Return to Oz

Return to Oz (1985)

Runtime: 109 wild minutes

Directed by: Walter Murch

Starring: Fariuza Balk, Nicol Williamson, Jean Marsh, Piper Laurie, Matt Clark

From: Disney

You know, it could have been a good thing I did not see this as a kid. As a middle-aged man in the United States, the Wizard of Oz was a yearly tradition where CBS played the film; millions loved viewing this w/ family, me included. Return to Oz, the trailer was on an 80’s Disney VHS tape-I was left w/ the impression the movie was “scary” and “weird” so I never gave this 80's sequel a shot until last night. Indeed, Return is much darker and serious than the original movie, although apparently this is more in tune w/ the L. Frank Baum novels. 

The opening 15 or so minutes set the tone; 6 months after the big tornado, it is revealed that not only does Dorothy suffer from insomnia, she actually went to Oz. Dorothy is sent to a sanitarium; only divine intervention prevented electroshock therapy! Once back in Oz, instead of the shimmering magical land, this world is not decrepit and run-down; even the Yellow Brick Road is in shambles. Blame the Nome King for this.

The original Wizard of Oz was weird, between its flying monkeys, houses accidentally dropped on witches and sentient trees. Return, even the ragtag group of helpers for its leads were weird. It’s impossible to quickly explain Gump or why it’s an elk head so instead I’ll mention Dorothy’s chicken that suddenly can talk, Jack Pumpkinhead, and a mechanical man named… Tik-Tok! Was this where TikTok got its name from? I knew about the Wheelers but not the above-mentioned information, or a tree that bears—lunch pails (?!) or a witch that… RIPS HER HEAD OFF because she has a few dozen heads in her home! What in the world would I have thought of this as a child?

No telling; while Large Marge was a “yikes!” for me, that didn’t prevent me from finishing Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure or viewing it more than once, so who knows. Those readers that have children, who knows what their reaction would be. As a middle-aged dude in 2025, I can enjoy this dark tale which features glorious practical effects, including the Nome King and its henchman-both stop-motion animation delights-and the sometimes lush sets. Also, what a find that child actor Fairuza Balk was; a lesser performer and the movie would have undoubtedly suffered. Not a surprise that even audiences in the more carefree 80’s didn’t like Return to Oz; a shame that legendary editor Walter Murch only was able to direct on this one occasion.

As mentioned recently, a shame that Disney likely won’t be this adventurous again. Yes, Return flopped at the box office but I’m begging for a return of weird, original, and well-made pictures like this instead of the sludge we get now.

Enter the Ninja

Enter the Ninja (1981)

Runtime: 99 minutes

Directed by: Menahem Golan

Starring: Franco Nero, Christopher George, Alex Courtney, Susan George, Sho Kosugi

From: Cannon

This sure was a Golan-Globus production. For ages I’ve known of the trilogy of ninja movies that Cannon did in the 80’s, and how this first entry started a ninja craze in the United States for a time. While the movie is utter B-movie nonsense and you can unleash an onslaught of nitpicks if you’re so inclined, such as believing Franco Nero as a ninja master who lays waste to the enemies while he spends time in the Philippines (where this was set and filmed) w/ old war buddy Frank Landers and the buddy’s wife Susan George. The enemy is Christopher George, no relation to Susan. He was appropriately over-the-top as the heel.

I mostly won’t nitpick, although the fact that the hero’s friend engages in cockfighting is regrettable. Yes, I realize that sport has been around for ancient times and is still popular in the Philippines; it’s just be a lot less awkward for most American viewers, that’s all. Otherwise, while of course the action isn’t as stellar as what you’d find in the Pacific Rim region of Asia at the time, that is more my complimenting how great those choreographers were—what’s here was still fine.

Christopher George wants the land of Nero’s buddy as it contains oil; they refuse to sell and from there, the stakes escalated. The plot needn’t be more complicated than that when there were wacky characters present such as Hook, a small fat dude w/ a second-rate German accent who has a hook for a left hand. I was also amused by Dollars, the money-hungry business owner that assisted the heroes and was portrayed by Will Hare, best known for his brief appearance in Back to the Future and the old grandpa in Silent Night, Deadly Night. He was a real hoot and played a larger role than expected.

For those that want a competent B-movie w/ some money behind it which featured nice Filipino scenery, a rad percussive score featuring plenty of synth from W. Michael Lewis and Laurin Rinder, some bloody moments, and a general absurd quality—you may have fun like I did. While not the largest role, it’s always nice seeing Sho Kosugi.

The highlight was a moment completely out of nowhere: the war buddy tells Nero that his wife Susan wants sexual relations constantly, but he… well, would use Viagra if it existed in 1981! If that wasn’t enough humiliation, soon thereafter Nero and this poor sap’s wife have sex while he’s oblivious to it! No word on why Frank Landers was so emasculated.

Lilo and Stitch

Yes, I finally saw the 2002 animated movie: 

Will people be AGHAST that I hadn’t tackled Lilo & Stitch before? Probably so. The live-action version coming out next weekend is the reason why I finally pulled the trigger. No, I won’t be checking out the remake, as what’s the point? That goes for any studio who does this, not just Disney. Yes, I do know the irony that the directors of this then made How to Train Your Dragon, and both received this treatment. Allegedly, they will stop needlessly remaking animated pictures due to the colossal fiasco that was Snow White. 

Through cultural osmosis, of course I knew “O’hana means family,” along with most of the main characters, the Elvis songs & Stitch being Experiment 626. It escapes and lands in Hawaii, where Lilo adopts the critter. Yeah, there are silly moments and I couldn’t even begin to fathom why a key supporting human character is named COBRA BUBBLES. Be that as it may, I was still charmed by Lilo & Stitch.

The bedrock of the film was the relationship between misfit 6-year-old Lilo and her teenage sister/guardian Nani. Through the struggles of the latter attempting to not lose the former to foster care, they have an entirely believable sister relationship. Thankfully, there are plenty of laughs also, between them and especially all the alien antics. Entertaining action beats plus a gorgeous water color animation aesthetic made the film an enjoyable ride-which was over in less than 90 minutes.

Another key aspect that was appealing: Lio’s love of Elvis and the inclusion of several Presley songs. There were also subtle and not so subtle nods to Hawaii & its culture. While not spotlighted, I noticed that they gave love to Duke Kahanamoku, a multi-time Olympic medalist in swimming turned surfing legend, sheriff of Honolulu for almost 30 years, and many other accolades. My family and I went to Hawaii in 2000 for vacation; then, there were statues and restaurants named after him in the area.

I’ve heard good things about the sequels and TV shows that were spawned from the success of this picture; I likely won’t delve further in this universe yet it was a relief that I was charmed by a movie that had serious, heartfelt moments married to an amusing tale where I both was enchanted by Stitch and rooted for the sisters.

Two Amusing Shemp Shorts

Shivering Sherlocks:

(Short # 104 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

Two random facts about me: 

1) My people skills aren't that great, especially off-line. The stupidity of others is why I've wanted to attend the cinema at two different points in the preceding week but through no fault of my own this hasn't happened. Perhaps next week it'll happen... I am not a people person in general—however, I enjoy all my followers on Letterboxd. Not every opinion I agree with but I know the feeling can be mutual with my occasional unpopular opinions.
2) I wanted to see a film yesterday. No, it wasn't Hurry Up Tomorrow. The reception that's received is rather, well, lackluster to be charitable. Despite an intriguing trailer, I was never interested. Truth be told, if I've heard a Weeknd song besides I Can't Feel My Face, I couldn't tell you! “I don't ever listen to modern music.” is perhaps an even more shocking revelation.

The reason I shared all this? Yesterday was a rather crummy day, one best left forgotten. On days like these in 2025, it's been a blessing to view The Three Stooges-apologies for the cliché but sometimes laughter is the best medicine.

In this installment, the trio are accused of robbing an armored car; they didn't help their case by randomly hiding in a garbage can! Why they did this, that is a mystery. A 1940's lie detector is shown-at least presumably this was what one looked like back then. Shemp concocts a random alibi that they work at the Elite Cafe. Thankfully for them, proprietor Christine McIntyre covers for them and they start working at the establishment. This results in new and old gags, including Shemp making chicken soup by pouring hot water through a chicken carcass, and Moe eating clam chowder; it goes awry in a similar fashion to Curly eating oysters in Dutiful but Dumb. In 1954 Larry gets in on the act 

Wouldn't you know who won the pony... the people who are hiding out in the family estate owned by McIntyre are the actual armored car robbers. This includes a subhuman hunchbacked hulking brute named Angel! Yes, a lot happens in Shivering Sherlocks. Funny antics occur in the house to conclude the short.

The most noteworthy aspect to me: this was the last short that Del Lord directed in this universe. He was in that chair for many of the best featuring Curly: Three Little Beers, Hoi Polloi, We Want Our Mummy, A Plumbing We Will Go, No Census, No Feeling, An Ache in Every Stake, They Stooge to Conga, etc. There thankfully are other talented directors who will continue to do a swell job in that chair, who will be mentioned in later installments.

Pardon My Clutch:  

(Short # 105 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

Another nice benefit of going through these Three Stooges shorts this year: when my schedule is all out of whack as it’s been the past several days, at least something can be posted without skipping a day. I’d like to think that normalcy is already back for me—but the way May has gone, nothing is set in stone.

Shemp’s under the weather in this short. Their pal is an amateur doctor and after the trio bungled the directions on a bottle of pills (they were confused by “skip an hour”) it was discovered that Shemp had a bad tooth-I sympathize as several days ago, a trip was made to the dentist for a procedure. That wasn’t fun; however, my dentist is a French lady w/ an accent, but I doubt the reader cares to hear those details.

After the tooth extraction-no, that wasn’t the procedure that was done to me; I mean Shemp had his bad tooth extracted-it was recommended that the boys go into the woods for vacation. Their pal procured a vehicle—only it was a jalopy from the 1920’s, a real wreck. 

Even before some new laughs were mined from them loading the vehicle, they attempted to pitch a tent… er, I mean practice putting up a tent. It goes as awry as expected. In a surprising change of pace, Moe, Larry, and Shemp all had wives. They were all exasperated by the behavior of their husbands. Yes, the Stooges and their wives all live in the same house yet don't own a car. I guess public transportation was great in that part of So Cal.

As there are new laughs to be had just from them attempting to load the car-which blends well with the modified gags that felt fresh throughout, it was irrelevant that this “journey” they attempted to take never left their street. Mix in a wacky bit part from Emil Sitka and Pardon My Clutch was a pretty good time.

Logan's Run

Logan’s Run (1976)

Runtime: 118 confounding minutes

Directed by: Michael Anderson

Starring: Michael York, Jenny Agutter, Richard Jordan, Roscoe Lee Browne, Farrah Fawcett

From: MGM

If only the characters, plot and especially storytelling could have matched the audio and visual components. As someone in my mid-40’s, I have known of Logan’s Run for years, including the main plot point that there’s a utopian society in the 23rd century where everyone dies at the age of 30… unless they are “renewed” in a ceremony called “carrousel” (yes, that’s how they spell it). I DVR’ed it from a TCM showing yesterday. Finally, I saw the movie in full and… for a plot that wasn’t overly complex, the way the story was told was just too baffling and too confusing too often. I still have no idea why certain key moments occurred, except “just because.”

What a shame it is. Some of the visual effects do show their age half a century after the fact but otherwise the aesthetic is awesome. A few of the sets I did pause for a bit to admire; the same goes for many of the miniatures. I did laugh that not only was “underwear” apparently not a thing by 2273, but many areas in the domed city look like malls or hotels in the future, including atriums all over the place. No hate for that; the filmmakers tried to use actual buildings when possible and it did amuse me. Also, the costuming was unforgettable, especially Jenny Agutter’s outfits… and you should have seen/heard my reaction at when Roscoe Lee Browne first appeared!

Logan (Michael York) and Jessica (Agutter) are on the run, looking to escape the domed world and reach “sanctuary”… don’t play a drinking game where you quaff a drink whenever “sanctuary” is said—you won’t make it to the end of the film! The plot’s destination wasn’t much a surprise; this would not have been an issue if I did not have multiple complaints concerning said plot. Sigh… another benefit is a unique Jerry Goldsmith score that sometimes goes 70’s electronic, which is a compliment.

While it’s a movie I wish could be loved by me, no regrets in experiencing the visually pleasant aesthetic moments throughout. At times I was reminded of Rollerball, another flawed 70’s sci-fi movie that has issues with its plot. How the 2002 Rollerball remake turned out reminds me why a new version of Logan’s Run does give me pause. It’s always nice seeing Peter Ustinov and what was needed after a bad day yesterday was my howling w/ laughter at the character Roscoe Lee Browne portrayed. Nothing could have prepared me (or you either) for his appearance; I was dumbfounded.

 

The Great Silence

The Great Silence (Il Grande Silenzio) (1968)

Runtime: 105 minutes

Directed by: Sergio Corbucci

Starring: Jean-Louis Trintignant, Klaus Kinski, Frank Wolff, Luigi Pistilli, Vonetta McGee

From: A few different French and Italian companies

I’ve been neglecting this snowy Western for far too long. As sometimes occurs, a highly-regarded movie was discovered years ago yet despite the high praise, the trigger isn’t pulled. Its showing on Turner Classic Movies last night + having free time meant there was no excuse in this instance.

There is a smattering of Westerns set in a snowy climate instead of a desert but this Sergio Corbucci effort is one of the most famous. Jean-Louis Trintignant is Silence, a mute gunslinger who helps a band of outlaws against bounty hunters and a corrupt banker. The film has high aspirations; after all, Corbucci was inspired by the deaths of Che Guevara and Malcolm X; a revisionist Western, this was. This protagonist had an antagonist in equal measure: Loco, as portrayed by real-life villain Klaus Kinski. 

Just as an important character as Silence and Loco is the wintry, bitterly cold weather in the Utah territory-filmed in the Dolomite Mountains of Italy. The stunning locations and the snowy landscape affect all the characters; the blizzard has caused many to steal and allowed for the evil banker Pollicut to concoct a scheme to steal land. There are quality performances all around: the Italian setting, Jean-Louis-he didn’t need speech to express emotion or be a commanding presence-Kinski, Luigi Pistilli, Frank Wolff, Vonetta McGee in her debut, etc.

Another key component: the Morricone score. It was dynamic, encompassing everything from the electric guitar to the sitar. The Great Silence is as austere and stark as its setting. This is a great movie no matter which genre or genres you prefer the most. I only have viewed The Hateful Eight once but it has to pair with this like peanut butter & jelly. If you love atypical Westerns in particular, this picture (many say it’s Corbucci’s magnum opus) is a must. I missed out on not pulling the trigger years earlier.

 

All Gummed Up

(Short # 103 in Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk: The Columbia Shorts of The Three Stooges)

Not top-tier Stooges yet still amusing. They operate a drugstore (which offers even more than at a modern Walgreens; for example, fishing poles are available) and much to my amazement, they were portrayed as more competent than usual. After a few throwaway gags, the main plot thread begins. Emil Sitka and Christine McIntyre are a couple in elderly makeup who move around like senior citizens; not only is he the drugstore landlord and wishes to kick them out for a better deal, he is also a cantankerous old man who is mad at his decrepit wife solely for her age.

The wacky premise is that they successfully concoct a Fountain of Youth potion w/ the ingredients & drugs they have in store (mixed in a boot, as they’ve done before) so McIntyre becomes a beautiful woman again. There are some solid laughs, although it’s not the strongest or most memorable Shemp short.

Those curious about the title: it references the main gag in the final few minutes, which does seem oddly-placed. The conclusion is of the non-sequitor type: at least in this universe-who knows about the 1940’s-giant marshmallows and huge pieces of bubblegum look exactly the same. Christine bakes a cake but wants marshmallows on top; apparently this used to be a thing. A mix-up happens, which does produce some funny visuals. Still, a rather peculiar conclusion.