief things about each one, but I picked this one out to talk about as there’s some enough material for me to talk about. First off, it’s nice to watch another blaxploitation film as I haven’t seen as many as I’d like to.
Now, this one is a little different, as much of it takes place in Mexico (where it in fact was filmed) but it’s still a very entertaining entry into that genre due to the amount of exciting action it has and frequent humor, both intentional and unintentional. First off, I have to mention that if you’ve seen Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds film and remember the awesome guitar riff that introduced the montage to Hugo Stiglitz, you should know that it wasn’t a modern guitar riff but rather one that began the title song for this film, done by the great Billy Preston. It also made for great opening credits for the movie. Besides the great guitar opening, the entire song is pretty awesome in that funky 70’s way.
The first 10 or 15 minutes are pretty wild, with the parents of former Green Beret Slaughter (Brown; but of course he’d have a character surname like that) getting blown up via a car bomb, Slaughter going to his apartment, shoots up the bathroom after hearing someone in there, only to discover it’s a girl who at the time claimed was a groupie. He calls her a bitch and throws her out naked! Then, he finds some of the people involved for killing his parents and he engages in a car vs. personal airplane contest. He gets in trouble with the Feds (led by Mitchell) and he ends up working for them in order to help them get “The Syndicate” in Mexico.
Yes, that was all in the beginning of the movie.
After that, things calm down, but he is (reluctantly) partnered up with Harry (Gordon) as they try to get to the bottom of the Mob’s usage of… a computer. Of course, at that time, a giant machine, but still progressive for ’72. But that’s secondary to his interaction with two characters, Dominic (Torn; he proves that even back this far, he still had bad hair) and his reluctant lady pal, Ann (Stevens; much to my surprise, she looked rather nice in a bikini back in this time period). From there, you have a lot of fist fights, gunplay, intrigue, and even a nice car chase. It’s all great entertainment and it’s never boring. I am glad I was able to see it on MGMHD on Sunday. If you enjoy this genre and haven’t seen this, I would say it’s a must to track down.
I haven’t seen its sequel, Slaughter’s Big Rip-Off, but I understand it’s lesser than this. Still, I’d like to see it, as the villain is… Ed McMahon. Yes, THAT Ed McMahon, Johnny Carson’s sidekick, who I understand plays a “tail-chasing crack hustler”, and I *have* to see the host of Star Search and pitchman for American Family Publishers playing a lecherous drug dealer!
I’ll be back Wednesday night and I’ll hopefully be more punctual.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Baraka
Baraka (1992)
Runtime: 96 minutes
Directed by: Ron Fricke
Starring: Well, this is a documentary
From: Magidson Films
Here’s something out of the ordinary: a wordless documentary filled with beautiful images filmed across the world. This is of course not a new thing in films, with previous films like Koyaanisqatsi and Powaqqatsi being much of the same thing… or so I understand, considering that I haven’t seen either 80’s film before.
It’s difficult to describe such a film, as it could really be interpreted in any way, but I can tell you that you get to see such things as people praying across the world, various cultures and their unique dancing/ceremonies they do, horrific images from such places as Auschwitz in current (re, early 90’s) times, how chaotic urban life is, and beautiful buildings and scenery from all around the Earth. What I got is that while people from across the world are all different and some have much more hectic lifestyles than others, we’re all human beings on this planet and we have that basic aspect in common, but we also have such natural things in common as praying to whatever deity you believe in, ritualistic ceremonies, the capability to hurt one another and do damage to this planet, and you should appreciate this planet and everyone on it, no matter their skin color. It reminds me of how Edward James Olmos said in the Q&A I saw him at last month that he also believes that there should be no such thing as “race” as we’re all the same in essence.
What works perfectly with the images is the musical score by Michael Sterns, as it fits the different images like a glove, ranging from intense and moody to ethereal and peaceful. One can’t work without the other. I am happy that the director plan on releasing a sequel to this sometime later this year, called Sansara. That should hopefully be as great.
I do have to spend some time talking about the Blu-Ray of this movie, which is how I got to watch it for the first time. I doubt you’ll find a Blu-Ray with better sound or picture. No hyperbole. The case spent time pimping the meticulous work formatting this from its original 70mm print to Blu-Ray, and for good reason. I’ve never come close to seeing a better and clearer picture, and the sound was also of the same high quality. “Astonishing” is the best word to use to describe my first impressions. It’s something you NEED to get if you want to show off the highest capabilities of your home theatre system to your pals or what have you.
I'll be back Monday night with a new review.
Runtime: 96 minutes
Directed by: Ron Fricke
Starring: Well, this is a documentary
From: Magidson Films
Here’s something out of the ordinary: a wordless documentary filled with beautiful images filmed across the world. This is of course not a new thing in films, with previous films like Koyaanisqatsi and Powaqqatsi being much of the same thing… or so I understand, considering that I haven’t seen either 80’s film before.
It’s difficult to describe such a film, as it could really be interpreted in any way, but I can tell you that you get to see such things as people praying across the world, various cultures and their unique dancing/ceremonies they do, horrific images from such places as Auschwitz in current (re, early 90’s) times, how chaotic urban life is, and beautiful buildings and scenery from all around the Earth. What I got is that while people from across the world are all different and some have much more hectic lifestyles than others, we’re all human beings on this planet and we have that basic aspect in common, but we also have such natural things in common as praying to whatever deity you believe in, ritualistic ceremonies, the capability to hurt one another and do damage to this planet, and you should appreciate this planet and everyone on it, no matter their skin color. It reminds me of how Edward James Olmos said in the Q&A I saw him at last month that he also believes that there should be no such thing as “race” as we’re all the same in essence.
What works perfectly with the images is the musical score by Michael Sterns, as it fits the different images like a glove, ranging from intense and moody to ethereal and peaceful. One can’t work without the other. I am happy that the director plan on releasing a sequel to this sometime later this year, called Sansara. That should hopefully be as great.
I do have to spend some time talking about the Blu-Ray of this movie, which is how I got to watch it for the first time. I doubt you’ll find a Blu-Ray with better sound or picture. No hyperbole. The case spent time pimping the meticulous work formatting this from its original 70mm print to Blu-Ray, and for good reason. I’ve never come close to seeing a better and clearer picture, and the sound was also of the same high quality. “Astonishing” is the best word to use to describe my first impressions. It’s something you NEED to get if you want to show off the highest capabilities of your home theatre system to your pals or what have you.
I'll be back Monday night with a new review.
Friday, May 13, 2011
Friday The 13th (The Remake, Unfortunately)
Friday the 13th (2009)
25% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 161 reviews)
Runtime: 106 minutes (extended version)
Directed by: Marcus Nispel
Starring: Jared Padalecki, Danielle Panabaker, Amanda Righetti, Travis Van Winkle, Derek Mears
From: New Line Cinema/Paramount
Yep, the perfect movie to review for today. Well, actually, it’d be best if I would have chosen a FUN Jason Voorhees movie to watch, but a reason to see this again is to tell an interesting story. Way back in ’09 I saw this movie at its midnight debut, which happened to also be on a Friday the 13th. It was a crowded screening and it was THE perfect audience to see a horror movie with. They went monkeyshit crazy for everything and loved this to death. Some ladies around me seemingly soiled their pants each time something even a tiny bit scary could happen, which made things a lot of fun. I realized then the movie wasn’t so good, but solely due to the crowd I loved the experience.
In the next few days, when I heard outrage from the horror community in general about how bad the movie was and how it wasn’t really a Jason film (what a shocker, given it came from Platinum Dunes, a bunch of clueless putzes who don’t know Jack about how to make a proper scary horror film; you shouldn’t expect anything more or less from such an awful person like Michael Bay) so I figured I shouldn’t see this movie again as it would ruin the good memories I had of it.
Well, unfortunately, I went against that promise.
This movie was a reboot of the series and the opening was the end of the original film, where Jason’s mom gets killed and he sees it. Then, the film turns into Parts 2 and 3, where you see Mr. Voorhees both with the sack on his head and the iconic hockey mask look. The plot is first a bunch of kids looking for a weed stash, only for Jason to take them out for taking his stash… at least that’s what I assumed. Then, six weeks pass by and you see some new kids go to a cabin, while the brother of one of the missing ladies from the opening segment is on the hunt for her.
So, the reason why this movie turned off many people is that it’s just another crappy slasher from Platinum Dunes instead of something that feels like a Jason Voorhees film. Jason does things like kidnapping, keeping a captive alive (and for stupid and ridiculous reasons too), and apparently being as good at ARCHERY as Rambo. Pretty dumb, I know… I mean, for the filmmakers to have Jason do such things. Then, most of the characters are just annoying and dumb, and not in a fun way like in the 80’s films. And speaking of that, they happened to have nudity and drug use and it’s presented casually. Here, there’s a lot of it and it’s shoved down your throat. Talk about missing the point.
But, worst of all is that most of the kills aren’t even that good/inventive. That’s a lot of the fun of the movie is seeing how Voorhees offed victims or at the end, seeing the hero stop him. Instead of having unique kills, most of them are just lame and sometimes, it seems like they tease you by showing objects that *would* make great weapons for destruction, but they never get used. What a fail. I guess we should be thankful that Platinum Dunes hasn’t done a sequel to this, and hopefully the next Jason film that gets made, some people with brains are behind it, and actual fans can make something that fits in the spirit of those cheesy and awful and yet still fun 80’s flicks. Not too much is fun about this; there’s definitely nothing like Crispin Glover dancing weirdly to an ubercheesy hair metal tune.
Oh well… at least Aaron Yoo as the goofy Asian stoner was amusing, and Mears as Jason did a great job considering what he was given to work with.
I'll be back tomorrow afternoon-that's right-with a new review.
25% on Rotten Tomatoes (out of 161 reviews)
Runtime: 106 minutes (extended version)
Directed by: Marcus Nispel
Starring: Jared Padalecki, Danielle Panabaker, Amanda Righetti, Travis Van Winkle, Derek Mears
From: New Line Cinema/Paramount
Yep, the perfect movie to review for today. Well, actually, it’d be best if I would have chosen a FUN Jason Voorhees movie to watch, but a reason to see this again is to tell an interesting story. Way back in ’09 I saw this movie at its midnight debut, which happened to also be on a Friday the 13th. It was a crowded screening and it was THE perfect audience to see a horror movie with. They went monkeyshit crazy for everything and loved this to death. Some ladies around me seemingly soiled their pants each time something even a tiny bit scary could happen, which made things a lot of fun. I realized then the movie wasn’t so good, but solely due to the crowd I loved the experience.
In the next few days, when I heard outrage from the horror community in general about how bad the movie was and how it wasn’t really a Jason film (what a shocker, given it came from Platinum Dunes, a bunch of clueless putzes who don’t know Jack about how to make a proper scary horror film; you shouldn’t expect anything more or less from such an awful person like Michael Bay) so I figured I shouldn’t see this movie again as it would ruin the good memories I had of it.
Well, unfortunately, I went against that promise.
This movie was a reboot of the series and the opening was the end of the original film, where Jason’s mom gets killed and he sees it. Then, the film turns into Parts 2 and 3, where you see Mr. Voorhees both with the sack on his head and the iconic hockey mask look. The plot is first a bunch of kids looking for a weed stash, only for Jason to take them out for taking his stash… at least that’s what I assumed. Then, six weeks pass by and you see some new kids go to a cabin, while the brother of one of the missing ladies from the opening segment is on the hunt for her.
So, the reason why this movie turned off many people is that it’s just another crappy slasher from Platinum Dunes instead of something that feels like a Jason Voorhees film. Jason does things like kidnapping, keeping a captive alive (and for stupid and ridiculous reasons too), and apparently being as good at ARCHERY as Rambo. Pretty dumb, I know… I mean, for the filmmakers to have Jason do such things. Then, most of the characters are just annoying and dumb, and not in a fun way like in the 80’s films. And speaking of that, they happened to have nudity and drug use and it’s presented casually. Here, there’s a lot of it and it’s shoved down your throat. Talk about missing the point.
But, worst of all is that most of the kills aren’t even that good/inventive. That’s a lot of the fun of the movie is seeing how Voorhees offed victims or at the end, seeing the hero stop him. Instead of having unique kills, most of them are just lame and sometimes, it seems like they tease you by showing objects that *would* make great weapons for destruction, but they never get used. What a fail. I guess we should be thankful that Platinum Dunes hasn’t done a sequel to this, and hopefully the next Jason film that gets made, some people with brains are behind it, and actual fans can make something that fits in the spirit of those cheesy and awful and yet still fun 80’s flicks. Not too much is fun about this; there’s definitely nothing like Crispin Glover dancing weirdly to an ubercheesy hair metal tune.
Oh well… at least Aaron Yoo as the goofy Asian stoner was amusing, and Mears as Jason did a great job considering what he was given to work with.
I'll be back tomorrow afternoon-that's right-with a new review.
Monday, May 9, 2011
Damn Food Poisoning
Well, due to me eating something bad yesterday and suffering the effects of it last night and recovering from it today, no new reviews. I'll be back on Friday. Apologies for another delay, but I think I'll be a posting machine for the second half of this month.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Another Post Of Randomness
So, I will mention a pair of movies and then mention a service I signed up a few days ago for free that I’ll get to experience for a month.
I saw Undisputed III: Redemption. It follows the end of Undisputed II. Not to give spoilers from Undisputed II, but the villain of that, Boyka, gets hurt in the big fight and in III, he’s injured and now the de facto good guy. He becomes a big part of a tournament of the best prison fighters from across the world, held in Georgia (and I don’t mean the state where Atlanta’s the capital). Truth be told, I preferred the second movie overall. Sure, there’s also great action here (and actor Marko Zaror may become another well-known B-level martial arts movie star if he gets more work outside of his native Chile) but the problem is, I didn’t really care for the story here. Some dumb/aggravating things, and then there’s the character of Turbo, who reached about a Jar Jar Binks-level of annoyance with me, and of course he turns out to have one of the biggest parts in the film. You may feel differently and you may enjoy it more-which is apparently the general consensus-but for me…
Also, I recently watched Centurion, the latest film from Neil Marshall, the director of The Descent and Doomsday. Here’s another movie I’ve heard rave reviews about, but I was mostly eh about. It was little things, like the text you see on the screen being either impossible or really hard to read, or the blood you see splattered on the screen looking REALLY fake to the point of distraction and yeah, I was hoping I’d like this more than I did, despite the entertaining action scenes I did see at times in the film.
Anyhow, on a lighter note I can say that I used an old college e-mail address to sign up for Hulu Plus for a month's time. Up to early June I'll check out (and review) some stuff on there. Likely it will mainly be Criterion films. I'll be classin' it up around here for the next few weeks, I'm predicting.
I'll be back tomorrow night with a new review.
I saw Undisputed III: Redemption. It follows the end of Undisputed II. Not to give spoilers from Undisputed II, but the villain of that, Boyka, gets hurt in the big fight and in III, he’s injured and now the de facto good guy. He becomes a big part of a tournament of the best prison fighters from across the world, held in Georgia (and I don’t mean the state where Atlanta’s the capital). Truth be told, I preferred the second movie overall. Sure, there’s also great action here (and actor Marko Zaror may become another well-known B-level martial arts movie star if he gets more work outside of his native Chile) but the problem is, I didn’t really care for the story here. Some dumb/aggravating things, and then there’s the character of Turbo, who reached about a Jar Jar Binks-level of annoyance with me, and of course he turns out to have one of the biggest parts in the film. You may feel differently and you may enjoy it more-which is apparently the general consensus-but for me…
Also, I recently watched Centurion, the latest film from Neil Marshall, the director of The Descent and Doomsday. Here’s another movie I’ve heard rave reviews about, but I was mostly eh about. It was little things, like the text you see on the screen being either impossible or really hard to read, or the blood you see splattered on the screen looking REALLY fake to the point of distraction and yeah, I was hoping I’d like this more than I did, despite the entertaining action scenes I did see at times in the film.
Anyhow, on a lighter note I can say that I used an old college e-mail address to sign up for Hulu Plus for a month's time. Up to early June I'll check out (and review) some stuff on there. Likely it will mainly be Criterion films. I'll be classin' it up around here for the next few weeks, I'm predicting.
I'll be back tomorrow night with a new review.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Undisputed II: Last Man Standing
Undisputed II: Last Man Standing (2006)
Runtime: 98 minutes
Directed by: Isaac Florentine
Starring: Michael Jai White, Scott Adkins, Ben Cross, Eli Danker, Mark Ivanir
From: Nu Image
So, here’s yet another low-budget direct to DVD action film that is well-worth tracking down and for me (at least) delivers far better on the entertainment and action folds than many of the big screen action films in recent years. From the likes of Universal Soldier: Regeneration to Ninja (by the same director as this film), to Blood & Bone, they all get high marks from me. Well, this movie belongs in the same discussion.
This is a sequel to a Walter Hill movie about boxing in prison starring Wesley Snipes and Ving Rhames; you don’t need to see that one. I mean, I haven’t seen it and it means nothing here. So, former Heavyweight Champion George “Iceman” Chambers (White, playing the Rhames character in the first film) is in Russia in order to try and earn money, as hey, he’s a now-broke athlete who still has an attitude problem… so, the typical retired athlete. He gets set up in order to get arrested and sent to a nasty prison. This happens because in that prison, there’s a secret MMA-style fight thing going on where various criminal fighters from Russia go against the champ in that prison, Uri Boyka (Adkins). It’s a set-up where people on the outside bet on the fights and it’s broadcast via closed circuit to various locations, and it’s done between the warden inside and mob types outside. Chambers is defiant at first but he’s forced to change his tune. Meanwhile, he starts to get to know some of his fellow prisoners there.
Well, the plot is what it is. Nothing too revolutionary. But, as you’d expect it’s all about the action and fights, and they do deliver. You get to see plenty of fights, and not just battles in the ring either. It’s spread out enough to where you’re never bored. There’s also the aspect that Iceman gets to know some of the people there and that helps in changing his bad attitude. It’s cliché stuff (some cheesy drama at times, especially in the very last scene) but still entertaining. You also get to see a Russian version of both John Hurt and Sam Elliott. Wacky. Then again, this is a movie directed by a Brit, starring a Brit playing a Russian and American, and set in Russia but filmed in Bulgaria.
I mean, there is the aspect of the ex-boxer having to become more of an MMA fighter to stand a chance against Boyka. That’s fine by me, as I think boxing is boring hug-filled stuff compared to something like mixed martial arts. I’m not interested in that “big” boxing fight tomorrow night, that’s for damn sure.
I’ll be back Monday night with a new review, but the night before that I’ll post something pretty short.
Runtime: 98 minutes
Directed by: Isaac Florentine
Starring: Michael Jai White, Scott Adkins, Ben Cross, Eli Danker, Mark Ivanir
From: Nu Image
So, here’s yet another low-budget direct to DVD action film that is well-worth tracking down and for me (at least) delivers far better on the entertainment and action folds than many of the big screen action films in recent years. From the likes of Universal Soldier: Regeneration to Ninja (by the same director as this film), to Blood & Bone, they all get high marks from me. Well, this movie belongs in the same discussion.
This is a sequel to a Walter Hill movie about boxing in prison starring Wesley Snipes and Ving Rhames; you don’t need to see that one. I mean, I haven’t seen it and it means nothing here. So, former Heavyweight Champion George “Iceman” Chambers (White, playing the Rhames character in the first film) is in Russia in order to try and earn money, as hey, he’s a now-broke athlete who still has an attitude problem… so, the typical retired athlete. He gets set up in order to get arrested and sent to a nasty prison. This happens because in that prison, there’s a secret MMA-style fight thing going on where various criminal fighters from Russia go against the champ in that prison, Uri Boyka (Adkins). It’s a set-up where people on the outside bet on the fights and it’s broadcast via closed circuit to various locations, and it’s done between the warden inside and mob types outside. Chambers is defiant at first but he’s forced to change his tune. Meanwhile, he starts to get to know some of his fellow prisoners there.
Well, the plot is what it is. Nothing too revolutionary. But, as you’d expect it’s all about the action and fights, and they do deliver. You get to see plenty of fights, and not just battles in the ring either. It’s spread out enough to where you’re never bored. There’s also the aspect that Iceman gets to know some of the people there and that helps in changing his bad attitude. It’s cliché stuff (some cheesy drama at times, especially in the very last scene) but still entertaining. You also get to see a Russian version of both John Hurt and Sam Elliott. Wacky. Then again, this is a movie directed by a Brit, starring a Brit playing a Russian and American, and set in Russia but filmed in Bulgaria.
I mean, there is the aspect of the ex-boxer having to become more of an MMA fighter to stand a chance against Boyka. That’s fine by me, as I think boxing is boring hug-filled stuff compared to something like mixed martial arts. I’m not interested in that “big” boxing fight tomorrow night, that’s for damn sure.
I’ll be back Monday night with a new review, but the night before that I’ll post something pretty short.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
The Living Daylights
The Living Daylights (1987)
Runtime: 130 minutes
Directed by: John Glen
Starring: Timothy Dalton, Maryam D’Abo, Joe Don Baker, Jeroen Krabbe
From: United Artists
Here’s something that’s out of order when it comes to me wanting to review all the Bond movies in order… besides me not having been doing that for months now, due to what was announced on Sunday night and its relation to this movie, it was only appropriate to talk about this film; I haven’t seen it in months but I remember it well-enough. Unfortunately, one aspect of the movie has it real dated, and of course it’s the fact that just like in Rambo 3, a beloved action figure helps out the Mujahideen in Afghanistan against those damn Commie Soviets that invaded their country, as hey, the U.S. really did help out that rebel group to prevent the Russians from controlling the country. Well, problem is, Osama bin Laden was a real-life member of the Mujahideen before forming Al-Qaeda, and we know what happened with Afghanistan in the past 20 years… despite that “whoops” moment, you can still enjoy Rambo 3 or this movie and not think about what happened in real life after those films got released.
This was the first of only two movies that Dalton did as Bond. He didn’t get a fair shake due to circumstances beyond his control. It’s a shame, as he made a fine Bond.
This movie is a typical Bond movie, with many surprises and twits & turns, notable action scenes, and some goofy humor; as Dalton wasn’t exactly like Roger Moore, he probably gritted his teeth while delivering those cornball lines. Anyhow, the plot revolves around Bond getting a Soviet defector to the West, the Commies seemingly getting him back, and the people who are behind the plot for their own gain.
It’s tough to say how this movie ranks among Bond fans, as I swear everyone has their own unique list for the ranking of Bond film from best to worst, and no two lists are the same. Personally, I say it’s underrated. There are many different locales, from London to Slovakia, from Vienna to Tangier, and finally Afghanistan. Classic espionage stuff, especially the fact that the plot also involves such things as a weapons heist and opium smuggling. There’s the usual romance with Bond and a lovely lady, this time with cello player Kara (D’Abo). That leads to a wacky action scene involving a cello case. Speaking of action scenes, there’s a lot of entertaining ones here, from another wacky one (this time involving a milkman and a Walkman!) to automatic doors being used in a deadly manner; there’s a great scene involving a cargo plane and people hanging from it via a net, and those stunt people must have been insane to have done some of the things they did.
The movie isn’t perfect, as admittedly the villains aren’t the best and there isn’t enough time to make them memorable or too dangerous. Even with that, though, the movie is worth seeing if you like the more well-known Bond flicks and haven’t seen this yet. You may enjoy it more than you’d think.
I do have to mention the very interesting opening. There’s a training exercise that three 00 agents go on at Gibraltar. Well, it goes wrong and a killer is actually on the loose there. Besides 007, there’s two other agents who happen to look like Roger Moore and George Lazenby. It should be no surprise that of the two, the dude that resembled Lazenby was the one who got a violent death. You know that wasn’t by coincidence either! That was a middle finger to the guy who thumbed his nose at the franchise by quitting even before On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (which I promise I’ll review later this month) premiered.
I’ll be back Friday night with a new review.
Runtime: 130 minutes
Directed by: John Glen
Starring: Timothy Dalton, Maryam D’Abo, Joe Don Baker, Jeroen Krabbe
From: United Artists
Here’s something that’s out of order when it comes to me wanting to review all the Bond movies in order… besides me not having been doing that for months now, due to what was announced on Sunday night and its relation to this movie, it was only appropriate to talk about this film; I haven’t seen it in months but I remember it well-enough. Unfortunately, one aspect of the movie has it real dated, and of course it’s the fact that just like in Rambo 3, a beloved action figure helps out the Mujahideen in Afghanistan against those damn Commie Soviets that invaded their country, as hey, the U.S. really did help out that rebel group to prevent the Russians from controlling the country. Well, problem is, Osama bin Laden was a real-life member of the Mujahideen before forming Al-Qaeda, and we know what happened with Afghanistan in the past 20 years… despite that “whoops” moment, you can still enjoy Rambo 3 or this movie and not think about what happened in real life after those films got released.
This was the first of only two movies that Dalton did as Bond. He didn’t get a fair shake due to circumstances beyond his control. It’s a shame, as he made a fine Bond.
This movie is a typical Bond movie, with many surprises and twits & turns, notable action scenes, and some goofy humor; as Dalton wasn’t exactly like Roger Moore, he probably gritted his teeth while delivering those cornball lines. Anyhow, the plot revolves around Bond getting a Soviet defector to the West, the Commies seemingly getting him back, and the people who are behind the plot for their own gain.
It’s tough to say how this movie ranks among Bond fans, as I swear everyone has their own unique list for the ranking of Bond film from best to worst, and no two lists are the same. Personally, I say it’s underrated. There are many different locales, from London to Slovakia, from Vienna to Tangier, and finally Afghanistan. Classic espionage stuff, especially the fact that the plot also involves such things as a weapons heist and opium smuggling. There’s the usual romance with Bond and a lovely lady, this time with cello player Kara (D’Abo). That leads to a wacky action scene involving a cello case. Speaking of action scenes, there’s a lot of entertaining ones here, from another wacky one (this time involving a milkman and a Walkman!) to automatic doors being used in a deadly manner; there’s a great scene involving a cargo plane and people hanging from it via a net, and those stunt people must have been insane to have done some of the things they did.
The movie isn’t perfect, as admittedly the villains aren’t the best and there isn’t enough time to make them memorable or too dangerous. Even with that, though, the movie is worth seeing if you like the more well-known Bond flicks and haven’t seen this yet. You may enjoy it more than you’d think.
I do have to mention the very interesting opening. There’s a training exercise that three 00 agents go on at Gibraltar. Well, it goes wrong and a killer is actually on the loose there. Besides 007, there’s two other agents who happen to look like Roger Moore and George Lazenby. It should be no surprise that of the two, the dude that resembled Lazenby was the one who got a violent death. You know that wasn’t by coincidence either! That was a middle finger to the guy who thumbed his nose at the franchise by quitting even before On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (which I promise I’ll review later this month) premiered.
I’ll be back Friday night with a new review.
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